The Vine: May 19, 2000
Hello Sarah,
A couple of days ago, I received a very unexpected call from an ex-boyfriend. I haven’t spoken to him in a year, and haven’t seen him for nearly two. However, we had a very nice conversation catching up and so on. (We ended on an awkward but not particularly sour note.)
Throughout the phone call, which was quite long, he avoided speaking to me about his steady girlfriend, except to say she was “completely different from him,” and they had “some problems communicating.” He also begged me to call again, and wondered if it wouldn’t be too uncomfortable to hang out again, just platonically.
I can’t help but wonder what his intentions are. Does he want to cheat on his girlfriend with me? Or does he just miss me? Why did he call me? Does he just want to be friends?
I would love to be friends with him . . . but if he has romantic intentions I’m bailing. What do you think?
Regards and respect,
Muddled in Miami
Dear Muddled,
I don’t think your ex has cheating in mind, at least not consciously. It sounds to me like he’s having problems with his current girlfriend, and those problems have inspired a false sense of nostalgia about his past with you. He’s feeling insecure, I suspect, and wants to see if he’s Still Got It – if he can still attract you.
I can’t say for sure, because you haven’t told me enough about the circumstances of the break-up and so on, but that’s how it sounds to me. I’ve received (and made) that kind of unexpected call myself when things go south in a relationship, and that’s usually what it’s about.
Tags: boys (and girls)
