On Not’s problem,

Just a quickie comment that I think her man might have something else going with someone else.It’s based on no info other than what she provided, but if suddenly my BF got cold about the bed and gave me all the assurances that yes, he liked me in that way but was uncomfortable doing it and that it was not my fault, but his own – all my “uh oh, who else is he doing” alarm bells would be ringing. That’s the first thing that came to my mind.

Basically, is Not sure she’s the only?Know what I’m sayin’?

Just my two cents.You’re right, she should probably back out unless she’s SURE
this guy is on the level and is such a wonderful person she’s willing to have a committed platonic relationship with him.

Just Sayin’

Dear Just,

You know, that possibility didn’t even occur to me; the minute Not mentioned a therapist, I assumed the boyfriend had some Oedipal Thing happening and I didn’t even consider another woman.

But that’s right on.He shows all the signs of having a little something on the side.

Sarah,

Just a possibility, but Ms. “Not getting any anymore” may be involved with a guy who’s gay and was trying to “change,” or is just discovering he’s gay –
I’m just saying, from a past experience of my own.

been there, done that

Dear been,

Another good point.I didn’t address that explicitly in my response, but if he’s going to unload on his therapist about the problem, well…his sexuality could be the problem.

Heya,

I read the Vine often and I think you give out great advice.Just a note on entering Canada as a U.S. citizen, you probably lucked out by getting in with your driver’s licence.A licence doesn’t indicate your citizenship, only where you live.If Waiting For Canada doesn’t have her passport, she should use her birth certificate as proof of citizenship.I got in trouble at the border (entering Canada) once ’cause I didn’t have my birth certificate on me.If you’re driving, they don’t always ask to see it, but if you’re flying in I think they do.

Beer Girl

Dear Beer,

Hey, thanks for the kind words.

When I drive through, they never ask me for anything on either side of the border – not a license, not a passport, not a birth certificate, nothing.And coming into US Customs at the airport in Toronto, I have gotten through with only a driver’s license.I think they get a lot stricter with Canadians, because I’ve heard horror stories about the border from my Canadian friends, but seriously, the last time I crossed the border, the whole carload of people was cracking jokes about guns and marijuana, and the guard didn’t even make me come to a full stop.

Waiting should of course try to get her passport back…but in my experience, if she’s got US plates or some other form of genuine US identification, they aren’t going to give her a problem.At least, not in Ontario.Other provinces might work differently.

[11/17/00]

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