Baseball

"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Home » Stories, True and Otherwise

The Nause-AA After Hours: Onomatopoll #3

Submitted by on November 3, 2012 – 11:02 AM10 Comments

Refried beans "compliments" of pasider.blogspot.com

Hello, everyone! You may remember that, during The Naus-AA proper, we talked about doing a master poll of all the vom sounds we came up with in the comments. Well, what better time than Halloween, when you've already gorged yourself on candy corn (hew), and/or presidential-election season with its figurative nauseation, to choose a barfavorite? (Unless you're really emeto-suggestible, in which case maaaaaybe skip it.)

I've got a spreadsheet — I know, right? — of all the sounds and the commenters responsible, and the coiners of the most "popular" (read: revolting) terms will win prizes, which I'll announce when we get to the finals.

I've compiled all the onomatopoeia into a series of three polls; you'll see all the "HOARF"s and "BRALF"s in alpha order, roughly. You vote for the three (3)…best? Most evocative? How you vote is up to you. The three finalists will proceed to another poll, where we'll choose the "winner."

Winner of the first round is: (HRRRAAAAALLLFFFF)
Winner of the second round is: hhooaarff 

Third and last poll is below. Choose the three (3) best, or most evocative, or whatever positive that isn't really a positive. Then go lie down. (Missed the other polls? Round 1 is right here, and Round 2 is here.)

Onomatopoll #3: Pick your three (3) top barf sounds!

  • SpeeYACK. (34%, 87 Votes)
  • WHORK. (25%, 64 Votes)
  • WHLORF. (24%, 61 Votes)
  • Horf. (20%, 52 Votes)
  • HORRRRRRGHGHGHGHG. (18%, 46 Votes)
  • HwwWORff! (16%, 42 Votes)
  • Rrrrraaallllllfffff (15%, 39 Votes)
  • HRRGLORFF. (13%, 33 Votes)
  • huhhyaaak (13%, 33 Votes)
  • horlffph (13%, 33 Votes)
  • HRRRRLLLFFF (11%, 29 Votes)
  • Houuuuuughhhh! (10%, 27 Votes)
  • HUYUKKKK-blatsplat  (10%, 27 Votes)
  • HWORRORHTKHKKKK! (10%, 27 Votes)
  • HURRRRRR! (8%, 21 Votes)
  • Hkkkggghh. (7%, 19 Votes)
  • hmmmmmmarffffgggggg! (7%, 17 Votes)
  • HUORLG. (7%, 17 Votes)
  • rorrfff!!! (6%, 16 Votes)

Total Voters: 258

Loading ... Loading ...
Be Sociable, Share!


Tags:    

10 Comments »

  • Keckler says:

    I just love how demure and ladylike "Horf." is in comparison to everything else here.

  • scout1222 says:

    The other photos on the other polls were nasty, but man did this one give me a gag moment!

  • Yoshi says:

    @Keckler: It's how m'Lady Penelope Worthington-Forth would chuck delicately into a napkin.

  • Elizabeth A says:

    Second time I've voted today… hopefully, my choices in that *other* election will be as popular as the ones I made here!

  • Jen S 1.0 says:

    Okay, so that's tomato soup and…the souls of little orphans? The hell?

    Don't forget your OTHER voting obligations, fellow Nationers!

  • Sandman says:

    @scout, is it that the pot of spew pictured above is apparently being kept optimally warm or that it's thick enough to stand a ladle in?

  • scout1222 says:

    Is that what's sticking out of the crockpot? I didn't even register that part. The color. THE COLOR. I swear I've made that shade come out of me before.

  • Rab01 says:

    The teen-age star trek fan still inside me will forever regret that "Whorf" wasn't one of the choices.

  • Keckler says:

    @Yoshi, totally.

    I don't know what's more disturbing about this onomato-emetic run-off contest: the entrants or the photos.

  • Mer says:

    SpeeYACK isn't perhaps the most accurate of entries, but it's so much fun to say! You're all flashing back to Ren and Stimpy, aren't you? Go ahead, you can admit it.

Leave a comment!

Please familiarize yourself with the Tomato Nation commenting policy before posting.
It is in the FAQ. Thanks, friend.

You can use these tags:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>