The Vine: August 3, 2007
Dear Sars,
My friend recently asked me to be one of her bridesmaids, and since I live in the city — and she’s in Ohio — she wants my help in finding dresses for the maid of honor and bridesmaids, seeing as she has not picked them out herself. Her dream is to have us dressed in cobalt blue dresses. Our body types are all over the place — skinny and small-chested to medium build and busty, and one girl is over 6 feet tall while I am 5′ 3″ on a good day.
I was hoping that you might have some helpful hints to dresses (I was thinking ruching might work on all of our body types?) that come in cobalt blue…my friend is intent on having cobalt dresses, and specifically does not want royal blue, sky blue or turquoise…please help!
Thanks in advance,
Having The Wedding Blues
Dear Blues,
How intent is your friend on having everyone in the same cut of dress?This was the genius of my sister-in-law’s approach — she identified the color she wanted in the J. Crew catalog, but as long as we got the dress in “summer beet” (or whatever it was), we could get whichever cut we wanted.And when you have eight bridesmaids spanning nearly a foot in height, one of whom is pregnant, some B cups, some DD cups, it really makes things easier.And we did have a range of dresses — about half Emmas, one worn with the optional straps, a couple of Sadies, a Whitney, and one dress style they don’t make anymore — but we also had a range of hairstyles, complexions, body ink, and so on.You’ll never get everyone looking identical.
Another issue: the color itself is kind of tough.Aside from the fact that deep blue is tough on pale complexions and difficult to match with accessories, bridesmaids’ dresses tend to be summery.The bridal industry is kind of not dealing with the idea that sometimes people get married in November, so a lot of these dresses are more readily available in summery colors, which cobalt blue really isn’t.So the bride might need to have some flexibility here in terms of the cut being uniform across the entire bridal party.
The What Not To Wear books are very helpful for determining what necklines and dress shapes are best (and worst) for individual body types; big busts, for example, shouldn’t wear crewneck/cut-across necklines, because it gives you visual monoboob, so if you have a sleeveless V or scoop-neck option, that’s best for larger chests.Ruching is often spoken of as a universal figure-flatterer, but it depends on the ruching (a ruched band is fine on me; ruching leading to a center seam makes me look like a potato) and it depends on the figure.
See if you can’t get the bride to agree to some variation in the cut, just to make everyone’s lives easier, and we’ll see what the readers have to say.
Readers, cobalt-blue dresses.Any dress lines that you can suggest, where there’s some variety, would be great.And please shrink your links, if you post them, so they don’t rack the formatting.
Tags: Ask The Readers retail
David’s Bridal! I used them a few years ago. Each of the girls got to pick out their own style, so long as it was the same color. My sister found a gown on the discount rack for $20, but I think most dresses hover around $130 (cheap!). Plus, they have separates, so maybe the bridesmaids could all wear the same skirt, then have different tops.
I had a similar problem with my wedding. All of my girls were different shapes and sizes, from thin to a little heavy and busty, and we never thought we’d find a dress. We all got together for a weekend, minus 2 of the party, and tried on dresses. The heavier of the girls were with us and we had them try on different dresses to find a style that they were comfortable in, then tried the same dresses on the skinny girls. It was a strapless dress with a really high waist, so belly size wasn’t an issue.
I believe we went with http://www.alfredangelo.com. They have a huge selection of colors and dresses and a lot of their styles are flattering to different body types.
The Alfred Angelo line has ‘cobalt’ listed as an option – that would narrow it down and then she could say pick any style from that line? (as long as she’s willing to, as you suggested, let them pick their own dresses. Which according to wedding magazines is very in right now)
Finally, one I can help with! I majorly second the separates thing. My sister had nine bridesmaids ranging from 4’11” to 6’1″, skinny girls, bigger girls, busty, flat-chested, and everywhere in between. We went with Alfred Angelo separates – we all had the same skirt and a choice of several tops. It was awesome; everybody got something flattering, but when we were lined up the color visual (we wore cobalt, actually!) was such that you didn’t really notice that we were all wearing different tops. Best of all, no butt bows!
Hit it up here: http://www.alfredangelo.com/index.cfm/fuseaction/collections.displayMixMatch/categoryID/7ca192cc-0f8c-4474-99fa-6343769b3889
Most lines that specifically make maid dresses will make several styles in the same color — as long as you order them all at the same time to get the same dye-lot. Cobalt actually shouldn’t be hard; my cousin just got married and his wife dressed her maids in floor-length NAVY SATIN for a July 7 wedding. Honestly.
I would try the dress finder on theknot.com or weddingchannel.com to get an idea of makers of maids dresses (or pick up any wedding magazine — they all have ads for maid dresses as well as bridal gowns) and then go to the designer’s site to see what’s out there. Or if you go to any local bridal salon, or even a David’s Bridal as was already suggested, you might grab some color/fabric swatches that you could even send to the bride!
Aria Bridesmaid dresses are a good option, if the bride is willing to take the “same color, different cut” approach. You choose a fabric and color, which takes care of the time of year issue, and then you choose a cut. Here’s the site: http://www.ariadress.com/ My best friend had us wear these in her wedding. We had a VAST range of body types and everyone looked great. :)
My sister is getting married, and we ended up getting this dress in Blue Velvet. As far as I’ve been able to tell, David’s Blue Velvet color is pretty darn close to cobalt blue, and this particular dress looks good on all 5 of us, and we’ve got quite a variety of body types going for us. About the only one I can see this not working for is for those boyish figures with no boobs at all and, well, that’s why god gave us padded bras.
Seconding David’s Bridal and the rec to allow same color/different cuts. I was the MOH in a wedding that also featured a big bust, a tiny little petite thang, and an 8 mos preg belly. We all had to wear a dark wine but chose the style that made up look as best as we could, gievn that color (not pleasant on a pale redhead, let me tell ya).
Peeking at the David’s site shows that they have tons of colors as well, inc many shades of darker blues. And the price is very welcome – nothing can tick friends off more than a bride who chooses a pricey dress for them.
It’s hard to tell exact colors on the screen, but Watters & Watters has various lines that come in the same group of colors, some of which may or may not include cobalt. I think the best bet is for the bride to go to a big bridal store and look at the swatches to find the exact color she wants.
Yeah, I would second the vote for allowing different cuts for different bodies. The answer to “what flatters both an extremely tall and thin woman with little chest and a short woman with big breasts” is “almost nothing.” I think the same dress on everybody tends to flatter nobody, particularly since bridesmaid’s dresses are so prom-y a lot of the time anyway.
I just want to stress that…I mean, bridesmaids are usually paying for their own dresses, so if there’s any way to have them wind up in a dress in which they feel good, rather than merely a dress they’re willing to wear (which is what I think happens a lot of the time when you try to get everybody in the same dress), that’s a kindness. As Sarah pointed out, you can’t get everybody to look the same anyway — they’re not the Rockettes. I’m not sure that much is gained by forcing everyone into the same cut of dress, uniformity-wise.
I was able to go the pick-your-own-style route, but we went with black dresses, not blue.
Having a hard time picturing “cobalt blue.” Would this Thread dress be the right color?
Might be a little more pricey, but check out Simple Silhouettes (www.simpledress.com). Many, many options for both style and color – I chose this solution for my wedding, and I have seen two of my four bridesmaids wear their dresses again! (The other two also claimed they would, I just haven’t personally witnessed it.)
I covet the Thread line. They’re not cheap, but they’re gorgeous. There are several collections of dresses; each collection uses a different fabric that comes in several colors. These two colors might be close to cobalt. http://tinyurl.com/2ma9qy (chiffon charmeuse) and http://tinyurl.com/38g38x (duchess satin). If those colors work, search the collection for the right dress styles.
Simpledress.com has a similar setup — a list of fabrics and colors starts here: http://tinyurl.com/3xv5m9.
I didn’t have bridesmaids, and I haven’t been one since I was 12, but based on the experiences of my friends who have been/chosen bridesmaids, I think the same color/different cut plan is the most sensible and the most chic.
Aria Bridesmaids is great for variety but I’m not sure they have a true cobalt. Their website shows a royal blue that looks very cobalt, but colors on monitors will differ. The best thing about Aria, though, is that they’ll send you a “try-on” dress for fitting. And, of course, they’ll send fabric swatches.
The other possible option is a two-piece dress. My bridesmaids ranged from willowy and flat to short and busty. They all wore a long black skirt with a little fishtail train with a ruched strapless top in bronze. Non-traditional–bridesmaids not in one uniform color!–but they looked terrific and the ruched top was forgiving to everyone, even the really chesty bridesmaids. I think the designer was Amsale (I think this was the top).
Finally, I was a bridesmaid in a wedding where the bride purchased the fabric she wanted herself, gave us a choice of dress patterns, and then we each had our dress made by a seamstress of our choice. That also worked out well, though it was a more casual wedding, so the less finished look of the dresses wasn’t an issue.
I second Shannon’s suggestion of David’s Bridal. I did the exact same thing for my wedding last year, my maids got a discount because I bought my dress there, and I seem to recall that they had several shades of blue, one of which may even be classified in the “colbalt” family.
I would second the different cuts/same color option. For my wedding, I asked my bridesmaids to wear separates (an a-line skirt and then their choice of tops), from Alfred Sung (www.alfredsungdresses.com). It looks like they have a “sapphire” that seems similar to cobalt, so maybe that’s an option.
Definitely check out J Crew – not only the different, yet complementary styles, but their fall colors include a gorgeous blue. They call it Liberty Blue – it’s not cobalt, but much more universally flattering and classy looking than cobalt which just screams 80s prom to me.
Dessy.com has simple, flattering, “oh my god you might wear it again” dresses in every color variation you can think of. The dress on the front page has a gathered midriff, which creates many a waist where there is none.
Getting married in October – had the same issues. Totally different personalities, not to mention body types. I sent my bridesmaids to Alfred Angelo (available in most bridal shops nationwide) and asked them to pick out their tops from the seperates collection. I picked out a basic skirt so everyone looked like a “group”, but they had the freedom to choose any top that they felt comfortable in, as long as they got the same color. They are all excited about their “dresses”, and all of them are planning on wearing the tops with jeans, or black pants, in the future, so they have the bonus of reusing their outfits. :)
Plus, they come in a “plethera” of colors, so cobalt is not a problem!
Check out http://www.alfredangelo.com/index.cfm/fuseaction/collections.displayMixMatch/categoryId/7ca192cc-0f8c-4474-99fa-6343769b3889
for a selection of the seperates options and colors.
One option I have not read above was used at a friend’s wedding. She had 5 bridesmaids all in the same gorgeous orange/red silk shantung. Mmmm…but all in different styles. They didn’t look commercially made, so I guess she just sent them all a chunk of fabric, and had them sew/find dress makers. The effect was fantastic, and she could pick out exactly what color/type of fabric she wanted. It’s also not as expensive as you might think to find a dress maker…AND they’ll be tailor-fit, too, so they’ll look fantastic.
I wore an Ann Taylor Celebrations bridesmaid dress as my wedding dress and loved it. They have a line of colors with a variety of cuts, which I would recommend just like everyone else here. Their cornflower isn’t quite as bright as what she’s looking for, but if she decides to compromise they do have many colors that aren’t too pastely while still being soft.
http://www.anntaylor.com/catalog/department.jsp?N=1200042&categoryId=193
Absolutely agree with having separates. It’s extremely helpful when everyone can get something that makes them look nice. Alfred Angelo looks to have some seriously great options- I’ll be bookmarking that site for myself or my next friend that gets married.
Getting married in two months, and totally had the same issue. My bridesmaids range from 5’1″ and busty to 5’10” and recently had a baby… We found that everyone was happiest if the dress was not fitted down the waist/hips.
I was totally fine with the ‘here’s the color and designer, you pick what you like best’ approach, but it turned out that everyone liked the same dress and it really looks great on all of them. The favorite dresses in general were from Belsoie and B2; they have a wide range of colors and materials and the prices are pretty reasonable.
Here’s the dress we chose–it doesn’t look so trashy in real life!
http://www.jasminebridal.com/html/en/web1_b2_3_a.asp?id=1109
I used Watters and Watters for my bridesmaids, picked the color, let them pick the style — it worked out great, they were happy with their dresses and so was I. The thing to do in this case, I think though, is get the friend to send you a physical swatch (or a crayon, or a paint chip, whatever) of what she considers ‘cobalt’. I’d bet there are as many different cobalts as there are fabrics called cobalt, and whichever line you recommend to her may call her ‘cobalt’ something very different. I hope the bride is understanding of this issue — my mom is one of those people who cannot understand why what she thinks is red is called ‘barn’ at the paint store, and she’ll go into other stores and request something to match her ‘sand’ carpeting, and be so angry when it doesn’t match. (the people think she’s meaning sand colored, but she’s quoting the carpet manufacturers name for that specific carpet)
I spent a long time choosing matching shirts online in different styles for my family for a portrait, and they ended up not matching at all — it wasn’t an issue, really, they were close enough, but not close enough for a wedding, I wouldn’t think. She has to work from a swatch.
Not a specific suggestion but I wanted to weigh in as highly in favor of bridesmaids not needing to be matchy-matchy. I gave my bridesmaids each a different color and told them: tea-length dress, think garden party, have at it. The groomsmen wore corresponding ties, which we also let them pick as long as the color we gave them was dominant. They looked lovely, and everyone ended up with something they could both afford and easily wear again.
My visually-favorite wedding ever attended was relatively small (about 50 people) and they asked the guests to wear black and white. In contrast, the bridesmaids all wore different vintage dresses–all bubblegum pink. Against the field of black and white, it was amazing.
I also recc. Alfred Angelo. I had six bridesmaids in “cherry red” seperates. Everyone had the same skirt, but got to choose their own top, since my girls ranged from size 2 to size 24. The skirts looked good on everyone too, it was their “short” (tea length) satin, and was really flattering. The prices weren’t bad either~the most expensive one was about 160, and that’s because the top had a bunch of beadwork.
Just order them all together so the dye lot is the same.
I’d just like to add that runching is very risky on short-waisted women. One false move, and you have no waist whatsoever. It can work, but don’t rely on it working by virtue of being runching.
A-line! It flatters nearly everyone and looks formal and neat. Furthermore, if you ask for an A-line at any boutique they will know what you are talking about. I went to an all-girls high school that required that everyone wear the same white dress at graduation, and we had an A-line with a square neck and wide straps, and nobody looked bad.
If she can compromise, my stepsister had all the same color of dresses, and the same skirt, but the choice of top style was up to the individual bridesmaid. So there was someone in a spaghetti-strap top, a top with a scoop neck and cap sleeves, a corset-like sleeveless top, and a sleeveless top with a little fold.
No matter what you go with, get the dresses tailored to the individual. Usually off-the-rack dresses need bust and length adjustment. You can find a seamstress who will do this cheaply in most cities and suburbs.
If you can’t find cobalt blue dresses in the style you want, get them all in white and then get them dyed to match.
As a Big Girl, I would add that if the bride has any plus-sized bridesmaids, please, please, please don’t insist on the same dress for all of the girls. I was Matron of Honor in my best friend’s wedding, and because she was dead-set on all of us wearing the same dress, the dresses had to be chosen around what *I* could and couldn’t wear. It didn’t really work that well because I am shaped like an hourglass and her sister, the MOH, is teeny-tiny and not shaped like I am. We all looked okay, but I think we could have rocked the bridal runway if we’d been able to choose our own tops.
However, the dresses were cobalt blue and we got them from David’s, so color-wise, David’s would be a good start.
Another vote for David’s Bridal. The velvet blue color is close to cobalt. And this style seems to be the best one for a range of figures: http://www.davidsbridal.com/bridesmaids_bycolor_detail.jsp?stid=2334&sid=8002&cfid=7
Yet another vote for (a) the David’s line and (b) making colour the common thread and letting the girls choose different cuts.
Identically-cut dresses are kind of on the way out anyway; complimentary styles seem a little more chic and flattering. I myself outfitted my squad at a little mom-and-pop shop, and within the constraints of everything being burgundy, I bought them each the dress of their choice. I had three well-endowed girls of radically different heights and body shapes, and this let each of them shine in her own way.
But I hear good things about David’s, and apparently they have some kind of deal worked out with some national chain of tux suppliers so you can co-ordinate the men’s accessories to the women’s, if that’s your thing.
My bridesmaids dresses were cobalt blue. I ordered my fabric in a large bolt from http://www.fabricdirect.com (whether you go with crepe or satin, their Royal color is about as cobalt as you can get) then had each bridesmaid pick out a dress pattern that they liked. We then had the dresses made. It was really inexpensive, especially since we picked easy patterns and had family make the dresses. They looked very professional.
And one more vote for seeing if the bride can be talked into no matchy-matchy at all. It’s super-easy for the bride (here are my colors, here are everyone’s e-mail addresses, talk amongst yourselves, see you at the wedding), and the bridesmaids can buy dresses they love and will want to wear again–or can choose to wear dresses they love and already own. Two of my bridesmaids had dresses in their closets that looked terrific, and the third used the wedding as an excuse to buy a new dress, and they all looked beautiful together and separately. It’s probably more traditional for older brides to have this policy–I was 30, my Cinderella-fantasy days were a couple decades behind me–but I just couldn’t recommend it more highly.
If the bride is in Ohio, she should head to Cincinnati Bridal and Formal (www.bridalandformalinc.com). They are the largest bridal store in the state, and one of the largest in the country. In addition to thousands of bridal gowns, they have a HUGE room full of nothing but maids’ gowns. They carry every line you can name, including the frequently mentioned Alfred Angelo, and in just about every color of the rainbow.
This may not work if the wedding is VERY formal… but Victoria’s Secret’s bra dresses come in a wide variety of colours. I recently bought a square neckline ruched bust one that came below the knee (so it was more formal) that came in cobalt blue. It’s simple stretch cotton so it may not be formal enough. However I wore mine to a wedding where I read on the altar, and I dressed it up with gorgeous heels, a great updo and some gold dangly earrings. I am a redhead with pale skin and this colour did look good on me.
Be warned though that the back on this specific dress was very casual – similar to that on a wifebeater… they don’t show it on the website.