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The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Home » The Vine

The Vine: August 24, 2006

Submitted by on August 24, 2006 – 3:01 PMNo Comment

Hello there,

I have had a couple of instances in which someone who works for me has had a serious hygiene problem. In the first, I worked for a Major Entertainment Company, which has VERY well-defined, strict guidelines regarding appearance and grooming. Everyone was clearly held to the same standard; I had no compunction about sending someone home to shave or watching while they removed their sparkly blue nail polish. The uniform had to be “clean and fresh-smelling” every day, and they were required to use “soap, deodorant, and other personal care products as appropriate.” Enforcement here was no problem; everyone understood the expectation when they took the job. There were also enough excess emplyees at this company that it didn’t cripple the operation if someone was gone for an hour while they went home to change out the black bra they had put on under their white blouse, or some such.

On to the present day. I work for a smallish hotel management company. The hourly associates also have uniforms that they have to wear, but the standards are not as clearly defined. Many of them have uniforms that have to be dry cleaned, and they wear suit and tuxedo jackets to work — dry cleaning them is expensive. Additionally, some managers are more relaxed than others when it comes to the grooming standards. I do not permit those in my area to wear the aforementioned glitter nail polish or multiple peircings in their ears; other managers are less picky. I’ve battled that one out before, but I don’t feel like at work, on work time is the right place for such “personal expression.” Most recently, we have had one male associate constantly show up to work smelling like BO. After a few hints from his peers, and no change, I asked a male colleague of mine to sit him down and tell him in no uncertain terms that we had received multiple complaints about his fragrance from his co-workers, and that it had to stop. We suggested laundering his jacket more often, and told him that we expected him to shower daily before coming into contact with the hotel’s guests. He hasn’t sued yet, and he’s smelling fresher, but I think it may just be a case of good luck on our part…

I guess my point is that it depends on the corporate culture, to an extent. It’s much easier to handle when you know that the employee is well aware that they are violating the standards they acknowledged when they were hired. On the other hand, if this guy showed up at his interview with flies circling about him, it will be difficult to convince him that it’s his responsibility to change. This is also how the law looks upon such situations in my state (Florida): you can’t fire someone for smelling, but you can fire them for smelling if they knew it was prohibited when they took the job. Stinkiness is subjective, you say? Not really. If a dozen different people document your stinkage on a dozen different days, you have a stink problem.

Hope this helps, it’s certainly a touchy subject, to say the least…

Glad HR Is Only a Tiny Bit Of My Job


They (HR) absolutely have to do something, and I’m appalled (but sadly, not surprised) that they haven’t. I’ve had this conversation with employees a number of times over the years, and while it’s not my fave thing to do, you just have to do it. You tell them specifically what the problem is, you tell them what they need to do to fix it, and then you have to make sure there are consequences if the employee doesn’t make the required changes.

Your advice is right on. The writer is management, so it’s within her rights to address things with him immediately and directly — but it doesn’t sound like Mitch is going to catch a clue easily. She should talk to Mitch when there’s specific behaviors she can focus on. After she talks to him, she should tell Mitch’s manager about their conversation, and she should let HR know that she has done so and that she has documented the conversation. She can forward copies of the documentation to all parties if she wants to, but at a minimum she should use email to notify both his manager and HR so that she can save a copy of the email. Receipting the email is a good idea as well.

When behavior X happens again, she should let HR know, remind them of the actions she has taken to date (forwarding a copy of the initial email is very effective) and indicate that she expects HR to address it immediately, as Mitch’s actions are contributing to an unpleasant, unproductive, possibly unsafe, and certainly hostile work environment. Invoking the “hostile work environment” will generally get even a lazy HR person moving. She should ask to be notified when the conversation has taken place, and then she should make sure she 1) gets notified that the conversation happens and 2) if the conversation does happen, that the behavior changes.

It sounds like she may have to sit on her HR group a bit to make this happen, unfortunately. I get embarrassed for my profession sometimes.

There are certain medical conditions that can result in really hideous body odor, which may be why HR is so completely wussy about this, but as far as I know they’re all treatable with various medications. I’ve known companies that have required individuals to get medical attention, in fact. I doubt that’s the case here, but FYI.

JG


Please allow me to dispel the myth that HR is in charge of talking to people about body odor. Unless the HR manager is the odiferous one’s supervisor, HR’s role is merely an advisory one. We also don’t throw birthday parties and baby showers, although, since I work in non-profit, I often end up unclogging toilets, or putting together furniture.

Anyway, after I got done cleaning up the diet soda I spewed all over my keyboard after reading that letter from Bated Breath, I thought perhaps I could weigh in on the subject.

While not versed in New Jersey law, I can state with some confidence that I don’t believe that state has any laws about terminating for poor performance, and that’s what this is. [“The letter-writer stated that he was from Jersey; I don’t know for sure that that’s where he’s working now.” — ed.] Can he still sue after being terminated? Yes, but I can sue my workplace tomorrow for something stupid as well. Doesn’t mean I will win. Document, document, document, and proceed with the termination in a thoughtful way, and the employer has an excellent chance of surviving a lawsuit. The only other issue that could come up would be the ADA, and Smelly Dud would have to prove, with a doctor’s assistance, that his body odor, unkempt appearance, need to spit into trashcans and cut his nails is the direct result of a disability that substantially limits one or more of his major life activities. He also could claim some sort of religious discrimination, but again, he would have to come up with a religion that pretty much covered all of his activities, as well as condoning dirty clothing. Even then, it would be tough for a court to require an office to put up with that.

First up, confront Smelly Dude himself, but not as a manager, since he is not this person’s manager. Try expressing concern that Smelly is not being perceived as professional, and that’s hurting his performance. Be frank about the fact that it’s hurting BB’s performance as well. If that has no effect, well, Bated Breath says he’s a manager. He needs to speak to the smelly employee’s supervisor as one manager to another. It’s the supervisor’s issue to deal with, as it’s a performance issue. HR’s only involvement should be as advisor, and possibly mediator.

Bated Breath should come to that meeting with statements from the other people who have to work with the Man-Eating Pong, to show that it is a definite problem in that it hurts morale, and most probably, the performance of other employees. Would the supervisor rather have a supported/mediated confrontation with one nasty person, or lose an office full of decent workers? He might bring sample letters or scripts that the supervisor can use, and offer to sit in on the meeting with the employee. If Bated Breath searches the internet, he should be able to find some words he can use.

If that doesn’t work, then he needs to ask himself some questions. Does he like the job enough to put up with the situation? If not, find another one, and move on. Is he willing to address the problem with the supervisor’s supervisor? Although really a last resort (unless he likes confrontation, which, I’m thinking, is “no”), that or a grievance procedure might produce results. If it’s affecting his work and other’s, he has an argument. If a supervisor is unwilling to address a performance issue with an employee, that supervisor isn’t doing his/her job either. Remember though, not every problem is going to be solved to the satisfaction of everyone.

As for Smelly Dude, water conservation aside, he probably has problems getting clean if he’s really obese. I’m no slender thing myself, so I’m not passing judgment, but I know people who are really big have…areas they can’t reach as well as others. This guy probably has difficulty cleaning anywhere that really needs to be cleaned; thus he avoids doing it at all. Doesn’t make it okay. There are people who buy sponges on a stick for such situations. I also have to scrub my brain with bleach after thinking about someone washing their dishes in dirty bath water.

VC


Sars,

My experience is a little bit different, both because of where I work (Texas, which is a fire-at-will state) and what I do (I manage a restaurant). However, we’ve had a few run-ins with similar situations in the 3+ years I’ve been doing what I do, and I think some of my advice could help “Bate.”

First of all, if we have a female employee with a “grooming” issue, then a female manager handles it, and male manager addresses a male. We take the offender aside to a private place (usually the manager’s office) and let them know that their personal hygiene/grooming standards are lacking, citing specific examples (i.e.: when you ride your bike to work in 95-degree weather, you smell gross!) but always in as tactful a manner as possible. We let the person know what improvements we need to see, and let them know that they will not be allowed to work a shift if they come in smelly/disheveled/dirty, etc., and that repeated offenses are grounds for termination. It helps that there is language in our employee handbook that supports this position.

I completely agree with you that it is an HR issue and the HR department needs to address the issue head-on with “Mitch” in clear, concise language, but having been on the enforcement end of such conversations, it’s not an easy task. Of course, the fact that a necessary action is not easy does not mean that it can or should be avoided. If “Bate” is not willing or able to wait for HR and/or Mitch’s management to take action, I suggest that s/he pull Mitch aside behind closed doors, and proceed with diplomacy. Using the old “compliment sandwich” approach might work here. Of course, in an ideal world, Mitch’s manager would tell him that his lack of hygiene standards is a distraction to the rest of the office, and that he is to come to work every day with a freshly showered body, clean hair, face, and hands, in clean, unstained clothing, with deodorant in place. Ultimately, someone needs to deal with “Mitch” head-on and let him know that what he is currently doing is unacceptable, and delineate for him exactly what needs to change.

Signed,
Soap Is Your Friend


Thanks, guys.

Readers also informed me that a “hostile work environment” does not include smells, or a crappy boss. Only cases of illegal discrimination based on race, sex, et cetera can qualify. It seems I’ve been invoking that term incorrectly in the past; my apologies.

Bate: Let us know what ends up happening. Apparently it takes a village to familiarize Mitch with laundry detergent.


Hi Sars –

I’m in Toronto, and am so horrible to fit for pants (5′, teeny waist, big hips) that I mostly wear skirts to just avoid the issue. For dress pants in the past, I used to wear a pair of Banana Republic Martin fit pants in petite size, which would then require extensive re-working. However, a great option is available in Toronto — TNT Blu at Hazelton Lanes or TNT Women on Eglinton Ave. Both carry several house brand lines of hard-to-fit sizes and they custom-tailor for fit. They aren’t cheap, running about $250 CDN per pair, but they look awesome, are very comfortable and hold up really well.

Hope that helps!

It’s easier to find an attractive bathing suit than well-fit pants


Dear Maybe For You — My Torso Ate Pittsburgh,

Thanks for the tip. Other reader suggestions for fancier black pants appear below. Multiple suggestions are asterisked.

Coldwatercreek.com
Put appliques/beadwork/ribbon from a sewing-notions or craft store on a plain pair of pants — or get a tailor to do it for you*
The little store in Atrium on Bay, on the Edward St. side, near Pickle Barrel
tristan-america.com
www.laredoute.com
Ross Dress For Less
The Limited (if she’s size 12 or under)


I really sympathize here, I happen to be a 30A, which means I can’t shop in stores for bras AT ALL unless I want to be browsing the training bra section with my 11 year old sister. No thanks. Anyway, I found this website called Lula Lu that specializes in bras and lingerie for the smaller-busted ladies. The largest cup size they have is a B, but the band sizes go all the way from 30 to 38. Some of their stuff is a little pricey, but they have really great sales prices. There’s a really good selection, and they even have matching panties for a lot of the styles, I can’t recommend this site more, it’s fantastic.

Small but Perky


Dear Perk,

Thanks! More recommendations below; asterisk means I got it more than once.

Playtex’s NA line*
Natori
Cosabella
Now and forever, go to the dusty ancient-lady bra shop and get a proper fitting*
Tank-style undershirt
Olga model #s 32800 and 32880
Target A and “barely A”
Lily of France
Calvin Klein t-shirt or Barely There bras*
Intimissimi: www.intimissimi.com*
Bras for teenagers (try the Sears brand)
NA styles at onehanesplace.com*
Chemises
Maidenform for Girls
Bralettes
Shelf-bra tank tops
Gossard
Simone Perele
Valisere
Search figleaves.com by cup size*
Warner’s Satin Tuxedo Wire-Free Contour #02023B Gap Body’s T-Shirt and Simple bras*
Victoria’s Secret’s Angels Secret Embrace
www.vroomendreesmann.nl
TJ Maxx
H&M
Nordstrom Intimates

[8/24/06]

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