"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Dirty Harry
December 13, 2007 · 12 Comments
<I>Dirty Harry</I>

Motivational Techniques In Holiday-Shopping Completion: A Seminar By H. Callahan
I wonder how many people actually sit down to watch Dirty Harry anymore — it seems like one of those movies people don't bother seeing, because …

The Vine: December 13, 2007
December 13, 2007 · 9 Comments

I was getting a pedicure the other day and reading a copy of People magazine that had the gift guide in it.There was an ad for a baseball quiz book that had a …

Mitchell report due tomorrow
December 12, 2007 · 6 Comments's piece on the imminent Mitchell report on steroids in baseball is long, but comprehensive and worth the time. My sense has been for a while that the report would do very little, save to …

The Vine: December 12, 2007
December 12, 2007 · Comments Off on The Vine: December 12, 2007

I'm in a bit of an awkward situation and I could use some perspective.
It's complicated, but I'll try to break it down. Here's the cast of characters: the Boyfriend, the Best Friend and their respective …

The Vine: December 11, 2007
December 11, 2007 · 22 Comments

Hi Sars,
I'm looking for a horror movie I saw on TV as a kid sometime in the early '80s — it could even have been a TV movie. It was about a house that kills …

The Maltese Falcon
December 10, 2007 · 19 Comments
<I>The Maltese Falcon</I>

"That'll teach me to leave a broad alone with a bottle of scotch and a Topsy Tail. Never again, Mac."
I finally made it through this one last week, despite Humphrey Bogart's well-documented Ambien-esque effect …

Some questions, answered
December 7, 2007 · 14 Comments

"I still haven't heard from you about the prize I won/donated in the contest!"
I'm so sorry about that; I know it's taking a long time. The system I'm using to distribute the prizes is designed …

The Vine: December 5, 2007
December 5, 2007 · 14 Comments

About three or four years ago, I found these great bobby pins at a local chain drugstore. They're not the brown/black/brassy cheap-looking kind with the weird ridgey top. These were smooth with a slight curve. …

J Words
December 5, 2007 · 182 Comments

1. Something that is built haphazardly/slapped together/makeshift is:

a) jury-rigged; b) jerry-rigged

Both appear in the 11c; "jury-rigged" is the older construction. Which do you use?
2. Something that is built hastily/built poorly/looks cheap is:

a) …

The Vine: December 4, 2007
December 4, 2007 · 274 Comments

Hi Sars,
For one of my jobs, I need to compile a list of verbal pet peeves — the "if you will"s, "Joe and myself"s, and other grammar- and style-related mistakes that the unknowing often …