Print it out and post it over your desk. Forward it to a friend. Hand it out to your class. You don’t need my permission; you don’t even have to credit me. Same with this one; if you need it, use it. Permission granted ad infinitum.

Get a dictionary — a real full-sized one, not a pocket edition.

Get a copy of the Garner.

Do not run spell-check on auto; take the time to look at each flagged error individually. “I see know reason to” is incorrect and irritating.

Thanks to everyone who contributed usage peeves! If you see any typos, let me know pronto. Now, let’s get started.

——————-

ad nauseam
NOT “ad nauseum.” I can explain why this is the case, but the interest/effort ratio isn’t great, so: just trust me.

adverse/averse
“I’m not averse to the idea.” NOT “adverse.”

alcohol
NOT “alchohol.”

“AM in the morning”
Redundant. “AM” means “ante meridian” — before noon. It means morning. You can stop there.

Barnes & Noble
NOT “Barnes & Nobles” — I will, however, accept “Bones & Narble,” because it sounds funny.

bawled
NOT “balled,” as in “I balled my eyes out” — maybe you did, and I don’t judge you, but if you meant that you were crying, not…so much.

bear with me
NOT “bare with me.”

begs the question
Not synonymous with “raises the question.” I’ll let these dinosaurs explain further.

believe
NOT “beleive.”

between you and me
“Between” is a preposition; it requires an objective pronoun. “I” is never indicated here.

Blues Traveler
NOT “Blues Travelers.” If anyone still cares about this band.

calendar
NOT “calender.”

Caribbean
NOT “Carribean.”

cliché/clichéd
“That’s so clichéd,” NOT “that’s so cliché.” “Clichéd” is the adjective; “cliché” is the noun.

commercial
NOT “commerical.”

composed/comprised
I regret to inform the many readers who wrote in to complain about this one that “comprised of” is not incorrect. You may wish to use a synonym like “composed of” instead, to avoid controversy, but the acceptability of “is comprised of” is not recent.

congratulations
NOT “congradulations.”

consistent
NOT “consistant.”

contact/meet with
NOT “liaise with.”

coop/co-op
To distinguish between the shortened version of “cooperative” and the place where hens hang out, please use a hyphen.

desert/dessert
One has oases; the other has chocolate sauce. “Just desserts” is a cute cooking pun, but if you mean “comeuppance,” ditch the extra S.

devastated
NOT “devestated.”

discreet/discrete
If you divide something into distinct, separate, non-continuous sections, those sections are discrete, NOT discreet, which means “prudent” or “unobtrusive.”

“dos and don’ts”
NOT, for the love of all that is holy, “do’s and don’t’s.” “Don’t” is a contraction, and as such requires an apostrophe; it’s the only apostrophe you should have going in that phrase.

e.g./i.e.
e.g. = “for example.” i.e. = “that is.”

embarrassed
NOT “embarassed” or “embarressed.”

etc.
NOT “etc” (you must use a period after it, even if it falls in the middle of a sentence; it’s an abbreviation), or “ect.” Just write out “et cetera”; it looks nicer and more formal, and then you don’t have to worry about this stuff.

faze/phase
The word is “unfazed,” NOT “unphased,” unless you’re making some kind of Star Trek reference.

feel bad (for)
You do not “feel badly for” someone. This is an overcorrection.

fifth wheel
NOT “third wheel.” For those of you fortunate enough to have avoided my repeated fulminations on this topic in the Dawson’s Creek recaps, here’s the deal: a third wheel can serve a purpose; it is not by definition extraneous. A fifth wheel, however, is entirely extraneous; because that is what this expression aims to convey, “fifth wheel” is the correct usage. NOT “THIRD WHEEL.” HATE.

fluorescent
NOT “flourescent” or “florescent” (the latter is permissible if it pertains to botany, or the period during which an artist was active — but if you follow it with the word “bulbs,” it’s wrong).

harass/harassment
NOT “harrass/harrassment.”

having a dialogue/discussing
NOT the odious “dialoguing.”

hoard/horde
A hoard is a stash; a horde is an army, often of barbarians.

hung/hanged
Decorations get hung; people get hanged. Not everyone will insist on this distinction, but precision is important.

imply/infer
Meaning is implied by the speaker and inferred by the listener. If I imply that I can’t come to your party, you infer that I have other plans.

give [x] an incentive
I will permit “incentivize.” “Incent” is, as a verb, appalling.

I couldn’t care less
NOT “I could care less.” Tolerable in fictional dialogue if used knowledgeably as a point of character development; otherwise, objectionable.

impactful
Ew. Also, no.

independent
NOT “independant.”

in lieu of/in light of
“In lieu of” means “instead of” or “in place of.” “In light of” means “given” or “because.” DO NOT spell it “in loo of.”

irresistible
NOT “irresistable.”

Jeffrey
The name is not usually spelled “Jeffery.” A person’s name is an important signifier of identity; respect that, and get it right.

kit and caboodle
NOT “kitten caboodle.” One of the Bunting family cats got her name from this expression, but we did in fact know that the phrase just sounds like “kitten caboodle.” A caboodle is a lot or a collection; once you know that, remembering that it’s “the whole kit and caboodle” is easier, because it just makes more sense in its correct form.

lightning
NOT “lightening.”

literally
“I literally had, like, ten thousand beers.” I’m pretty sure you didn’t; the use of the word “like” signals to me that we’re actually speaking figuratively. I understand why people use it incorrectly — it’s a form of hyperbole — but I’m more irritated by the overuse at this point than by the misuse. Keep an eye on it.

loath/loathe
“Loath” is the adjective. “I am loath to offend my in-laws.” “Loathe” is the verb. “I loathe my in-laws.”

misspelled
NOT “mispelled.”

moot point
NOT “mute point.”

nonplussed
This word DOES NOT mean “unimpressed.” It means “at a loss” or “taken aback.” It does not mean anything at all if you do not spell it with two Ss.

no one
Two words, yo. NOT “noone” or “no-one.”

peak/peek
“Peak” = pinnacle. “Peek” = look furtively.

pique
The expression is NOT “a fit of peak” or “it peeked my interest.”

poring/pouring
You do not “pour over” a document. You “pore over” it.

The reason is because
No “because.” “The reason is” gets that work done for you.

receive
NOT “recieve.”

reign/rein
“To reign” is to rule. “To rein (in)” is to steer or hold back. When riding a horse, you do not “hold the reigns”; you do not “reign in” a discussion; there is no such thing as a “rein of terror.” (Or, for that matter, a “rain of terror.”)

rogue/rouge
One is a troublemaker; the other is a color.

schedule
NOT “schedual.” Americans should not pronounce it “shed-yool” unironically.

shoo-in
NOT “shoe-in.” The expression derives from the act of shooing. Don’t forget the hyphen.

the subjunctive mood
If I were you, I would check out this article.

supposedly
NOT “supposably.”

tack/tact
You try a different tack (angle or direction), NOT a different tact.

think outside the box
Suggests an utter inability to do so. Unacceptable. If what you want from your team is an unconventional, creative approach to problem-solving, say so.

this kind of/these kinds of
NOT “these kind of.” Noun-modifier agreement: it’s what’s for dinner.

try and/try to
“Try and” is incorrect. You can certainly use it in colloquial dialogue, but it’s properly “try to.” “I’m going to try to find a parking spot.” “Could you try to keep your voice down?” The verb form there is an infinitive; it needs its “to.”

wary/weary
Don’t confuse “wary of” and/or “leery of” with “weary of.” “Wary” and “leery” mean more or less the same thing: cautious. “Weary” means “tired.” You are not weary of hiring a candidate with no experience; you are wary or leery of it.

y’all
NOT “ya’ll.”

October 2, 2006

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