The Vine: July 25, 2006
I think the biggest thing you can do for an intern is to give them structured, balanced (some good/some negative) feedback. The ability to use both types of information to improve your work performance will be a huge leg up in the workplace, and it’s a hard thing to get used to –- start them early!
AF
Other reader suggestions for mentoring interns appear below:
(for interns)
If you’re going to call in late/hungover, don’t bother
Ask questions
(for interns’ bosses)
Give them freebies to make up for the crappy pay
Let them sit in on high-level meetings*
Let them “meet the talent,” if it’s relevant
Don’t send them out for coffee or do menial tasks you wouldn’t do yourself
Treat them with respect generally (you never know if you’re going to end up working for them one day)
Socialize with them outside of work/give them networking and/or lunch opportunities*
Take an interest in/advise on their outside projects
Have enough for the intern to do*
If they’re there for a specific field or task, don’t farm them out to other departments
Make it clear you’re available for questions and guidance, but don’t micro-manage — they can’t learn anything that way
Sit down the first day and review office-culture expectations — dress code, promptness, how the phones get answered, length of the lunch break
Set up a summer-length project they can work towards completing
Ask colleagues to let the intern shadow them for a day
Make sure they understand they will be doing some scut work, but that they understand why it needs doing*
Explain what the company/office does; give some context for both the intern’s job and yours
Tell the intern your experiences at his/her age — especially the bad stuff*
Stay in touch so you can provide a recommendation/support
Give regular, detailed feedback*
Do not sugarcoat said feedback
Suggestions I received more than once have an asterisk.
I would say that the last two on the list are probably the most important. It’s easy to assume that your interns have some job experience, or know what’s expected of them, but even if the intern’s been holding down jobs since she was eleven, like I had been, every office’s (and industry’s) culture is different, and most people respond better to clear structure.
Hey Sars,
I love The Vine, and I hope you don’t mind that I’m writing in to disagree with your response to “Bridezilla” today. It seemed to me that there were a lot of red flags in that email about the writer’s mother:
Ever since Polly has cheated on my brother, my mother has not forgiven her and has been quite cold to her.
These facts have been masked to everyone, except my mother (a case of woman’s intuition, I think), until recently.
my mother had suggested that I sing at the wedding as well
my mom asked my brother if Polly could wait until then because we were going to go to the store where she was going to order the dresses from.
my mother takes it upon herself to reply to Polly in a civil manner, and through this, EVERY SINGLE THING that my mother hates about Polly and Polly hates about my mother and family comes out in a week-long email battle.
Assuming the writer is a voting adult, it does seem strange to me that her mother is so involved in the issues between the bride and the bridesmaids…not to mention the fact that it seems very rude to hold a grudge against her son’s girlfriend for the cheating when he has forgiven her (let alone to not have the decency to keep that grudge to herself). This may not change your advice, of course (I agree that an ultimatum is probably not productive here) — but it does seem like the problem may not be 100% on Polly’s side, but may have something to do with an overly controlling mother.
Not That It’s My Business Any More Than Her Mother’s
Dear Or Mine, But Here We All Are,
I got several letters pointing this out, and I have to say, I really didn’t notice this aspect of the author’s mother in the original letter. Not sure why that is. Probably because I wasn’t looking for it in a letter coming from the groom’s sister.
My advice on the narrow point is, I think, still right. I don’t think either side wants it to get to a formal declaration of war, which is what an ultimatum would be. But you’re also right that the author’s mom is probably taking too large (and resentful) a role here — she doesn’t want the brother to grow up, so she’s throwing her weight around so the bride knows she’s the low man on the totem pole.
Unattractive and counterproductive, but it happens alllll the time…and it seems to me, on second reading, like the groom needs to grow a harder backbone and start telling everyone involved to take it down a notch. The relationship history would indicate that this is not a strong suit of his, but still.
Anyway, short form: yes, you’re probably right.
Hi Sars,
This isn’t an advice question, just a question of curiosity. What do you think of the way Alex Rodriguez is getting treated by Yankee fans? We don’t generally boo players in Baltimore unless they’ve really earned our vitriol (Sidney Ponson, I’m looking at you), so maybe I just don’t get it. Obviously the mindset is different in New York, where anything less than a ring is considered failure, but it still seems to me as though A-Rod is getting more than his fair share of abuse.
Are fans just frustrated with the injuries in the outfield and the starting pitching woes, so they take it out on A-Rod? Or do they really hate him that much? Yeah, he’s had his share of troubles this year, but is he getting booed because of the troubles? Or are the troubles a result of the booing? I guess I just don’t understand, but it totally bums me out to hear 50,000 people booing one of the greatest players of our generation.
Thanks for your insight,
A Baltimore Baseball Fan
Dear Bawlmer,
There’s a lot I don’t like about it — starting, since you asked, with “by Yankee fans.” Because we’re not all doing that, just like we’re not all in the “anything less than a ring is considered failure” mindset. Can you find that sort of black-and-white, blunt-force thinking in the bleachers, right before they cut off beer sales? Sure. But the majority of Yankee fans are fans of the game, too, whose partisanship does still allow for considered discussion.
The reason I mention all of that is that it ties into what I see as a major issue with this story — to wit, that it’s a non-story that’s taken on this vicious-cycle life of its own. I think you have a few hundred people booing, I think crowd psychology leads to another thousand or so joining them, I think the local press decides to write that up as “the Stadium faithful” coming down on A-Rod even though it’s not everyone at the game, John Kruk clucks about it on Baseball Tonight, the sports blogosphere picks it up on a national level, and then it’s just this tornado of talk-radio blustering about clutch stats and fielding range that is only tangentially related to the facts.
And the facts, as I see them, are that the Yanks had some terrible luck with key hitters getting injured; that Randy Johnson is, like it or not, old, and can’t be the ace of this staff or any other in 2006; that our starters, with the exception of Moose, can’t hold the line long enough, and it’s exhausting the bullpen; and that A-Rod is maybe overthinking a little bit, and pressing, and feeling sorry for himself.
And maybe I’m wrong, but I have a feeling that the fans smell that, and turn on him. Compare this to Giambi getting booed last year. The booing stopped by May, despite the fact that Hambone was stinking up the joint with an interstate batting average and refusing to work his shit out in the minors. But he was also taking a “…duly noted, let’s go to work” attitude towards the catcalls, and I think the attitude in the cheap seats may have been, “Well, we can’t break him, so…fuck it.”
I think A-Rod needs to be respected and liked maybe a little too much. I think he wants us to treat him better, and I think he doesn’t get that, in New York, when you’re coming onto a team with this much history, it doesn’t work like that…that you’re never going to be the best in the history of the franchise when the franchise includes the Babe and Mickey Mantle and Reg-gie!. Jeter’s sainted treatment in the media is a bit much, and I bet Jeter would tell you the same thing over a Guinness, but Jeter didn’t show up here expecting to a place in the pantheon. Neither did Sheffield, for that matter. And the fans like Sheff, as a rule, more than they like A-Rod, and Sheff is not Mr. Warmth.
Love it or hate it, this team is a storied franchise, and I think A-Rod’s 1) using it to try to cop a ring for himself and 2) acting like he was here to do it a favor really is not popular with some people. I can totally see where he’s coming from, he wants to achieve and that’s fine, good for him — but there’s a reason we liked Scott Brosius, who will only get into the Hall by paying the admission, and don’t respond as much to A-Rod. Brosius was just happy to be here. And you don’t have to be nice or retiring or bowing-scraping grateful, either — Sheffield isn’t, Reggie sure wasn’t — but the context here is a little different from what it is in Texas or Seattle. You don’t have to be on board with that, but if you’re going to play here, you have to contend with it and understand where the fans are coming from with it, and if you need your hand held, that’s not going to work.
It’s not about the winning or the losing, for most of us, or even about whether he’s slumping. That shit’s going to happen. It’s not that he has no sense of the history of the team, or doesn’t respect it — I think he does, that’s why he’s here. But there is something about his attitude and his perspective that…you know, we want to like him, but I think he got a rep as being a little bit whiny about this stuff, and…end of story, for a lot of the fans.
[7/25/06]
Tags: Ask The Readers boys (and girls) etiquette the fam writing
