"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Head Case
March 18, 2002 · No Comment

In college, we spent a lot of time on the theoretical. Part of that derived from our classes — although, if I recall correctly, I greeted my PHI 101 preceptor's question about the possibility that …

The Vine: March 15, 2002
March 15, 2002 · No Comment

Ms. Bunting,
I have some insight into Clueless's problem. I meandered through various jobs and majors to wind up as a very unhappy chemist. So, one summer I came across a book called Where Do I …

The Vine: March 14, 2002
March 14, 2002 · No Comment

Hello. Bow, scrape, nod, feh.
Mr. Yum-Buckets and I have been dating for about a year, and have lived in sin since around April. My family isn't keen on that but, having felt the need to …

The Vine: March 13, 2002
March 13, 2002 · No Comment

How can I figure out what I want to be when I grow up? I'm almost 29 and still have no clue what I am supposed to be doing. I'd love to be writing, but …

The Vine: March 12, 2002
March 12, 2002 · No Comment

Hey Sars.
I'm in a very similar situation to Philly, and I wanted to point her towards some useful resources. While I have a different type of seizure (and Depakote did nothing but make me sleepy, …

Girls, Girls, Girls
March 11, 2002 · 2 Comments

A couple of weeks ago, the New York Times Magazine ran an article entitled "Girls Just Want To Be Mean," about a woman named Rosalind Wiseman and her efforts to, as author Margaret Talbot describes …

The Vine: March 8, 2002
March 8, 2002 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
Here's my problem. I have epilepsy. It's not really a big deal, though. I was diagnosed in college; after two years of bizarre behavior, a couple grand mal seizures, and a gazillion tests, they …

The Vine: March 7, 2002
March 7, 2002 · No Comment

Hi Sars,
You might remember that I asked your advice last year about my flatmate who thought he was striking a blow for the proletariat by stealing a tin of tomatoes. Since your advice totally rocked …

The Vine: March 6, 2002
March 6, 2002 · No Comment

You are so-oooooo right on!
I think Confused in Colorado must be an unquestioning devotee of none other than the Misanthropic Bitch (but I'm sure you already knew that!). It's sad that people don't have the …

The Vine: March 5, 2002
March 5, 2002 · No Comment

Okay, first a little background stuff. I am 24 years old, first-year graduate student. I've spent the past two and a half years out of college working full-time, living on my own, and dating a …