The N Candy AA: Get ready for Mars Madness
Submitted by Sarah D. Bunting on March 18, 2010 – 1:25 PM70 Comments
Empty calories! Barely-civil debate! Violations of sampler etiquette! Numerous puns about nut clusters, each more immature than the last!
That’s right, other people who care way too much about ranking snacks: The N Candy AA, Part 1: Hee Hee, You Said “Mounds” is coming soon. Keckler is back, and she’s “making” me eat all the banana candy (hee hee, “banana candy”) so put your dentists on speed-dial and let’s do this thing.
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Tags: food Keckler N Candy AA
Can I get some love for the little red perfection that is the Swedish Fish? I have a cannister of them on my desk that needs to be refilled every week. If it’s empty, the pouting of my co-workers is legen-wait for it-dary.
A college friend ate an entire bag (12 ounces) of circus peanuts, in one sitting, on a dare. I’ve never seen a face so full of nausea and regret as his that day. And for several days after.
Go Reese’s Cups! Go Reese’s Cups!
Is this going to be like the others where something boooooring wins like M&Ms? Personally, I have never been able to turn down a Twix.
Airheads and Tangy Taffy for the pure-sugar/nostalgia factor. But Reese’s cups might be the big winner here, too. (In honor of Easter, I just had one…ok, FOUR Reese’s eggs. So, so good.)
Oooh, what about the haribo coca-cola flavored gummies? I can eat an entire bag full of those things in about 5 minutes flat.
I have been killing some dark chocolate Reese’s cups lately. But I have to put my oar in for old-fashioned pillow mints, Haribo strawberry puffs, and Charleston Chew (my go-to movie snack.)
Having been drowning myself in classic Doctor Who for the past month, I want to ask The Nation’s Brits if Jellybabies are as good as I’ve heard. I’ve never had them. I used to think it was the Brit version of Jellybeans, but apparently I’m wrong. They seem to be a sort of cross between gummy bears and gum drops. I think. I need to see if there’s a way to order them online from the UK.
My nominations…gummy bears (and/or worms), gum drops, Brach’s caramels (no other compares), and tootsie rolls. Staples of my childhood.
@tulip: A lightning-quick Googling suggests I least spelled it right. Here’s one source: http://tinyurl.com/yh69aq6
Heh: as I was converting this to tinyurl form, I mis-typed the address as “tinyURP,” which is, I suppose, appropriate to the theme.
I must agree that banana flavouring is unutterably vile.
And I’m just old enough that the grim (howsoever unlikely) spectre of EXPLOSIVE DEATH CANDY! lingers over Pop Rocks from those whispered lunch room conversations about This One Kid everyone had heard about but no one knew. I also have a vague disquiet about Mikey from the Life commercial that no amount of “online research” (read “rumour wrangling via Google”) can entirely dispel. Steve Almond’s book may have roused some old ghosts for me. Possibly.
Can I just say that whatever wonderful else goes on here – DC challenges, pet rescue, advice to the careworn and grammar-bemused (and tomato-soup thievin’), criticism on culture high, low, and in-between, miracles of book-finding and -sharing – the times I know I’ve truly found my people are these highly coloured, sugar-smeared N-[insert thing one is never too old to care about to an irrational degree]-AAs.
Also: “… my grandmother will be able to outdistance me in a closet” is a little bit of deliciousness in itself. Thank you, Jaybird.
IMHO, Jellybabies = nasty.
Oh, HELL YEAH. Reese’s Peanut Butter cups FTW! I love lots of different candy, but if I were forced to choose (oh no!) it’s Reese’s all the way. Except these newfangled dark chocolate ones. There’s something wonky with the chocolate and it’s very plastic. Makes a body sad, it does.
Hee, you’re welcome, Sandman.
Whatever happens in the NCandyAA, I have a deep and abiding need to see Skittles go down. You look at Skittles, your mouth gets all ready for M&Ms, and then you get the bastard inbred paste-eating cousin of Starburst. Phleh.
@cayenne: “Ewww, black licorice & necco wafers, punishment foods from the third circle of hell.”
Well put.
And add those awful candy buttons stuck on paper to that list.
Cadbury eggs? You mean that chocolate covered SNOT? No thank you.
If anyone has banana-flavored Wacky Wafers, though, sign me up!
Are there any plans for a “Who THOUGHT of this?!?” bracket? Because the candy-buttons-on-paper and the circus peanuts belong on the “Satan’s Grandma Had These in Her Purse” list, while the wax bottles of sugar water and Reese’s Cups should probably be on the “And the Lord Didst Grin” side.
Then again, I ain’t drivin’ this truck, so it’s cool.
@Sandman – I’m not sure if I love you or hate you for that link. I haven’t had stroopwafels in YEARS and now the craving is killing me. Ditto for the salty black licorice.
I used to haaate black licorice, until I tried the salty kind which is alarmingly addictive. It’s great because no one ever raids your candy jar (at least not twice). Plus, you have to love any candy that comes with a warning label that excessive use can cause bowel distress.
I think I might have to enlist my whole office in this … we can vote each day. On the other hand, I’ve already learned that I have to keep the Fishbowl O Candy off the conference table during staff meetings (the transition from mania to flatlining is amusing, at least.)
I have a weird attraction to Circus Peanuts … but actually eating one or two is always enough to snap me back to “What Was I THINKING?” I like the 50 cent bags of random candy they sell at the deli near me (I like the toffee most of all); but I really love finding any place that sells old-style candy that you don’t see every day.
I was once working on a project with a woman from Australia; when she came here, she brought a box of different candies & cookies that I’d never seen. We used to trade off trying each others’ favorites. She’d never had an Oreo (but it was similar to an Australian cookie that I can’t recall now.) The Australian candy was amazing — a real variety of stuff. I had her try some US sodas that she’d never had — chiefly root beer (which she hated and described as cough medicine) and Dr. Pepper (which she liked.)
Can’t wait for the N Candy AA to get rolling.
Does no one else like Coffee Nips? I mean sure they’ll pry the crown right off your molars, (which totally happend to my dad the year I was 12) but my Grandma always put them in my stocking. Yay Coffee Nips!
@Emma: Sorry. Sometimes I’m a bad influence. There’s a giant candy store around the corner from me that sells schoolkrijter, among other things, in bulk . I can see myself making too many trips there before the NC Double Dental Coverage is over.
“It’s great because no one ever raids your candy jar (at least not twice).”
Snerk. Look at you, with your candy for the unwary!
That reminds me of an episode of Malcolm in the Middle, in which the eldest brother ate 100 Peeps on a dare, with predictably dire consequences for his health.
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