“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.
From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.
Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.
Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.
The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!
Hey Sars! I love TN, especially the Collected Cat Rants, and when I realized I had a dilemma, I thought it should go to you.
Welcome to The High School Soap Opera. The key players are …
Sars,
I’m a 22-year-old virgin who has absolutely no desire to have sex. I’ve had two boyfriends in my life, one when I was 17 and one when I was 20, but again, no desire to …
It is the job of the fifth-grade girl to master all things Ew, Gross. She must seek out Ew, Gross tirelessly; she must react to Ew, Gross with melodramatic shrieking, squirming, eye-shielding, and simulated gagging; …
Hi Sars,
Okay. There’s this boy. I’ve known him for about two years, and I’ve been seriously interested in him — strongly infatuated with him, anyway — for a ridiculously long time now, a little over …
Sars,
An interesting (if by “interesting” I mean “infuriating and rage-inducing”) situation blindsided me yesterday, and I thought I’d run it past you.
Two of my closest friends are getting married in August (as in marrying each …
Hey there Sars —
I have a problem that I’m pretty sure has never been covered in your illustrious column. See, my otherwise lovely and well-behaved husband is a compulsive talker.
And when I say “compulsive,” I …
Sars —
Generally your advice is spot-on, but your comments to Closet Case resemble pretty much what most non-gay people seem to think is the best advice for people who are still in the closet: reassurance …
I recently received a rather acidic email from a reader, demanding to know how I could “review” the AFI’s 100 Greatest Movies if I hadn’t seen half the films on the list. Well, I’ll tell …
Hey Sars,
I had a cat that also loved nothing more than peeing and/or crapping on the bathmat, but the bathmat ONLY. The vet remarked that the rubber backing on bathmats smells like ammonia to cats, …
Dear Sars,
I love The Vine. Your responses are consistently perceptive, on target and entertaining. I have yet to disagree with any advice you’ve given, so I feel rather strange writing in to add to a …