In college, Ernie and I often used to communicate using Talking Heads songs, partly because that’s all we listened to besides Cypress Hill and the Smiths, partly because it functioned as a secret code that …

Regina: Let’s say you could do anything you wanted.
Sarah: Oh, yes — let’s.
Regina: No, really. Let’s say you could do whatever you wanted and get away with it.
Sarah: Okay. Hee.
Regina: What?
Sarah: Oh, just thinking about …

I made a couple of New Year’s resolutions this year. I don’t bother, ordinarily, since the average New Year’s resolution is pointless, unrealistic, and destined to go the way of the Edsel by Valentine’s Day, …

It’s Monday again. I had a houseguest over the weekend, and while the houseguest rocked my world, the pile of work which I ignored in favor of houseguest fun times did not, and I have …

It’s Monday. I slept poorly last night, partly because I ate a snack about an hour before going to bed and had utterly bizarre chocolate-fueled dreams involving Tom Skerritt and a merry-go-round as a result, …

I helped my best friend move last Friday. Ernie had to move a bunch of stuff from her old old apartment, which she’d sold, to her more recent old apartment, which she’d vacated after a …

I know, I know. It’s got you up nights. You lie in your bed, staring at the ceiling, the minutes stretching into hours, and you toss and turn and punch your pillow and say to …

Ernie and I became best friends because we could both derive hours of undiminished amusement from bathroom humor. We became friends in a rather roundabout fashion; we met through our mutual friend The Lip at …

If you have cable television, you probably have a “default channel” – the channel you check as soon as you turn on the television, the channel to which you return after fruitless flip-throughs and during …

I cultivated many a guilty pleasure as a kid – spending my entire allowance on Skor bars; reading the naughty parts of The Thorn Birds; procuring a bottle of neon pink nailpolish, stealing through the …