Ah, the open road. Americans love to say that phrase: “Ah, the open road.” Americans love the idea of the open road; we love Jack Kerouac, we love Route 66, and we love it when …

I try to avoid making new year’s resolutions. I just can’t cope with instituting major changes on the very first day of the year. Nothing bites harder than waking up with a malignant hangover on …

I spent New Year’s Day recuperating with a few of my favorite things: Bloody Marys, good friends, gossip, delicious pasta, and mind-numbingly bad film. The Biscuit and I, having downed enough room-temperature champagne and stayed …

I used to work at a store in the Short Hills Mall called Cheers! (Not my exclamation point, just for the record.) Similar to a Hallmark store, but independently owned, Cheers! sold cards, wrapping paper, …

This past weekend, the Biscuit and his friend Mr. Osbourne and I visited the Museum of Bad Art (also known as the MoBA) in Dedham, Massachusetts. The trip out to Dedham turned into a minor …

For the last week or so, New York City has enjoyed unseasonably
balmy weather, and I like warm sunny days as much as the next person, but I want it to get cold again. I can’t …

Dear Santa,
I know that you receive millions of letters every year, but perhaps mine will catch your eye. Please forgive me for failing to observe correct letter-to-Santa protocol; I couldn’t find a red crayon. I …

This Tuesday, I get the entire day off in order to vote. This might sound ridiculous in light of the fact that, even in a Presidential election year, voting takes the average citizen a grand …

Here in New York City, we have a so-called humor publication called The Rotten Apple. TRA models itself on (read: rips off without much success) magazines like The Onion and the Lampoon, but between the …

Hobey, Warrior Feline
The occupants of the ninth floor lead tranquil lives, until an unmistakable jingling sound heralds the approach of pure evil, and the long shadow of terror falls over their happy hallway. Fuzzy Mousie …