"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

May 8, 2009 · 24 Comments

Thanks to all your donations in the TN Contest '08, I got to meet Jerry Yang of Yahoo! yesterday. Pictured: Jerry and I try to act natural while plotting world domination.
A big thank-you to Nicki …

The Vine: May 8, 2009
May 8, 2009 · 44 Comments

Hello Sars,
Longtime reader, first-time questioner! Here's my dilemma: I have insane, ridiculous, sensitive skin. No eczema or rosacea, just really pale, really hyper-sensitive skin. Because of this, I generally skip a lot of makeup.
But there …

"I was almost excommunicated in the second grade"
May 3, 2009 · 16 Comments

I never read the Sunday Times anymore, really, but I bought a copy of it today because I'm moving (no big whoop, just within Brooklyn, and more on that later but the moving process is …

The Vine: May 1, 2009
May 1, 2009 · 38 Comments

Hello Sars,
Sometime back in 1976-1980, I had a Snoopy plush doll that was about 10" (or so) tall, and one could buy outfits for him separately.There was a motorcycle outfit, a baseball outfit, a pajamas …

The Vine: April 29, 2009
April 29, 2009 · 81 Comments

I have a question for you and/or the readers, and it's kind of a dating etiquette question, but with legal overtones too.
A few weeks ago I met the Guy on a blind date, and we're …

My girl B. Art
April 27, 2009 · 34 Comments
My girl B. Art

I really can't say it better than Wing and I said it in the TWoP book. So, I won't. (Awesome image via Pop Hangover.)
Arthur, Bea. Bea Arthur starred in Maude and The Golden Girls, and …

Who's a good girl?
April 25, 2009 · 21 Comments
Who's a good girl?

1) The Boosh, who has just departed for her new home with 2) Miss Laura. Yay for both of them! And thanks again to 3) Elena at S.I. Feral Initiative, and to all the readers …

The Vine: April 24, 2009
April 24, 2009 · 59 Comments

Dear Sars,
My husband is driving me crazy. He's trying to remember a song he heard, oh, maybe five or 10 years ago, about the world ending (and no, it isn't REM's "End of the World …

The Yankee Years
April 23, 2009 · 12 Comments
<I>The Yankee Years</I>

On balance, an excellent read in spite of some frustrating overwriting.Plum-colored prose is a frequent fault of baseball books that I can tolerate at some times better than at others; here it's bothersome because Verducci …

"Psychic Friends"
April 22, 2009 · No Comment

The latest 90210 recap at

The Wilsons have finally sold their house in Kansas. The sole purpose of this development is apparently to inspire a subplot about Harry refusing to sell his Big Mouth Billy …