“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.
From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.
Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.
Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.
The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!
Dear Sars,
First, thank you thank you for saving me from death by boredom at many a lame temp job.
Now, my question: which is correct, “Napoleon was from France,” or “Napoleon is from France”?People almost always …
Dear Sars,
My cat, like yours, tends to vomit from time to time.She has had this problem for ten years now, so I’m not worried about her health; it’s just the way she is.Instead, I would …
Hey Sars,
Thanks for taking the time to read this, it seems somewhat ridiculous but I
thought I might see if you could write some sense into me.
I live in a sharehouse, that was once populated by …
It all started about six weeks ago, when I went back to my dermatologist for the first time in five years. I don’t know why it took me five years; I really like Dr. R. …
Just an addendum to your answer to the vine question from Flummoxed Bridesmaid: I got married six months ago to a man who is as pack-ratty as I am.Since we certainly didn’t need a fourth …
Hey Sars,
I just had to write after reading Lost and Bewildered’s letter about
identity after losing her mom.I lost my mom at roughly the same age
and went through much of what she describes.I second your advice …
Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Helllloooooo!
Wing Chun: Hee. It’s about time.
Sarah: Can you believe that?
Wing Chun: Well. It’s not like he was known for his clean living.
Sarah: But…wait, who are we talking about?
Wing Chun: Rick…James? Aren’t we?
Sarah: …
Hi Sars,
I’ve been reading The Vine for almost a year now and finally decided to
try writing myself.
First of all, I’ll try my best, but please pardon my grammar mistakes,
since I’m from non-English-speaking overseas.
Just a little …
Dear Sars,
I’m not sure if I’m crazy or if this kind of
construction is actually wrong:
“My laptop is being temperamental today.”
Isn’t “is being” redundant? They’re both forms of the
same verb, and “My laptop is temperamental today”
conveys …
To: The cats
From: The tall, exasperated food source to whom you never, ever listen
Re: Policy review
It has come to my attention of late — if by “of late” I mean “beginning in August of 1995” …