Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

June Bugs
June 20, 2001 · No Comment

“We just have to get to June.”
“June.”
“Juuuuune.”
“Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuune.”
“How long has May been going on for, now?”
“Two years? Three years?”
“Longer. I think Chevy Chase still had a talk show when May started.”
“I think you’re right.”
“It’s bad.”
“Well, it’s …

The Vine: June 19, 2001
June 19, 2001 · No Comment

From all of your articles and advice I’ve read you seem like a fairly sensible person, able to see multiple sides of an issue, so I’m turning to you for a bit of advice.
I have …

The Vine: June 7, 2001
June 7, 2001 · No Comment

Dear Sarah,
I’ve spoken to just about everyone I know about this problem, but they just keep telling me what they think I want to hear, so I thought maybe you could help.
I’ve been in what …

The Vine: June 6, 2001
June 6, 2001 · No Comment

Hi Sarah,
When I read The Vine (as I love to do and you’ve even printed one of my letters) and I saw the letter from Bitter Bridesmaid, it really struck a note with me.I had …

The Vine: June 5, 2001
June 5, 2001 · No Comment

This is in response to the letter from The Untouchable. I’ve experienced exactly what she is going through. I too grew up in a very conservative, religious family, and did not start dating until I …

The Vine: June 4, 2001
June 4, 2001 · No Comment

Oh great goddess of Reason and Humor,
I bow to thee.
Let me begin by stating that I adore your site…I have read EVERY SINGLE piece on Tomato Nation, and look forward to reading more.Unfortunately, I didn’t …

The Vine: June 1, 2001
June 1, 2001 · No Comment

Here’s one for you.
I’m the youngest of three siblings.My brothers are 10 and 11 years older. Brother 1 and I live in the same city, which is about two hours away from my parents.I see …

The Vine: May 31, 2001
May 31, 2001 · No Comment

Hi Sarah,
I have one word for Shameless Hussy: porn. My current boyfriend had limited experience with other women but you would never have known it, and it was because he enjoyed porn. It’s something they …

The Vine: May 30, 2001
May 30, 2001 · No Comment

Sars Dear,
In that same vein [as Sick Of Personal Questions], one of the things I truly hate from people is the overwhelming urge they seem to have to touch a pregnant woman’s stomach. As if …

The Vine: May 29, 2001
May 29, 2001 · No Comment

Dear fellow cat slave,
I have a problem, and I was hoping that between you and your illustrious felines, you might help me see my way through it. My problem is this: I’ve been with Bear …