The Vine: July 21, 2004
Hey Sars,
Love your site…actually stumbled across it while Googling something about raisins. My friend hates those things as much as you do.
Hopefully I can help out your budding designer. Your advice was right on…”get it in writing” and spend the cash on a lawyer. Can’t be said often enough.
To answer her first question, she should go to the Graphic Artist’s Guild and get a copy of the Pricing And Ethical Guidelines. That will answer many of her questions, about pricing, legalities, sample contracts, billing guidelines…it’s the Design Bible for many of us working stiffs. Some better-stocked bookstores and art supply stores carry it too, I think I even saw one in B & N recently.
Next, she should carefully evaluate whether she’s ready to take on a big print job, and whether she wants to. It’s a whole different world than web design, if that’s where most of her experience comes from, and the technical issues of preparing a job for press can tear apart someone that’s not really experienced. She could do the creative work, though, and hand the job off to a production artist…if that’s appealing cost-wise. The extra dollars for the experienced prep artist might be well worth it, allowing her to get her feet wet on a tasty project, without fearing that it will fall apart on press.
About working on the sidelines of a day job: She fears this will be “months of pain” and it probably will be. The “real” book will be more demanding than the sample, because there’s more at stake. It’s hard to work after work. I have a full-time day job, which I love, and even my favorite client’s little projects are hard to face when I’ve been out doing other people’s stuff all day long. Setting a schedule for production and sticking to it will be crucial. It’s fine to give her friends a break on the rate, but her time isn’t worth less just because she has other things to do. An hour is an hour, and she should charge fairly for it. She should also write the production schedule into the contract, so everyone is clear that she’s committing to X hours per week and the project will be complete by date Y. That protects her from pressure to put full-time hours in when she signed up for a part-time gig. Assume that things will take longer than expected…they always do.
As far as rates go, that will depend some on her area. One way to get local prices is to decide how long she (realistically) thinks each page should take, then ask some local designers for their hourly rate. Then, multiply. It’ll probably be higher than she wants to charge, which leads to more decisions. She has to decide what her time is worth BEFORE talking that over with her authors. Like you said, let them offer first, but if the offer is way too low, better to decline. It saves heartaches, headaches, and friendships.
It’s customary to have a billing schedule, like you suggested. I was taught to take one third as a deposit, one third when the design is approved, and the final third upon delivery of the printed pieces. Bigger, longer jobs can have many payments, just set it in writing. Also, she should not be afraid to hold the job if they miss a payment. It isn’t about being a butthole, it’s about keeping things clear. Training someone that you’ll work for free isn’t good for either party!
Can’t add much to your statement on royalties, I’ve never dealt with that myself. The GAG book will clarify that issue as it specifically relates to print design.
And for her last question, a citation as “designer” is totally appropriate. It’s not a must, but neither is it unreasonable. It all comes down to what they agree upon, and set in the contract. (Given her description of the work, an entire back-flap feature about the designer is not out of order!)
Something else to consider: working for friends. How will it be if something goes wrong, or if she gets part way though and realizes she’s in over her head? Can the friendship handle this? Working for friends can be a good thing, strengthening the relationship all around, but it can end those friendships, too. If a disagreement must be settled, can everyone separate the business relationship from the personal one? Can their “pecking order” handle the authors becoming bosses, and can Design Monkey handle taking orders when her design decisions are vetoed? Sounds like they’re doing fine so far, but it never hurts to think about these things. I can’t emphasize enough to get a contract with them, friends or not. It’s simply a must. Every time I try to forget that, it comes back to bite me somehow.
Resources: This mailing list is populated by extremely knowledgeable folks who are glad to help a beginner get rolling. It’s not out of the question to sign up and ask for general design advice, even if she doesn’t use the software: http://www.siclist.org/mailman/listinfo/quarkxpress
And here’s a great General Design forum: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ProDesign/
The biggest decision to make is evaluating whether this will be a challenge, or a burden. If she’s going to rue the day she took it on, better to say no. There will be other projects to get started with. Best of luck to her, and thanks again for all the hard work you put into bringing a daily smile to our faces!
Been There, Done That
Dear Been,
Thanks for all the suggestions and resources.
Something else she should keep in mind: publishers generally outsource design work to their own stable of people, so she shouldn’t do any work before she knows what the deal is there.
Dear Sars,
I grew up in a desolate rural area, and spent high school trying to please my strict parents by staying home to clean or babysit instead of any social activities. Now I’m twenty and living with my boyfriend of two years, whom I met online and who is several years older than me. I work full-time and go to the local community college. All my classmates and coworkers are also older than me, often married with kids. I am our sole source of income at the moment.
So here’s the problem — even though I’m very happy with him, I’m starting to worry that I’ve grown up too quickly. I’m not sure how to make friends, so I don’t have anyone my own age to hang out with, and between laundry, bills, and night school, I feel about forty years old. He’s the only guy I’ve ever dated, and sometimes I wish I could have the fun of casual dating or a little more romance and puppy love (he often says we’re “basically married already”). I feel like the “best years of my life” are passing me by and I’m missing all the fun a college student should have. However, I don’t know how to fix it — my parents keep balking on loans and I can’t get any in my name alone, so I can’t go to a larger university with people my own age.
Is there a solution to this dilemma? Or do I just need a swift kick in the ass because I’m not grateful for the good life I do have?
Sincerely,
Young and Restless
Dear Young,
There isn’t really a solution. You can’t really step laterally into the life you think all other college students have, so…stop comparing yourself to other people and look at what’s in front of you. What can you change to make your life a little less drudgerous? (Yeah, I know that’s not a word. Please don’t email me.) Can your boyfriend start pulling his weight financially to take some of the pressure off you? Can you lighten your class schedule a bit — or increase it to get done faster? You’ve got things you can’t change — what can you change to feel a little less like a workhorse?
I mean, if you want the fun of dating, break up with the boyfriend, move out on your own, and date — but if you just want a little more fun generally in your life, or a little less responsibility, see where you can add relaxation and subtract obligation from the current equation.
Dear Sars,
Love your site, love your advice, blah-blah-blah-you’re-awesome-cakes. I have a friend issue that I could use some of your particular brand of clarity on.
With as little back-story as possible, I’ll get into it. M and I have been friends since high school. (We’re both 31 now.) A couple years ago, M and her longtime boyfriend J got engaged. Wedding planning ensued, and I met the rest of the wedding party (as she asked me to be a bridesmaid). I met the Best Man, B, at the first wedding party get together, and we clicked instantly. We talked all night long, pretty much forgetting there was anyone else in the room. Rude, yes. But not intentional. Anyhow, I had a boyfriend at the time, so we decided to just be friends.
About a year later, a week before the wedding, Boyfriend and I broke up for good. Rather ill-advisedly, B and I started dating pretty much right then. We had so much in common and got along so well, that it sounded like a good idea at the time. But of course, everything imploded a few months later, and B and I didn’t speak for a good long while. However, in the past few months, we’ve reconnected and started to rebuild our friendship.
Now, let’s get to the heart of the matter. This past weekend was J’s birthday, and I found out on Monday, from M, that they had a get-together of sorts down at their house to celebrate. To which I was not invited. The previous week, M had vaguely mentioned something about some friends, including B, coming by, but never indicated that it was any sort of party situation. Monday, though, I found out differently.
I’m pretty sure it wasn’t M’s idea not to invite me. In fact, I’m reasonably sure it was J’s, because J never liked the fact that B and I got on so well together, and I’m sure that last year, when things didn’t work out with us, he figured that was the end of it. J and B have been friends for a lot of years, and I know that us seeing each other made him uncomfortable. But that’s all water under the bridge, and I thought we were all friends. But now, now I’m just not sure.
So I’m mad, and confused, and my feelings are hurt, and I don’t really know what to do about it. Does telling M any of this get me anywhere, other than having her feel more guilty than she already does? (Through a series of subsequent emails, I have gathered that not only was this not her idea, but she wasn’t happy about it.) She’s the kind of girl that’s going to take this very personally, even if she didn’t do anything wrong. I could go directly to J about it, but I don’t know how wise that is either. I’m guessing and inferring a lot at this point, and it’s frustrating. Nevertheless, I don’t want this to be an issue the next time the bunch of us get together either.
Should I rock the boat, and have my say? Or should I just leave it alone and wait to see what happens next time?
Oh wise Sars, please enlighten me with your sage wisdom.
Sincerely,
Vexed Ex-Vixen
Dear Vexed,
If you don’t know anything for sure, you need to leave it alone. It’s one get-together, and if it hurt your feelings that they excluded you, tell M that — but don’t press for more information or fish for an explanation. It’s unseemly, and you don’t actually want to know. “But –” No. If J uninvited you, what do you plan to do with that knowledge? You can’t do anything. If he doesn’t like you, he doesn’t.
It’s J’s birthday; he can invite who he wants, and he didn’t want to invite you. If it’s about the B thing, it means he’s a big melodramatic baby, and who gives a shit what he thinks; you’re better off not spending time with him if he can’t be a grown-up about it. But you don’t know anything for sure, and getting into the reasoning and blah blah is just going to amplify the whole stupid situation, so…don’t. Tell M you wish you’d been invited and leave it at that.
Dear Sars,
I am writing to solicit your opinion concerning criticism of online journals (I hate the word “blog.” I feel like prehistoric man saying it: “Me go back cave; me blog now”). I started an online journal to document my amusing adventures in a rather exciting field of work of which little is known to the general populace, and eventually it evolved to include anecdotes of daily life as well. People read it; some like it, some don’t.
My problem is with my sister. I have left my journal open to comments, and every couple of entries, she’ll leave a comment that just drives me insane. Imagine it this way: You’ve got your televisionwithoutpity.com, and some random family member tells you that you that it’s very good (in that patting-you-on-the-head kind of way), then tells you that you should have named it “Television Recaps R Us,” or something equally devoid of subtlety and humor, so people will “know what it’s about.” Or maybe they look at your essay “No Sleep Till Brooklyn” and ask why didn’t you just call it “Going to Brooklyn”? Then maybe they read “The Famous Ghost Monologues, No. 23,” and they tell you that it’s just precious.
My sister just keeps leaving these little criticisms telling me how what I did is very nice!, but I could have written something better. Well, sure, anything I write could be better, but her specific suggestions are just awful. I could deal with that (um…probably) since I figure that putting a journal online makes me fair game to any and all criticisms. However, her unsolicited advice is getting longer and more detailed, and she’s starting to ask why I’m not taking it, and when I tell her that I choose to write in a different way, she gets hurt. I’m scared to be anything more than gentle with my refusals because she is going through an extremely painful divorce right now, and I’d rather not make it worse for her. (Maybe by trying to assert control over my journal, it compensates for the lack of control she has over her own life? Eh, I’m probably overanalyzing.) She’s not getting the point, though, with my polite refusals, and I’d rather not see this escalate into a big dramatic thing, which is where it seems to be headed.
So, my plea for advice is twofold. In the practical corner, how do I deal with her escalating demands for me to rewrite my journal to suit her? In the emotional corner, how irritated am I allowed to be? Lots and lots, since she is being condescending, or not at all, since an online journal is open to any criticism anyone chooses to offer?
It’s Just a Frickin’ Online Journal, Not War and Peace, For Fuck’s Sake
Dear Tolstoy,
In the practical corner, I think you tell her that, while you appreciate her suggestions, you can’t implement all of them — you’ll consider them (which…you won’t, but she doesn’t need to know that), but when she pressures you about them, it makes you anxious, so she needs to back off a bit. She can give her input, but beyond that, it’s interfering and you don’t like it. I think that’s the only way to split the difference besides deleting her comments/emails unread.
Emotionally…I get clueless suggestions about both my sites every day, and most of it comes from people just not taking ten seconds to think that I might have good reasons for doing things the way I do, even if I haven’t explained those reasons to them. It’s irritating at times, but…that’s internet publishing. You learn to just ignore the criticisms you can’t use.
Hi Sars,
I just have a quick etiquette question. I’ve been looking for an apartment by answering “roommate wanted” posts on my school’s housing website. I would prefer to share with another woman, but I can’t always tell if the poster is male or female since I’ve been communicating by email. Is it socially acceptable to simply ask, “By the way, are you a woman?” and is there a better way to phrase it?
Thanks,
Gender-confused
Dear Gen-Con,
When you answer the posts, include a line like, “By the way, I’m looking for a female roommate; please let me know if this isn’t the living situation for me.” The poster can clarify in his/her response.
[7/21/04]
Tags: boys (and girls) etiquette friendships roommates the fam workplace
