Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

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Articles by Sarah D. Bunting

The Vine: November 9, 2004
November 9, 2004 – 7:45 PM | No Comment

Dear Sars,
I’m in Indiana, so I feel dicked every which way I look.And when I woke up at 12:30 last night and checked the returns and saw that Ohio was going to Bush I cried …

Girls’ Bike Club V: Then Go Away
November 8, 2004 – 9:25 AM | No Comment

Wing Chun: AAAAAAAAARRRRGGH!
Sarah: AAAAGGHHHH!
Wing Chun: RRRRRRRRR!
Sarah: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Wing Chun: WAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Sarah: UUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHH!
Wing Chun: NOT!
Sarah: I KNOW!
Wing Chun: FUCK!
Sarah: SHIT!
Wing Chun: ASS! ASSHEAD!
Sarah: FUCKING…FUCKER!
Wing Chun: HATE!
Sarah: HATEY HATE!
Wing Chun and Sarah: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE!
Wing Chun: I CAN’T STOP SCREAMING!
Sarah: ME …

The Vine: November 5, 2004
November 5, 2004 – 6:34 PM | No Comment

Dear Sars:
Can you help me find a couple of programs to which I can donate some books?
They’re in good condition, but eclectic in topic, to say the least. Most of
the programs I’ve seen want you …

The Vine: November 4, 2004
November 4, 2004 – 10:16 PM | No Comment

Dear Sars,
The letters over the past couple of weeks have made me want to ask a baseball expert a question that I’ve been thinking about for a long while now.And please, let me be clear …

The Vine: November 3, 2004
November 3, 2004 – 3:17 PM | No Comment

Sars,
The Vine letter from “Take My Blood, Please” is correct. A male is
ineligible to donate blood if he has had sex with another male since
1977, even once. A bunch of other populations are also considered
to …

Scary Stories
November 1, 2004 – 9:25 AM | No Comment

I didn’t have Halloween plans yesterday — or, more precisely, I had plans yesterday, but not of the Halloween variety. I’d gone to Bean’s legendary Halloween fete the night before, kitted out as Zombie Jackie …

The Vine: October 28, 2004
October 28, 2004 – 7:55 PM | No Comment

Hey Sars,
Far be it from me to suggest anything that favors Dubya, but your response
regarding the Electoral College skipped over the one thing that I feel comes
most closely to justifying its existence.Were we to rely …

The Vine: October 27, 2004
October 27, 2004 – 7:48 PM | No Comment

Dear Sars,
I have a suggestion for BHL, who was asking for ways to help her favorite
causes.The Cancer Council of Australia had “Night In” week last week, the
idea being that you get a group of people …

The Vine: October 26, 2004
October 26, 2004 – 7:44 PM | No Comment

And now, BSD on The Curse…

Dear Cupped Candles,
“The Curse.”Ahhhh, two words I hope to never hear again by the end of this weekend.As to what it is, there’s really no official definition to what it.I …

The Subheroes Chapter 9: Right Direction
October 25, 2004 – 9:24 AM | No Comment

Shelley comes out into the front office, glances into the cabinet, and snaps her fingers lightly. Olivia: “[Eyebrows?]” Shelley: “[Head flick.]” Olivia gets up and follows Shelley into the back office. She looks over her …