"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Home » Culture and Criticism

Posters and vampires

Submitted by on December 8, 2009 – 9:16 PM9 Comments

jim_morrison013From Andy Ihnatko's Celestial Waste of Bandwidth:

Morrison was immortalized first by death at 27 and then by three generations of college kids who needed a poster to cover up a creepy-looking stain in their dorm room. That voice plus thirty pounds of extra flab wouldn’t have gotten Jim Morrison past the cattle-call round of “American Idol.”

Hat-tip to reader Kate M. for the link.

And while I've got you here, a chuckle from Nick X Saves The Day.

Be Sociable, Share!



  • Sharon says:

    Isn't that the truth? Can you imagine what Simon Cowell would say to Janice Joplin?

  • Sandman says:

    @Sharon: I can only imagine it would involve that mealy-mouthed non-word "pitchy." (HAAATE.)

    Can I just say how much I love that your tag set includes "shut up Twilight"?

  • Margaret in CO says:

    @Sharon…and then she'd KICK HIS ASS!!! I'd pay to see Simon take a Southern Comfort bottle upside his big fat head!

  • Jen S says:

    The only government that mirrors me sparkles and watches me sleep.

    Now, off to buy Back in Black. Love me some Andy, ever since I read all his contributions to Roger Ebert's Movie Guide.

  • Cara says:

    Jim Morrison reached out from the grave to ruin a perfectly good episode of "So You Think You Can Dance" last night. I'll second that "shut up Jim Morrison."

  • Sandman says:

    But I can't decide which bit of Ihnatko's article I love more: where he describes Sinatra as "a host organism for hairpieces and tuxedoes" or the bit where he imagines an alternate universe enclosing in its dire coils Annie Lennox's "mescaline-fueled hydrofoil accident in Macau." Gems, both! Thanks for the pointer.

  • Jaybird says:

    That was a beautifully written piece. I've encountered Amy Winehouse's cartoonish aspect every single time I've EVER checked a UK news outlet, so it's refreshing to see someone argue convincingly that she still retains some talent, even if it is buried deep under layers of beehive and winged eyeliner. And booze.

    Morrison remains the best anti-drug advert of all time. Not merely in the "do hard drugs and you'll end up like HIM" sense, but also in the "do hard drugs and you'll end up listening to his crap and thinking it's deep" way. Not sure which is worse, actually.

  • LynzM says:

    You successfully convinced me, via that review, to listen to an Amy Winehouse song. Kudos, Sars. (I still have such a hard time getting past the image to the music.)

  • Krissa says:

    Amy Winehouse ended up on my Pandora station one day – I'd never heard anything by her except Rehab, and certainly wasn't overly impressed with her "celebrity" image.
    Tears Dry on Their Own had me dancing in my chair, and at the same time wanting to cry a little. Great song. Great talent. (Also happens to be on Back to Black)

    Excellent piece. Thanks for the link.

Leave a comment!

Please familiarize yourself with the Tomato Nation commenting policy before posting.
It is in the FAQ. Thanks, friend.

You can use these tags:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>