Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

The Vine: July 1, 2004
July 1, 2004 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
Next semester, I will officially be certified to teach high school English in a Large Southern State with one star on the flag. The Large Southern State legislature recently passed a law requiring all …

Girls’ Bike Club III: The GBC Strikes Back
June 30, 2004 · No Comment

Sarah: Hello.
Wing Chun: Oh, hello.
Sarah: So. What’s up?
Wing Chun: Oh, you know. You?
Sarah: Nothing. Not a thing.
Wing Chun: Meeeee neither.
Sarah: …
Wing Chun: …
Sarah: [cough]
Wing Chun: Anyway.
Sarah: Okay, so, the thing is, and I hesitate to …

The Vine: June 24, 2004
June 24, 2004 · No Comment

Hi! I love your website, and your advice, so I’m hoping you can help me with something. It’s not a huge problem, but it’s one of those little niggling things that you can’t get rid …

The Subheroes Chapter 2: Soup To Nuts
June 23, 2004 · No Comment

Slam! goes the phone, rrrrrump go the wheels of my desk chair, sssswish goes my messenger bag over my shoulders, and I’m halfway across the outer office when I see the baby, and I swear …

The Vine: June 22, 2004
June 22, 2004 · No Comment

Sarah,
This is a long story, but I will try and stick to the relevant issues. I
recently got engaged to a wonderful man, J. We’ve dated for two and a half years and
I am completely happy …

The Vine: June 18, 2004
June 18, 2004 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
I’m a long-time reader, but a first-time writer. Anyway, I’m
currently spending a year abroad, in a beautiful,
student-friendly, European city.And while I enjoy the accents, and
going out to pubs, and have met a lot of …

The Vine: June 16, 2004
June 16, 2004 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
My boyfriend and I have been dating for well over a year. We are both in
love and happy with the relationship. We are also both 20 years old and
juniors in college. The problem is …

The Subheroes Chapter 1: Distraction
June 16, 2004 · No Comment

Every job, you need a different thing, a different combination. Sometimes, you only need Ro Jin. Sometimes, you need The Nose and Jenny, or The Nose and Jenny and a Driver and a Navigator and …

The Vine: June 14, 2004
June 14, 2004 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
I have what may seem like a silly question, but I and most of my friends are
only a year out of college and we’ve never had to deal with such job-related
puzzles before.
I have a …

The Vine: June 12, 2004
June 12, 2004 · No Comment

Sars,
I’m going to spare you the gory details of this one and stick to the short
version.I hope I manage to include all relevant details.
Last year I was
visiting my parents and “friends from home” for the …