Hi Sars,

Regarding your reader who had little money but wants fashion, hair, and make-up help, I recommend that she contact a salon about being a hair model. I did this in the fall and it was a great experience. I got a free cut, very nicely styled to complement my features, and color. It wasn’t for a hair show — the salon was just creating a portfolio, so they took some pictures of me afterwards. My hair came out great — I received a ton of compliments. Also, I met with the stylist beforehand to discuss what I would be willing to do and not do, and then she discussed her ideas for my hair, so the process was pretty stress-free.

Anyway, I saved a couple hundred bucks, looked great afterwards, and on top of that I can add “hair model” to my list of life accomplishments.

Kristin

Dear Kristin,

Cool idea.

Many readers agreed with me that, if you’re going to cheap out on anything, it shouldn’t be your hair.Get a simple style that doesn’t require frequent maintenance cuts (shorter cuts can be an issue in this regard, but my stylist’s work lasts long enough that, if I’m feeling cheap and don’t go in for a few months, it “holds”).Don’t get highlights or anything else you can’t maintain yourself.

Other suggestions from the readers are below.As always, recommendations mentioned more than once are asterisked.

work in a department store and get first crack at the sales
go to the make-up counter, get your face done, get them to tell you exactly what they did so you can do it yourself at home, buy one small thing, and get them to throw in samples*
Target (word)*
outlet malls*
sample sales
invest in a few pricier pieces that are classics and will last through several seasons
posh shoes that make any outfit look good
one of the famous salons’ schools, like Aveda or Vidal Sassoon (although that last one, you might wind up looking like Ziggy Stardust, but maybe that was just me)
cheap store-brand knock-offs of name-brand shampoos and make-up
Filene’s
DSW Shoe Warehouse*
yard sales
flea markets, especially for staples like white t-shirts and socks
make your own skirts from vintage curtains
figure out what you look good in and stick to it*
Old Navy
Loehmann’s
Overstock.com
Zappos.com for shoes (they don’t have everything, but if you can’t find that damn pair of black Puma Californias anywhere else, they’ll have it, and the narrow-footbed Birks, too)
H&M
find designers you like, then set aside a day and comb through the Goodwill racks (bring some wet-naps, though, especially if you’re going to some of the New York Goodwills, because…yiiiiiiiikes, is all I’m saying)
consignment shops*
Ulta
Marshalls
the What Not To Wear books, for advice*
Ross Dress For Less
shop with a more fashionable friend who can tell you what looks good*
stick to the basics for make-up — foundation, concealer, powder, blush, mascara, lip tint — only one of each and only what you need (i.e. one everyday lip color and one for nighttime, and that’s it)
clearance racks in trendier stores, so you don’t get bit on a style that’s out next year
Payless
when you see someone wearing something cool, ask where it came from

That last one is key.You’ll run across the occasional “none of your beeswax” eyebrow-raise, but most people are like me — they can’t wait to tell you where they got stuff, especially if they can brag on scoring a sweet bargain.

One last money- and space-saving tip from me: I can guarantee that you have, and buy, too much makeup.So did I, but I pitched everything I never used the last time I moved, and I haven’t missed any of it — truly.It’s true that many women wear more makeup than I (it would be really hard to wear less), but you don’t need a full shelf of nailpolish; you just don’t.You need three colors and a topcoat.I know it’s hard, because it all looks so tasty there in the rack at the store.I feel you.Try to resist.

My plea for Vine readers is not that classy. Deodorant.
Antiperspirant, whatev.I can’t wear white shirts — they turn yellow.
I can’t wear cap sleeves — sweaty mess.All the usual stuff like
Secret and Degree start smelling really strong and strange — even the
unscented ones. The scary Certain Dri is way too potent — it burns the
hell outta my pits.Does ANYONE have ANYTHING that can help a girl
this summer?Or can someone explain why bleach doesn’t work on pit
stains?

My kingdom for a cap sleeve white tee…

Dear How Do I Feel Thee, Let Me Count The Shirts,

Ernie and I had a theory that, more than other deodorants, Secret turns white-shirt pits yellow in record time.Like, after three wearings.

But you have two issues here: that you’re a sweaty girl (me too), which means you can’t wear certain styles; and that it’s fucking up your white shirts.

Second one first.The yellow staining is caused by a chemical reaction between your pit sweat and your deodorant; solutions include switching to a crystal deodorant, or one with fewer complex chemicals, or a clear gel (not a white solid); finding a fels-naphtha bar (this may require a time machine) and applying it directly to the stains; Rit Dye Remover; a specialty de-greasing stain remover (like the ones they advertise on TV…OxyClean works for some people); white vinegar rinse; and shampoo.

The other trick, which is not a trick so much as resignation, is to only buy white t-shirts cheap or on sale.Urban Outfitters’ Charlotte boy tee is my total favorite, but that type of jersey picks up a pit stain in, like, ten minutes, so I have to buy them marked down or it’s a budget-buster.Several of my friends just buy boy-sized undershirts to save money but those give me mono-boob.Anyway: yeah, Banana makes a white tee that’s cut great, but it’s $25, and if it’s stained in three wearings?Neh.

The other issue is how to stop, or hide, the sweating.I myself have given up.I’m a dewy lass; I don’t love it, but it is what it is.There are medical procedures that you can undergo to reduce excessive sweating — consult a dermatologist.They probably aren’t covered by your insurance, but an acquaintance of mine had her feet zapped to stop the constant oozing and she says it’s the best two grand she ever spent.Your mileage may of course vary.

If you’re looking to avoid the appearance of having just run a marathon, you can still wear cap sleeves — just stay far away from heathered tees, which make the sweating look way worse, and “medium-dark” colors like hunter green and maroon, which ditto.Wearing a clear gel (or using a spray) when you wear a cap-sleeve tee or a tank top can cut down on those lovely little deodo-ball “Klingons” that can accumulate in the pit area, as well as “the siltdown effect” where you sweat, it dries, and there’s a ring of Ban and salt.

Mostly, though, if you’re a shvitzy lady like myself, just remind yourself that, unless you’re stanky, nobody really cares.This is not my favorite time of year for Ye Olde Reaching For Top-Shelved Grocery Items, but again: whatever.Nobody’s nearly as horrified by your pit action as you are.

Readers, the assignment is twofold: 1) cut the sweat; 2) whiten the pits.

Hi Sars —

I love your sites and find your advice to be spot-on.So I thought that you
might be able to help me with this minor problem.

I have a blog, just like all the cool kids.It’s mostly of a personal
nature and meant mostly for my friends and family to keep up on my life in a
different state.However, I noticed from my stats that I was getting a lot
of visits from a certain URL.Later, I found out that the guy that my
roommate had started seeing works at this company.Judging by the search
words used to find my blog, it is more than likely him.

Now, my blog doesn’t have a lot to do with my roommate, but I have mentioned
her occasionally.The guy has been checking my blog a lot lately and
obviously going through the archives.I can’t talk to the roommate about it
because (a) she doesn’t really know that I have a blog and (b) she’s anxious
enough about dating that she doesn’t need to know that the guy has Googled
her successfully.

My sister suggested writing a note to the dude, but I am reluctant to do
this in case it isn’t him.I’ve also stopped mentioning my roommate, but
should I delete the archives?Is there etiquette for a situation like this?

Who Knew Google Was So Powerful?

Dear Everyone Who’s Dated Since Google Debuted, Pretty Much,

People Google each other; it’s a fact of life in 2005.It’s a tad creepy that the guy is combing through your archives, looking for mentions of your roommate — which I assume is what he’s doing; if your blog isn’t specifically, like, a humor site that you want the general public to read and enjoy, that’s probably it — but I’ve done that with various guys and I know they’ve done it with me…usually because they run across TWoP as a result and are all, “…Whoa, okay.”Heh.

Anyway.If you haven’t said anything particularly personal about your roommate, I’d just leave it alone; he’ll get it out of his system and it won’t turn into a big thing.But if you’ve shared stuff you think she might not like your having shared, just take it down and don’t say anything else about her — and start giving the people in your life noms de blog, like I do.Google-proofing your friends and family is a courtesy, and will help to avoid weird situations like this in the future.

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