The Vine: December 3, 2010
Dear Sars,
I’m hoping that The Nation can help me figure out what to buy my husband for Christmas, because I am stumped. Here’s his biographical sketch:
He’s 45 years old.He likes books, but reads slowly and doesn’t want more books. He loves film, and has a massive list of movies he plans to watch before he dies that has thousands of titles on it, but he does not want to own DVDs (we have Netflix and use streaming from various sources). He dislikes most documentaries, but likes drama and foreign films, raunchy comedies, science fiction and the occasional action flick. He always listens to the commentaries on DVDs and especially likes the Criterion Collection commentaries done by film historians.
He adores our cats. He is reserved, but not shy, and prefers a night in with me to a night out with anyone (including me). He likes architecture, maps, vintage pulp fiction covers, kitsch (like hula girls and tiki gods) and old post cards. He is extremely picky about his clothes, to the point where I am afraid to buy them for him. He is interested in chess and go, but is reclusive enough that he does not want join a chess club or game group. He has a giant brain and easily remembers facts (who the junior Senator from every state is, or what year DC Cab was released, for example).
He works from home and travels a lot for his job. He doesn’t need or want any technological or audio/video devices. He likes the Minnesota Vikings, but isn’t into team gear. He also likes ice hockey, and enjoys going to minor league baseball games. We eat out a lot, so a special dinner out isn’t really a big deal. He does not cook or have any other hobbies.
In the past, we have not had a lot of money, so I could buy him a CD or MP3s or a film reference book and he was happy as a clam. Now he buys those things himself when he wants or needs them. In the past I’ve given him stuff like hand-knit slippers, a beard trimmer, guide books for trips we are planning, a game we could play together (Lost Cities), the 5-disc collector’s edition of Blade Runner, and books like the AIA Guide to New York City, Robert Altman: The Oral Biography, and Lost New York in Old Postcards. He liked these gifts well enough, although he hasn’t watched the movies or read the books (but he did wear the slippers, use the beard trimmer and look at the pictures in the postcard book).
My big idea this year was to buy him/us tickets to a game of our local NHL franchise, but the tickets in my price range for every game for the rest of the season are sold out. I’m crafty, but slow, so I’m open to DIY ideas that don’t take a huge time investment.
We do not have (and do not want) cable TV, so he doesn’t get to see Vikings games very often. I wish there was something like MLB-TV for the NFL, because that would be the perfect gift. The gift does not need to be expensive, but I can spend up to $250. Something free that he liked would be just fine too.
Oh Sars and The Nation — please help! What should I give him for Christmas? I’m totally stuck.
A lucky lady
*****
Sarah,
There are two books from childhood I’m trying to track down:
1) Set in Sausalito, CA, about a girl who winds up living with her aunts (I think aunts), both of whom were ballet dancers. One of them was in an accident on stage and winds up crippled. Two things that stuck with me: the girl rides her bike around Sausalito and reflects that Sausalito is a good name for the town because “it is sort of a saucy town,” and her aunts aren’t very nice to her and she tries to please them by polishing the silver. Also I think “Swan Lake” figures prominently in the book.
2) Set in Seattle, WA, I think. Family with several children live in a fabulous Victorian and some mystery unfolds related to a stained-glass window in their house. Turns out the stained-glass window has a fabulous diamond (or some precious gem) set in it. The kids fight off the bad guy by shooting ammonia into his eyes with their squirt guns.
Can you help?
Meghan
Tags: Ask The Readers popcult winter-holiday agita
Maybe try to get some hockey tickets on craigslist?
Oh or Center Ice, it’s a hockey TV package. (like MLB-TV).
lucky lady – there is something like MLBtv for the NFL – Direct TV has a computer only version of their Sunday Ticket, which lets you watch all out of network games.
Center Ice and Sunday Ticket, I think, both require you to already have a cable package.
@Lucky: If you have wireless Internet in your house or are handy with stringing some cable, how about a Roku? The low-end version is $59.99 and I think it’s sufficient for just about anything anyone would want. You mention Netflix and MLB.TV, and you can watch both of those right on your TV through the Roku. Hulu Plus is also now available, you can rent movies through Amazon Video On Demand, and they just added NHL GameCenter Live, which either has or will soon go(ne) to half-price. There are also a number of other free and premium channels ranging from Pandora Radio to old drive-in movies. I absolutely love mine.
@Lucky: Since he’s into maps, architecture and old postcards, he might appreciate a historical reproduction from a local archives or museum. It shouldn’t be hard to find an old map of your neighbourhood, or the original plans for a building he’s particularly interested in. Frame it up, and it makes a really unique art piece.
(I work in archives, and this technique has served me well with hard-to-shop-for relatives.)
For the stumped wife – maybe think about getting the Apple tv device? It’s $99 & you can stream Netflix with it. Not sure about sports, but you can rent tv shows & movies, too. Caveat: I don’t have one, and don’t think I know anyone who does, so I can’t speak to how well it works. However, I am planning on getting this for my brother & his wife for Christmas, so I’m hopeful! Good luck!
Meghan, #2 must be “The Mystery of the Swan Ballet” by Shyrle Hacker.
Cover art: http://mtdiablowriters.org/ShyrleHacker/swan/swan.htm
Excerpt that has a quote about Sausalito being a saucy town: http://mtdiablowriters.org/ShyrleHacker/swan/swan-1.htm
Whoops, I mean #1! Love the old-style watercolor cover art.
I’m not sure if he’d enjoy this game, but Carcasonne (Amazon link: http://www.amazon.com/Rio-Grande-Games-4098395-Carcassonne/dp/B00005UNAX) had become a game that my bf and I are addicted to. We have the iPhone version, but I’ve been looking at the board game longingly. You build up cities, roads, etc. and mark out your territory. You can play with two or a group, and it’s got expansion packs. Likewise, there’s other historical board games that might be good for an evening in vs. going out…try http://www.boardgamegeek.com
Lucky, do you have a local minor league baseball team? Or, try calling the box office for the NHL franchise and see if there are any last minute seats.
Along these same lines, maybe a satellite radio subscription so he can listen to the his choice of sporting event live on the radio? I know my dad really likes the play-by-play for MLB during the regular season since local teams get the tv time.
Or maybe tickets to the local arthouse cinema? If they have a season ticket concept, maybe that would be a good treat – gets to see foreign and independent films but no DVDs to own.
Hi Meghan,
This isn’t what you’re looking for, but in case you don’t find it and want to read one of the best children’s books of all time, then pick up The Diamond in the Window by Jane Langton: http://tinyurl.com/24bsjyz
In fact, I almost wonder if you’ve conflated another book with this one — an eccentric family with two young children lives in an amazing old Victorian house in Concord, Mass and unravel a mystery (and fight a bad guy) revolving around a window with what looks like a diamond set in it.
Regardless, pick this one up! It’s been a favorite of mine since I first read it twenty years ago, and it does an amazing job of exploring transcendental ideals.
Is there a minor league hockey team near you that you can get tickets for?
Lucky: Do you think he’d like something like an Audible subscription? If he likes books/reading, but doesn’t read very quickly, audiobooks might be a good way for him to reclaim some reading time – particularly if he’s traveling a lot.
Meghan – book #2 might be The Diamond In The Window
http://www.amazon.com/Diamond-Window-Hall-Family-Chronicles/dp/0064400425/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291393241&sr=8-1
Oh no, I hadn’t heard of Roku! Oh dear, now I’m not sure which way to go . . . .
Lucky, is your husband a fan of the site Mental Floss? They have articles about any topic you can think of, and since you mentioned he easily remembers facts, he might enjoy all the trivia. Would he like a subscription to their magazine?
We loooooove our Roku, but if you stream already maybe you don’t need one? It really is the neatest device ever.
@Lucky Lady – if he likes chess and Go, there’s a good chance he’d like some of the following: Blokus/Blokus duo/Blokus Trigon, Othello, Cathedral, Set, Mancala, Settlers of Catan (which has an online version), or Pandemic. I tried to put them in rough order of similarity to chess and Go. Maybe take a look at their descriptions online and see if any of them seem like a good fit?
Meghan: I think the second book might be Jamie and the Mystery Quilt. Single mom with two daughters will sell the old family home to a shady guy unless the older daughter and boy next door can decode clues in an old quilt (that gets stolen along the way) and find the family treasure. I’m linking to the paperback swap copy, since that has a cover picture. http://www.paperbackswap.com/Jamie-Mystery-Quilt-Vicki-Berger-Erwin/book/0590440098/
Lucky: If he’d watch Vikings games not-live, NFL Game Access lets you watch full games on demand. There’s also an audio option, which gives you the live local radio broadcast (so he’d hear Minnesota radio announcers). I think it’s ~$20 each. http://www.nfl.com/gameaccess
Meghan, the second book sounds somewhat like The Diamond in the Window, but it takes place in Concord, MA and I don’t think ammonia is how it ends. http://tinyurl.com/38h8at8
Lucky Lady, are you married to my fiancee? Spooky! (we’re in MN, I’m guessing you are too?)
Here are some ideas I’ve bought/contemplated in the past, maybe one will feel right?
– beer making equipment/class
– vintage fur trapper hat
– vintage watch
– historical print like Stewart mentions above (MN historical society has an amazing search engine) – you could find a historical print of his childhood home or a location that is meaningful to him?
– chocolates (Kitchen Window in Uptown – if you’re close to Mpls – has a great selection of amazing chocolates)
– tickets to a beer tasting event (check mnbeer.com for events)
Good luck!
Does he like “The Big Bang Theory”? I just saw a rock-paper-scissors-lizard-Spock coffee mug at Thinkgeek.com that amuses me to no end.
Wow! I’m Lucky. Thanks for all the great ideas everyone.
@D: We don’t live in MN, but he is from there.
@Stewart and @D: I will look into a historical print or map. That’s a good idea. He has some very old maps of the Middle East. Maybe I will look into getting one framed for him.
@Kerry: I’ve never bought anything off CL before. I’m sort of nervous about it, but I’ll look into it. I wouldn’t have thought to look there.
@Amanda (and others): We have a Roku. We just upgraded to the full-HD version. It’s why we don’t have cable!! We love it.
@Sarah: We do have a minor league baseball team. He doesn’t like to buy tickets ahead of time, he prefers to decide whether to go on the spur of the moment, based on the weather.
Keep the ideas coming! I’m off to look at all the games that have been mentioned.
Lucky doesn’t say is she likes board games or gaming too. Board game geek has excellent recommendations about which games play well with only 2 people or, in the alternative, can be played as a solitaire game. For example, Agricola is a top-rated, complex strategic board game that has a solitaire version of play that some people enjoy, and it plays pretty well with 2 people too.
I’m a center ice subscriber (tv version), and I believe they have an internet-only version of the subscription. I don’t know if same is true of NFL, which tends to be more monopolistic & expensive with Sunday Ticket. Plus, football season is more than half over, hockey season just 25% done. And (forgive me for saying): I don’t know that gifting Vikings fans the opportunity to watch that team this season is a gift. Heh. Sorry, couldn’t resist.
Last, if he likes ice hockey generally, and not just NHL hockey, besides the craigslist idea, surely there is some cool hockey trip or experience you could share that is not the same price as tickets? Whether it is college hockey or minor league or juniors or heading to a hockey hall of game (the US one is in Minnesota a few hours drive from Twin Cities, the “real” one in Toronto) or something that would be interesting?
@elissa: If they’re already streaming on their TV, probably not, but it’s obviously way better than streaming on the computer, plus all the extra stuff. (And yay, I’m not the only one who has one!)
@Liz: In comparison tests, Roku generally comes out on top thanks to affordability and amount of content, but you can read some reviews yourself. Macworld, PCWorld, Tested.com all did three-way reviews alongside Google TV. If your brother is already hardcore into Apple stuff and wants to be able to access his past iTunes purchases on his TV, AppleTV is the way to go. Otherwise, look around, there are a lot of options.
Lucky – Another game option that we love is Ticket to Ride – you build trains on a map, and it comes with either 1800’s America or Europe. Puts vintage maps together with a puzzle style game – my husband and I play it all the time!
Lucky, if you’re in an urban area, perhaps a subscription to a museum or the local Historical Society? The nice thing about museums is that you can go during the day (it’s easier to pry my husband out of the house in daylight hours than after dark) and they sometimes have evening events, such as Seattle Art Museum’s Film Noir series. If you’re lucky enough to live in a big city, you can check out tons of smaller museums and collections–dedicated to everything from the history of flight to serial killers (Happy Holidays!)
Thanks all for identifying the books! The Swan Ballet Mystery is definitely the first (love that cover art, too!) and I guess the second one must be the Diamond in the Window. Not sure where I got the ammonia/Seattle part…that must be some other book….
Lucky, have you considered items to make his travel a bit easier/more enjoyable? My husband is a road warrior and couldn’t do without his noise-cancelling headphones. There are brands out there that are just as good as the Bose ones at half the price. You could buy a GOGO subscription (I think that’s the name of the in-flight wireless many flights have now). That way, he could stream movies from Netflix on the flight. Just a few thoughts. Good luck!
@Katzena/Lucky
Facets Multimedia, a Chicago non-profit cinema and film distributor runs it’s own Netflix-like service:
http://preview.tinyurl.com/cv87v5
The neat thing about Facets is that it focuses on foreign, art-house and other hard to find films which sound slike it might be right in your husband’s wheelhouse.
(Full disclosure: my friend works there)
Lucky – also check out stubhub.com for hockey tickets. You might find it a little more user-friendly and less intimidating than CL, as the transactions run through the site rather than directly with the seller. Good luck!
Lucky,
Would he mind a time lag on the NFL games? If not, nfl.com *do* offer an online option to watch all the games, but only after they’ve been played so he’d have to wait until Monday to watch Sunday games, etc. It’s called Game Rewind – http://www.nfl.com/gameaccess
Good luck!
@Kari: Which brands of headphones are the ones that are just as good as Bose, out of curiosity? I haven’t been willing to drop for the Bose yet…
@Lucky, my friend gets tickets for baseball games on eBay. It’s a little more reliable than Craigslist because you have a “seller rating” that tells you (for the most part) whether a seller is legit. And they have buyer protection insurance too, I think. So I would do eBay over Craigslist for tickets. Lots of good suggestions here!
@Lucky –
I know you said you don’t want any new tech, but if he doesn’t have one, an e-reader is a great (if admittedly kind of pricey) gadget for someone who likes to read, travels a lot, and dislikes clutter, all of which seem to describe your husband. I gave away a hundred books after I got my kindle, and I can read pretty much whatever I want when I’m on the road without having to carry a lot of weight.
Did he like the board games? Because there is a LOT of territory there. Second on Carcassonne and Settlers as good games you both might enjoy. Agricola is also great if he likes the worldbuilding/historical kind of game. Dread Pirate is a fun, vaguely historical pirate themed game. My friends and I also like the simplicity of Ivanhoe and the strategy of Dominion. I assume you already have Trivial Pursuit, but if you don’t, he might enjoy dominating at a trivia game.
Would he enjoy playing video games? Techie again, but if he gets into gaming there are many, many gifts options for the future. There are games that can be played cooperatively, trivia games, and MLB and NHL games for every platform (including PC).
All that said, for somebody who dislikes clutter, I’m all in favor of gifts which are experiences, rather than objects. Movie or play tickets, museum memberships, symbolic/charitable animal adoptions, and subscriptions to streaming services for music or movies all sound good to me.
Matthew Baldwin (whose blog at defectiveyeti.com I find highly amusing) writes an annual “Good Gift Games” article for The Morning News. Here’s the one for 2010: http://www.themorningnews.org/archives/guides/the_2010_good_gift_games.php
He has recommended Carcasonne several times in the past, so maybe some of his other recommendations will seem right.
@Lucky, it seems you are married to the American version of my husband! People with these very specific interests are so hard to buy for, especially when you have to come up with suggestions for what everyone else in the family should get them too…arrgh…
Don’t know if this is any use to you, but we have a general knowledge show on TV here in Britain called QI chaired by Stephen Fry (who is very brainy indeed) which is funny and always useful for learning esoteric facts to amaze people with. There are DVDs and also a couple of books of quotations and facts, below (which someone who reads slowly might enjoy dipping into).
http://www.amazon.com/QI-Advanced-Banter-Stephen-Fry/dp/0571233724/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291403120&sr=8-1
http://www.amazon.com/Book-General-Ignorance-John-Mitchinson/dp/0307394913/ref=pd_sim_b_1
Also I don’t know how far you are from the NHL arena but I once needed hockey tickets (for work) and I just went down to the arena on a game night and talked to the scalpers, telling them what dates/price ranges I wanted. I got some business cards from them and found one with tickets in the section I wanted. The guy I used even dropped them off to me. Again, scalpers aren’t always legit but in general the professional ones have a reputation to uphold.
@Lucky – I’m agreeing with @Lulu. An eReader is a GREAT idea for a reader who travels a lot. Why didn’t I think of that? I LOVE my nook. I think the Wi-Fi only version is $150 now? And I thought I saw Best Buy selling it for $100? Kindles are comparably priced. They are totally easy to use, and it’s so convenient to have. Throw in some gift cards to the bookstore (remember, Kindle is Amazon only; nook, Kobo and Sony eReader work with books from most places other than Amazon.)
Also, seconding the “make travel more pleasant” recommendation of noise cancelling headphones. Check Consumer Reports and a few other places, but I think Panasonic makes a pair that are comparable to the wildly expensive Bose, for like…$50. That plus an eReader would make for a pretty great gift.
@Lucky ~
“No books” + “loves our cats” = I can’t resist but to recommend one of my fave books of all time, The Silent Miaow.
A nice coffee table read, not something you have to plow through cover to cover but a manual, written by a cat, on how to adopt a family. It’s precious and should be required reading for any cat lover or lover of cat lovers. Good luck!
I’m sorry that I don’t have many suggestions for Lucky, but I wanted to thank her for posing the question because a lot of the responses here would also be awesome gift ideas for my husband.
I will say that my husband has often been the most fond of “experience” gifts and of gifts that we can share in some way.
Also, this might sound strange, buy I got my husband a one-hour massage as a gift once and that worked out really well. If your husband travels a lot, a spa massage after a long flight might be appreciated. My husband admitted that he felt weird going to the appointment, but as soon as the massage started he was all for it. Then again, my boy has back problems, so YMMV.
Meghan – I think the book you confused with The Diamond in the Window is probably Go To the Room of the Eyes by Betty K. Erwin. It’s set in a large Edwardian home in Seattle. I can’t find a good plot description, but I remember the ammonia in the water guns.
Also, you might like Secret Of The Seven Crows by Wylly St. John. It’s another YA mystery set in a cool old house.
@RC: We’ve used a couple different brands. I first bought Jabra C820s (several years ago) for myself, and my husband loved them so much he took them from me. One little piece of plastic came off them, but it was due to an accidental twisting on my part. With a little tape, there was no harm done, and they still work just as well today.
I later figured I’d get another pair, so we could both use them, and ordered 2 pairs (just in case) of Able Planet NC500SC Noise Canceling Headphones. These work about as well, though I probably prefer the Jabras only very slightly in sound quality but more so in ear comfort. Both are ear-surrounding models, but the Able Planets are a little bit smaller, and tend to make my ears sore after extended wear. YMMV.
I paid $60 for all pairs, at woot. Reviews on both were fairly good. Good luck in your search! I agree that Bose is a little exorbitant.
@Lucky, you definitely want to go with Stubhub over Craigslist if you’re looking for hockey tickets. Stubhub guarantees the tickets, while if you get a scammer on Craiglist you’re out of luck.
@Lucky – something that I don’t think has been covered yet is the kitsch + film area. The site http://www.EntertainmentEarth.com has a wide variety of kitchsy stuff related to films and television, and do not be put off by the fact that Star Wars and Star Trek are the first two categories. They have stuff for films you would not expect to have stuff, like the Godfather bobbleheads they’re featuring today.
Lucky –
May I second the games suggestions. I got on to suggest Settlers of Cattan and Carcasonne, both of which my chess-loving hermit enjoys.
Another game that’s proved to be a winner is Pentago, it’s a very simple yet incredibly difficult strategic game for two players. Try and get the nice wooden set if you can.
Lucky:
When you mentioned postcards, my mind instantly went to the PostSecret books ( http://postsecret.com ). These are *not* old/historic postcards, but check out the site for a sampling to see if this is the kind of thing he’d be into.
Lucky again — thanks so much for all the great gift ideas. I think I’m settled on Ticket to Ride and an old map he will enjoy (and maybe a Metropolis Robot Maria Bobblehead as a stocking stuffer!). I’ve made a list of all the other ideas that I’m going to keep for the future. I really, really appreciate all the ideas.
OMG! In addition to Settlers and Carcasonne, take a look at the card game “Dominion.” It’s kind of like Magic, the Gathering, only you don’t have to buy different cards. One deck is all you purchase! (although there are expansions, like in Settlers.) It’s a great two-player game!
Lucky–
Check out Eurorails. It’s a complex board game that takes literally hours to play (my boyfriend and I lose whole days this way), which strikes me as something that might be right up your fellow’s alley. You can have discussions about why the pig tokens don’t have eyes while crushing each other’s dreams of world domination!