"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

The Vine: March 1, 2002
March 1, 2002 · No Comment

Dear Sarah,
Of course, the usual compliments about your site apply. We're both fans.
Our problem is this: A guy friend of ours (Bob) is dating a girl (Sue) we both know is a skank. We were …

The Vine: February 28, 2002
February 28, 2002 · No Comment

Hey Sars,
Just wanted to mention something that Trying To Deal might find helpful. Nearly every veterinary college has a Pet Loss Support Hotline these days. The people answering the telephone will understand how she feels, …

The Vine: February 27, 2002
February 27, 2002 · No Comment

I think your advice to Grumpy Grad Student is pretty spot-on, but I did want to add something. GGS's husband sounds a lot like many people I have met in Debtors Anonymous. I ended up …

The Vine: February 26, 2002
February 26, 2002 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
Here's the situation: I have been dating my boyfriend, Jim, for over two years. About a year of that has been long distance. In the non-long-distance times, we have lived together and also lived …

Child's Play
February 25, 2002 · No Comment

Whenever I hear one of my contemporaries waxing nostalgic about childhood, I have to suppress a snort. It's not that I had an unhappy childhood by any means; I grew up with a loving family …

The Vine: February 22, 2002
February 22, 2002 · One Comment

Dear Sars,
I have never asked for advice before, so here goes. I deeply care for this guy; in fact I think he may be the one, but I have deep commitment issues in the sense …

The Vine: February 20, 2002
February 20, 2002 · No Comment

Hi Sars,
Long-time listener, first-time caller. When I read Sad Sack Sis's letter
this morning, I almost fell out of my chair. This letter isn't really about me, but let's just say that I could have written …

The Vine: February 19, 2002
February 19, 2002 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
Why are some people such cowards? Seriously, how hard is it to pick up the phone and say "sorry, I don't think it's working." It takes less time then brushing your teeth, and allows …

Sick And Wrong
February 18, 2002 · One Comment

I do not like to throw up. Okay, nobody likes to throw up, obviously — it's not an activity people list among their hobbies in personal ads, and we'll never see Alex Trebek interviewing contestants …

The Vine: February 13, 2002
February 13, 2002 · No Comment

Hi Sars,
Rather than lying awake nights worrying about whether my new website will net me a stalker (okay, I exaggerate slightly — and that is on the off chance anyone will actually read it!), I …