Hi! I’m a long-time reader, first-time writer. I really enjoy the site.

My friend, Faith, and I were imitating/mocking speech patterns. We were
wondering what to properly call the following affliction:

When J. Lo was presenting at the Oscars this past year and proved that you
can take Jenny off of the block, but can’t take the block outta Jenny, and
pronounced “mountain” as “MOW’en.”

Pronouncing “Oh, no! You didn’t!” as “Oh, no! You DI’en!”

And because I can’t turn down an opportunity to refer some hip rap chicks,
in Salt ‘n’ Pepa’s “If You Really Want Me” when the guy is rapping, “Yes,
we, you and me / You gotta let me know SUH’en!”

Is it a glottal stop? We knew you’d lead us in the path of righteousness.

Thanks,
Marcy

My fiancé is a very sane person. He has a family, a
steady corporate job, a vehicle and manages his affairs
well. He is intelligent and stable, with a slight
tendency to keep things inside.

We cohabitate, have a firm date for the wedding and
are really good together. The problem isn’t our
relationship at all.

He belives in the paranormal. Not like ghosts et cetera. In
his own unique brand of magic. And he is waiting
around for his magic to work in the real world. He
keeps testing it with certain scientific tools. So far
no results. His powers that be have made vague
promises of future real world magic, but no results
yet. Obviously he is getting discouraged. I knew all
this going into things. I know he has beliefs I don’t
understand, I’m okay with that, I think.

But he isn’t in this alone. He has a whole group (between 15-30 people worldwide, mostly located
locally) who are just as involved. And like him, for
the most part these aren’t scary flaky people. They
are regular sane 9-5 people.

So what’s the problem? I’m having agita about the whole
magic thing. I am less able to make non-judgmental
positive statements about the future possiblities of
real magic.

I have talked to him about this. I don’t feel that I
have the right to ask him, or any other person to give
up a practice or stop believing something that doesn’t
hurt me. It doesn’t take him away from me often, it
doesn’t put him in physical harm, I don’t have to be
involved if I don’t want to (although we do things
socially with the group). It doesn’t hurt me and I
don’t spend much time thinking about it but when I do
it upsets me. So — either tell me that if it bothers me
enough to end it, do so, or tell me to be quiet about
it if losing this amazing man isn’t worth it.

Wise woman of the web, please — a word?

Magic Man’s Maid — Maybe?

I have a question concerning brackets. I see brackets
used in writing all the time, but I can’t figure out
why they are used. Here is the example that prompted
me to write today (and if I am violating any copyright
by quoting this, please feel free to edit in a more
suitable example).

I was reading a recap of American Idol on TWoP,
and on page 8 Shack used the following to describe
what Randy said about one of the performers:

Quote: She “made it [her] own.”

Why is the “her” in brackets? Since the statement is
in quotations, shouldn’t it read exactly as it was
spoken? So does this mean the exact words he said were
not “made it her own”? And if that’s true, why is it
in quotes, and why doesn’t Shack just write exactly
what Randy said? (Not criticizing Shack’s writing
style, love the Shack!)

I see this all the time, and I think I can guess why
it’s used (maybe Randy said “You made it your own”?)
But I can’t figure out why it’s used so much, or why
I’d want to use it in my own writing…it irritates
me. I guess I just think the sentence would look
better without having brackets cluttering it up. What
do you think?

Thanks,
Brackets, Schmackets

Here goes: My roommate is a 20-year-old college sophomore who’s never really had any type of long-term boyfriend to speak of. Her first actual relationship was last summer, when she dated a boy who was entering his senior year of high school. Of course, he was busy most of the summer with school-related camps, college visits, et cetera and she didn’t get to spend much time with him during the two or three months they were dating. They mutually decided to break up once school started back, since our college is over an hour away from her hometown and they wouldn’t get to see each other very much. It should also be noted that she cheated on him multiple times, and I’m sure he’s found out about most, if not all, of her escapades. Needless to say, he never wanted to see her again and refused to take her calls.

The break-up wasn’t overly terrible or complicated, as break-ups go, but she cried almost every night and was an emotional basketcase for months over this “relationship.” As recently as a couple of months ago she called him and when he answered the phone, she had a full-fledged panic attack on campus. She called me, and I had to leave class because I thought something was seriously wrong with her.

They have only recently started to hang out as friends at parties and other social gatherings. That’s all fine and good, I guess, but yesterday I came home to find out that she’s hosting a party for him and his high school friends at our apartment on Friday. She is already scheduled to work all day on Friday in her hometown, so she is going to drive an hour and a half home on Thursday, drive back to our apartment Friday night for the party, drive back home on Saturday and back to the apartment on Sunday. Plus, when she found out that I was going to invite some people that are actually our age, she got really upset and said some really hateful things to me. She is basically bending over backwards to make sure that everything is just exactly how she wants it for this guy’s visit, but he’s made it perfectly clear that he has no romantic interest in her whatsover. He’s also going to school on the West Coast (we live on the East Coast), so even if he was interested in her, there’s really no potential for a long-term relationship anyway.

She has been so excited, to the point of giddiness, since she found out from a mutual friend that this guy had agreed to come to our apartment if she would organize this party, and it’s freaking me out how recklessly she’s trying to throw herself at him. It’s really quite nauseating to see her obsessing over him like this, and I’m rapidly losing respect for her as a person. She is one of my good friends and I don’t want her to put herself in a position to get hurt again (especially when she was so miserable for so long the first time), but is it worth wasting my breath trying to reason with her if there’s a good chance she’ll just get angry and/or upset?

Thanks so much,
Skeptical but Protective Friend

I’m in my mid-twenties, and have been interested in someone
for a bit. We are friends, and I feel that there
could be something more between us (though I could be
misinterpreting that).

The situation is a bit
complicated, in that it seems that she’s still
interested in an ex also. Even though the two aren’t
officially dating, it’s evident that they still have
something for each other. Unfortunately, the ex is a
bit of a jerk, centers the world around himself, and
seems a bit immature. My current intention isn’t to
knowingly put myself between them, purposely cause a
rift, or get in the middle of this situation and make
things tougher. I’m not comfortable doing that to
other people. Unfortunately, I feel that principle
puts me in the position where I would continue to be
her friend (which is really cool and fine with me,
though not optimal), and if I wanted to further the
relationship, some of the complicated things need to
be taken care of first.

But at the same time, I don’t want to put the blinders
on since I don’t feel that anything’s going to happen
in the near future. There may be someone else out
there who would be a better match.

I need impartial advice on this, since all of my
friends are emotionally involved in the situation. Do
you see any other course of action which I’m not
considering at the moment with this situation?

Thanks a lot, Sars!

Still Waiting Patiently