If you have to do something huge and terrifying, try setting a timer for 15-minute blocks. Do step one on your itemized list for 15 minutes and do nothing else. Then at the end of 15 minutes, get up from your computer (or whatever) and do something else, like read a chapter of a book or an article or just talk to a friend for 15 minutes. And then back to work for 15 minutes. The keys are to get away from the work for the breaks, and to make sure you don’t do anything else for the 15 minutes you are supposed to be working. Use a timer so you don’t have to think about time. It sounds crazy, but you can do anything for 15 minutes, and getting going will show you that you can actually do the work. I got this from a friend who was writing his dissertation for a little too long, and it has really helped another friend of mine who is writing a book meet his publisher’s deadlines.

Put your work area in a place you like to be, and put some thought into how nice it is. Plants and cut flowers help. It’s amazing how much more you get done when you are in a place that feels good. It doesn’t have to look like a catalog, just pleasant.

Schedule an afternoon or a morning or an evening every week to do “crappy life stuff.” Pay the bills, make a doctor’s appointment, call the insurance company again to yell at them for not covering birth control. Make it the same time each week. I did this a month ago, and I’m actually getting to all the stuff that used to follow me day after day and stressed me out. When I just thought I would “get to it,” I never did.

In the spirit of working at this issue, may I recommend a book? Time Management From The Inside Out, by Julie Morgenstern. I think I have bought all the stupid books on this subject over the years, but I like her approach the best because it’s more holistic and not just a few tips from someone who I already resent because they are more organized than I could possibly imagine being. Also, it is not that complicated to enact. I really liked her organizing book also, because my office is much less scary than before I applied it. I reached for a stamp just now and it was actually there.

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Yes, I’m Procrastinating Just By Writing This Email

I have been a fan of your site for quite some time, and I have been reading your Vines, and I decided that you are the only one that could give me any advice.

So here goes, I think.

I am in the drama production at my high school. There is also a guy in the production, and he is going out with one of my friends. This is my friend’s first boyfriend, and she really really likes him.

I describe myself to my friends as omnisexual. I like anything, as long as it’s good in bed. So, my first question is, does that make me a slut? (I’m still a virgin, if that matters, but I don’t think it does.)

The real reason that I’m writing you, however, is that I have been fooling around backstage with the guy. Nothing more than a hand up the shirt, not even in my bra or kissing, but what would you do in my situation?

When we are backstage in the dark, with nobody else around but the risk of someone coming at any time, it just turns both of us on, so much. I don’t think my friend enters either of our minds. And I feel really guilty when I think about what went on, but I don’t want to hurt her. My third question, then, is “should I tell her what’s going on?”

She was raped when she was a little girl, so anything sexual freaks her out, and she won’t let him touch her breasts or her legs or anything. He says he really wants to stay with her, but the lack of anything except kisses is driving him nuts.

This is kind of a way for me to straighten out my thoughts too, so that’s why it really isn’t very organized.

So what do you think?

Slut-Girl?