A year and a half ago I got married. Six months later we were both sleeping around and out of love. We still moved away to Canada and signed a one-year lease. We’re happy enough, no fights or divorce lawyers involved. Apathy is a stabilizing force sometimes. I sleep in the bedroom, he sleeps in the living room. Once in awhile, if we’re stoned, we sleep together on the floor. But I’m confused. I don’t want to be with him anymore. I’m twenty-four and trying to be single. But I haven’t bothered to get divorced. Technically, I’m not even separated, am I? If I know I’m done with him and ready to move on, is that enough? Do I have to break the lease, pay the fines and move all of my crap before I can start dating this other guy I met? I want a casual boyfriend, not another affaire.Marital Status-ImpairedDear Impaired,

Confused? About what? You don’t love your husband. Get divorced. Whine as much as you like about the costs and hassles involved, but act your age and do it anyway. Your meaningless marriage has afforded you a safety net of sorts, and you’ve gotten way too used to it. You don’t have the freedom you think you do; that freedom has a price. Pay it and get out.

Once you’ve gotten out, ask yourself why you find the security of inertia quite so attractive, and don’t legally attach yourself to anyone else until you have an answer.

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