"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

TV Question Qorner: ESPN's grief management, Coach the dragon-slayer, et cetera
April 11, 2009 · 11 Comments
TV Question Qorner: ESPN's grief management, Coach the dragon-slayer, et cetera

Baseball Tonight. No doubt they meant well, and what happened to Nick Adenhart is undeniably a tragic waste, but Thursday's Very Special Episode seemed to me like cynical pandering.I can barely trust BT to tell …

The Vine: April 10, 2009
April 10, 2009 · 23 Comments

Hey Sars,
My beautiful cat, Tasha, has just been diagnosed with lymphoma. The vet says it's very treatable, but rarely curable. She's given so much to me in the ten years since I adopted her, the …

The Vine: April 8, 2009
April 8, 2009 · 70 Comments

Hi Sars —
I have wonderful, sweet, loving kitty cats, and I'm about to throw them out the window.
They both have good manners when it comes to using their litterbox. Everything goes in the correct place, …

"Crazy Train"
April 8, 2009 · No Comment

90210 118, "Off The Rails":

Silver, having abandoned her car downtown and freaked everyone out all the more, is at the train depot, blathering on to a stranger who looks like Denis Leary about chemical reactions …

Tomato Nation Goes To Washington: The Video
April 7, 2009 · 22 Comments

Yes, that guy really did yell, "C'mon, ketchup!"
Thanks to Mr. S for another fine effort in the footage-and-editing department — and of course to all of you for your extraordinary accomplishment.

"Seriously, was anybody editing this thing?"
April 5, 2009 · 32 Comments
"Seriously, was <I>anybody</I> editing this thing?"

The other day, I received an email from reader Todd K in which he crabbed at length about Jeff Pearlman's new book on Roger Clemens.I had just read in Sports Illustrated's baseball preview issue that …

TV Question Qorner: Lymanphobia, MtB goes to college, et al.
April 3, 2009 · 53 Comments
TV Question Qorner: Lymanphobia, <I>MtB</I> goes to college, et al.

CSI. When did it get so tiresome? I don't think it's because William Petersen left, but the timing does line up.
The real reason, I suspect, isn't exactly that one, but it's related. Between the downward …

The Vine: April 3, 2009
April 3, 2009 · 38 Comments

Sars, I'm hoping that you or the Tomatolings can help me find an unfindable item…
My mother-in-law has had both hips replaced, and last time she came for a visit she asked (politely) if we'd mind …

Meet the new boss
April 2, 2009 · 20 Comments

Please head on over to my day job: the new blog at, which formally launches today. Get your fill of celebrity snark, and feel free to tip us on your celeb sightings and/or gossip …

The Vine: April 1, 2009
April 1, 2009 · 36 Comments

Dear Sars,
I want to end a friendship without creating any animosity or ill feelings.I have been friends outside of work with someone I work fairly closely with, both in physical proximity and a lot of …