Men irritate the hell out of me sometimes – for instance, the times I hang out with men, and the conversation turns to injuries we have sustained, and after we run through the usual broken …

Ah, the open road. Americans love to say that phrase: “Ah, the open road.” Americans love the idea of the open road; we love Jack Kerouac, we love Route 66, and we love it when …

I try to avoid making new year’s resolutions. I just can’t cope with instituting major changes on the very first day of the year. Nothing bites harder than waking up with a malignant hangover on …

I spent New Year’s Day recuperating with a few of my favorite things: Bloody Marys, good friends, gossip, delicious pasta, and mind-numbingly bad film. The Biscuit and I, having downed enough room-temperature champagne and stayed …

I used to work at a store in the Short Hills Mall called Cheers! (Not my exclamation point, just for the record.) Similar to a Hallmark store, but independently owned, Cheers! sold cards, wrapping paper, …

This past weekend, the Biscuit and his friend Mr. Osbourne and I visited the Museum of Bad Art (also known as the MoBA) in Dedham, Massachusetts. The trip out to Dedham turned into a minor …

For the last week or so, New York City has enjoyed unseasonably
balmy weather, and I like warm sunny days as much as the next person, but I want it to get cold again. I can’t …

Dear Santa,
I know that you receive millions of letters every year, but perhaps mine will catch your eye. Please forgive me for failing to observe correct letter-to-Santa protocol; I couldn’t find a red crayon. I …

This Tuesday, I get the entire day off in order to vote. This might sound ridiculous in light of the fact that, even in a Presidential election year, voting takes the average citizen a grand …

Here in New York City, we have a so-called humor publication called The Rotten Apple. TRA models itself on (read: rips off without much success) magazines like The Onion and the Lampoon, but between the …