Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Drop The Chalupa
October 22, 2001 · No Comment

Yearbook pages followed a strict blueprint at my high school. Mrs. McPherson gave us a square of blue graph paper, and a couple of weeks later we brought it back to her, a professional photo …

The Vine: October 19, 2001
October 19, 2001 · No Comment

Hey Sarah,
Yes, it’s another email about Buttercup.Sorry but today’s email about her poked at me a bit.I’ve been engaged before and through the grace of God or just myself I realized that wasn’t the person …

The Vine: October 18, 2001
October 18, 2001 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
You seem to have a lot of good, classy advice to give. Right now, I definitely need some.
My boyfriend and I have been together for six months and I recently moved into his house …

The Vine: October 17, 2001
October 17, 2001 · No Comment

Sars, I love your work, et cetera.
Here’s my problem, and it’s a fatal one:
I’m currently apartment/cat/fish-sitting for two friends of mine.Everything has gone fairly well.The cats and I play and sleep together, I’ve watered everything …

The Vine: October 16, 2001
October 16, 2001 · No Comment

Hi Sars,
I have been a long time reader and fan of your work at MBTV and here at Tomato Nation. You give very good advice, and I would really appreciate a little help. Here’s the …

Hit The Gas
October 15, 2001 · 9 Comments

Last night, Q and I settled down on the couch with a couple of big sandwiches, a bag of chips, a bottle of wine, and the premiere of Degrassi: The Next Generation. I’d had the …

The Vine: October 12, 2001
October 12, 2001 · No Comment

Sars,
I’ve been reading the problem of and answers to Officemate with interest. Although I don’t have a co-worker with this abusive boyfriend problem, I do have a close friend. Although I don’t think it’s gotten …

The Vine: October 11, 2001
October 11, 2001 · No Comment

Sars,
Insert fawning praise of your web site and other projects here. I enjoy all the things you write, thanks so much for sharing them with the world.
Worried Officemate needs to know that Susan has a …

The Vine: October 10, 2001
October 10, 2001 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
I have this dilemma with a co-worker whom I’ll call Susan. She’s nice, funny, and great as far as co-workers go.We’re not close friends or anything, but we have worked in very close quarters …

Wigstock
October 9, 2001 · No Comment

Regina: So then he’s all, “Okay, well, bye,” and I’m all, “Okay, well, bye, except WHAT THE FUCK DUDE,” and he’s like, “Errr, I have people over, so,” and I’m like, “Oh, well, that’s just …