The Tomato Nation Fall Contest: Preview
Not exactly what I have in mind…
It’s baaaaaaaack!
A year and a half ago, you wonderful, helpful, smart, generous, sweet-smelling, tasteful, education-minded people raised $30,000 for DonorsChoose and invited me to shave my head. Now it’s time to do it again.
Not the head-shaving. I’ve selected a different sort of humiliation this time. But the price of said humiliation has gone up.
Last time around, you raised 30K in eight days. Just take a minute and congratulate yourselves on your awesomeness. …Ready to continue? Great. So, the good news is that the ’07 contest will give you a whole month to raise the money. A niiiiice long 31-dayer, too: all of October.
The bad news is that I want you to raise more money this time.
The initial goal for ’07: $35,000.
It’s actually good news for kids around the country, if we can do it. I bet we can. I bet we can raise even more than that. And if we do raise more than that — if we can raise $40,000 in the goal period — I have to find a tomato costume, put it on, and wear it all day.
I don’t mean some wear-a-red-outfit-with-a-green-hat, only-go-outside-to-buy-milk bullshit either. I mean a big old spherical tomato-mascot rig, red tights, foam leaf hat, the whole bit — on the subway. To Rockefeller Center. Where I work, on the same floor as Saturday Night Live, 50 feet away from the president of Bravo. And then out for lunch, where I will pause to perform the post-kiss Angela dance from My So-Called Life in the plaza. And then back to work. And then out for a drink.
And I will film it.
I’ve worn mascot gear before. It sucks. Trying to get into a bathroom stall sucks, trying to walk sucks…the D train at rush hour already sucks, try standing the whole way while dressed as a giant salad ingredient. Also: tomato costumes? Expensive. Like, $500. Slutty nurse gear, no problem, $29.99. A tomato, you have to special-order the damn thing from England.
But if we can raise forty grand, I will do it. I will dress as a giant tomato, I will dance around, Andy Samberg will point and laugh, and I will show you the sad results on YouTube.
You don’t have to stop at 40K, of course. You can keep raising money until the end of the goal period, even if you’ve already triggered the My So-Called Tomato fun times — and you should keep going, because if you raise more than 40K, I will match every dollar over $40,000 until we hit $50,000.
…Let’s review.
The initial goal: $35,000. TomatoThon goal: $40,000. Every dollar over $40,000, matched by me to $50,000.
And! You can win prizes! Current prizing includes, but is in no way limited to:
A sleeve of Embittermints
A gift basket of Frasier Fir products from the Thymes
Glarkware
NBC/Bravo branded loot
Themed book packs from Pocket Books
Library-/book-themed merch from Girl-ish Things
Gift certificates from Amazon, Brooklyn Industries
Copies of the TWoP book
Prizes will keep coming in, so stay tuned.
The contest begins October 1.
In the meantime, I need your help, in the following four ways.
1. Please head over to DonorsChoose.org and have a look at the available projects, then pick as many as three (3) and email me your suggestions. I’m open to projects all over the country, of all different types. If you see something that looks fun or meaningful or challenging, send it along in an email: sars at tomatonation dot com.
2. If you can find a tomato costume anywhere that I might be able to rent, or buy at a discount, something, anything, please also email me any links you might find. I’ve Googled and not had much luck. Even if you’re friends with a costume designer who might be willing to work cheap and get some free publicity on TN, that’s a great start.
3. Want to donate a prize? Email me. We’d love to have you.
4. Get ready to KICK SOME ASS AND BE AWESOME. Excuse me: “KICK SOME MORE ASS AND BE MORE AWESOME.” And by that I mean get ready to raise a buttload of money. Whatever you can do, it’s not “nothing” or “too small to count.” The most amazing, fantastic, makes-me-honored-to-be-near-it thing about the TN contest is the fact that everybody gets in the traces and pulls — everyone together. Whatever you can do? Awesome. Five bucks, fifty bucks, whatever you found in the couch, just contribute and send me your receipt and feel good about it. Don’t have a cent to spare? Please link the contest on your blog or tell a friend. Take your giant change jar to the bank and donate the total. Whatever you can manage.
DonorsChoose signed up a bunch of other blogs and bloggers this year, big-name types. I wish them luck. We’re out to buy some crayons here and there are no losers.
But if there is to be a rumble…only a fool would bet against y’all.
All right. Questions, ask ’em in the comments. Money, save it ’til Monday. Official contest page, expect it over the weekend. Prizes, costume links, and DC projects, shoot me an email.
In conclusion: A human vegetable dancing in midtown will cost you forty thousand dollars. Go get it.
Tags: contests
Here’s a tomato costume. The company even ships it right to you.
OH HELL YES. DonorsChoose shall receive a goodly portion of my Christmas bonus this year, because this? Is not to be missed.
If we raise the $40k (which I have no doubt we will), and you dance around Andy Samburg like an idiot, I want to see it on SNL. Digital Short, baby!
I actually just saw Samberg today by the elevators; he was giving me a semi-hairy-eyeball “what’s with the civilians in SNL airspace” look as it was, God knows what he’d do if a giant tomato starting chasing him back into the dressing rooms, gibbering about the Angela dance.
Guess you’ll find out!
Jenn: Hilarious. I don’t know if a S/M body is going to cut it, though; I’ll email them.
Ooh. Andy Samberg.
No, nothing else to contribute. Other than that I’m totally sending you some of my hard-earned studenty dollars because children + tomato costume > liquor.
Oooh, if you’re going to wear that, may I point out that the woman in the photo is — dare I say it? — braver than you. Because: bare legs. Think about it.
I don’t know if this is an avenue you’ve already pursued (I tend to assume all residents of the internet know one another) or if this is the kind of thing you’re looking for, but check out this website and specifically the “incredible stuff I made” section. I gather that Rob does commission work, and shipping from California is probably cheaper than shipping from the UK. I think.
Oh Sars! How awesome. All my friends who are hard to shop for will be getting donations made in their name’s for Christmas. Too fantastic. You spoil us.
I’ll make it for you. I’ve never actually made a vegetable before, but I have made an Audrey the Maneating Venus Flytrap costume, and how different can it be? When would you want it by?
Let’s just say, I was expecting something a bit different from “S/M body”.
Hey, come ON, it’s _costumes_ over the INTERNET.
Awesome. Simply awesome. I wish so much that I lived in NYC right now. :-)
This is brilliant. Whoever came up with that concept should be bought copious drinks.
On the other hand, I keep hearing Sidney Pollack yelling “YOU WERE A TOMATO!!” This frightens me.
Don’t feel bad, Haardvark. I was expecting to see a tomato with a whip or leather or something.
And yay for money for the schools. Science and Math projects are super cool by me.
Eeek! I was looking at the tomato costume Jenn linked to above (which, good find!) and made the mistake of checking out the other costumes. That hot dog costume is absolutely terrifying.
The hotdog is terrifying, but I find the chocolate bar confusing. If it’s “Her-she’s” shouldn’t it NOT have nuts? Maybe? I’m just saying…
I was going to donate for this contest anyway, and even though we just bought a bigger house and have the bigger mortgage to show for it, I’m going to donate as much as I can just to be able to witness this. AND – Sars, if you tell us what day this will be happening, I might just organize a field trip into NYC to witness it live and in person. Because in the future, when you google “awesome,” Sars dancing a la tomato will come up.
Honey, Andy Samberg is going to wish HE thought of it. (And if he ever gives you the “hairy eye” or whatever it is again, tell him for me that there’s a plus-sized Latina ready to sit on him – and not in a good way – until he learns to play nice!)
On a more important note, I hadn’t a clue why you shaved your head in the first place – good to be on the same page as everyone else here. Looking forward to contributing!
I am PSYCHED.
May I briefly be a pedant and point out that you will be a human fruit dancing in midtown? Unless of course you’re going by the United States’ legal definition of tomato as a vegetable.
I have a tomato tattooed on me; I’m aware it’s technically a berry, believe me. But if the Jersey legislature says it’s a vegetable, and we all use it as a vegetable, that’s good enough for me.
Don’t worry, people who want to witness the madness will have plenty of notice. Heh.
Yaaaaaaaaaay for the post-kiss dance in a tomato costume! Fantastically cool, I was going to donate anyway but now I’ll be harassing my coworkers too. “You, money, now.” Hee!
I’ll be right there, behind Rachel. The Connecticut contingent will represent: Straight Outta Stars Hollow.
Donors Choose donations are great holiday time and end of year gifts for your kids’ teachers, by the way. My money multitasks, man.
OMG, this is the best thing I’ve heard all day. Sars, I love you. I’ve laughed over Hobie and Little Joe, GBC, and other things over the years, but the idea of you in tomato costume all day, doing a dance, and going out for drinks? Fabulous.
My coworker used this apple costume and made green felt “leaves” for the top to make it look like a tomato: http://tinyurl.com/2btew9
Dude. *SO* going to donate big time for this, and tell ALL my friends and family!
Oh man.
OH MAN I wish I could see it in person. :)
This must happen. It simply must happen.
I’m STILL so glad you’re not doing the caffeine thing.
Hey, just so people know, LiveJournal is doing a thing where they’re giving out gift certificates to Donors Choose. You just have to claim them by 5 on Monday. Hey, when does Sars’s contest start? Oh, right, Monday! Woo! Anyway, info here: http://community.livejournal.com/lj_biz/242903.html?page=2&style=mine
Heh. I was just coming over to say that, Ruby.
I submitted a proposal to Donor’s Choose a few months ago and my classroom library was just fully funded last week. I’m a proud 6th grade teacher at Lincoln Middle School in Berwyn, IL. My students are mostly Hispanic and come from low income families. My proposal explained how my students look up to me because I am Hispanic like they are, grew up in the same community and attended the same high school they will most likely go to. I feel that I am a great example of what they can become. As the only Hispanic teacher at my school, I feel that the expectations of their community have gone up. I encourage my students to become better citizens as well as avid readers. In order to share my passion of reading, I plan to build a classroom library in a huge closet in my room filled with bean bags, pillows, bookcases, and artwork. My students and I are being donated 986 dollars worth of novels because of generous people like you. It is an amazing start to my classroom library. Thank you!!!
[…] competition was fierce. Bloggers promised to don tomato suits and dance at NYC’s Rockefeller Center. They pimped their cute kids for persuasive videos. They dangled free iPods and whatnot. They […]