Dear Dr. Schlechtekatz,
Our deepest apologies for not contacting you sooner. We need not remind you that our work must remain completely secret, and as a consequence of attempting to maintain our undercover status, we have …

1. contradiction
The cats love to go outside the apartment — love it. The hallway is their favorite place, their one true love. Hobey likes to sit at the front door and stare at the crack …

The time eventually comes each year — usually in early October, but it varies, depending on the weather — for me to gather up all of my sandals and slides and summery shoes and put …

In about a month, I will relocate to Toronto for the season. I’ve scored a sweet sublet complete with DSL and a parking space, and I can’t wait to blow out of Manhattan with my …

A month or two ago, I lugged the Hobe to the vet for his annual check-up. While we waited — well, I waited; the Hobe alternated between pointedly ignoring me and staring daggers at the …

The universe has its laws. Conservation of energy, conservation of matter, the speed at which light travels – all well-known properties of our universe, all proven by science, all memorized by high-school physics students. Other …

It started on Thursday night when Hobey went into The Throw-Up Crouch. Cat owners everywhere know The Throw-Up Crouch: the cat is going about his business, surveying his domain or taking a nap or administering …

I grew up in a multi-cat household. My family always had two cats, starting with Ding, who actually beat me to the first-child punch by nearly a year. My parents have lots of pictures of …

I must stop watching Animal Planet. Every time I flip to Channel 86, it puts ideas in my head about acquiring kooky pets that have no business sharing a Manhattan studio with a human and …

The other day, while giving my apartment a long-overdue spring cleaning, I found a number of things – a handful of small change lodged in between the cushions of my couch, a dry cleaner’s receipt …