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Home » Culture and Criticism

The N Cookie AA: Round 1, Flight 3

Submitted by on June 26, 2014 – 7:24 AM18 Comments

ncookieaa

At last, a relatively easy flight.

(Not sure what's going on here? Check out the N Cookie AA FAQ.)

That fifth slot is causing mild agita, but compared to previous rounds, when I felt like I was leaving little round children behind every time I voted, this one's a cinch: Archway Frosted Lemon; Mother's Iced Oatmeal (as sister companies, Archway and Mother's likely have the same formula); those little fat-bombs of my youth, Do-Si-Dos; and Bahlsen Hits. Annoying packaging just makes me fonder of them, somehow.

So what's #5? I do love a Ginger Thin, and I do love an Apple Newton — but I've got to point to Vienna Fingers (sorry) (…not sorry) as my fifth pick. You just get me, fauxnilla flavoring.

What will you guys pick? The nominations spoke well for the Hob Nob, so I think that heads up the charge, followed by the Petit Ecolier, both Girl Scouts, and milk chocolate Milani. — Sarah D. Bunting

*****

I think it is pretty obvious that whenever Girl Scout cookies are in the fray, they will dominate. That said, I still need to spout off on these two: in the first place, the Girl Scouts have CLEARLY been skimping on the peanut butter in the Do-Si-Dos (I grew up in MN calling and selling these as Hoedowns, by the way) to the point where the resulting smear can now only be seen under a microscope. In the second place, the Trefoils (which will always always be Scoteas) have gotten so thick and dry that they now require an entire glass of water just to get a single bite down! WHEN I WAS A KID, Scoteas were so thin and delicate and light and yet, for all of that, each cookie was incredibly buttery and rich. You could never stop at just one.

I wonder if Girl Scout cookies would be so beloved or popular if we had access to them all year. Hmm. It's a philosophical conun-crumb.

Does anyone else remember those microwaveable s'more cookies? I know at least one of you does, since you nominated it. Those were some crazy-ass cookies! Individually wrapped in plastic, they were graham crackers stacked with a piece of chocolate and a layer of marshmallow that PUFFED when you zapped it in the microwave. It was so awesome. I'm thinking if anyone has tracked their history, Gael has.

To be fair, slapping s'mores together from scratch and zapping them without a campfire seemed like cheating, but somehow these ready-made cookies didn't. If I recall, the weren't the best tasting cookies and the graham bottom sogged out every time, but the coolness of the concept more than made up for that.

Of all the Newtons, apple was my favorite. It was an entire apple pie contained in a single cookie. Genius. Pecan Sandies, Petit Ecolier, and Stroopwafels are lovely and amazing and I need to start stocking all of them again.

Where Hob Nobs are concerned: there was a time when we loved these so much and they were so hard to find in the U.S. that one of our wedding guests arrived in Minnesota from England with several rolls in his luggage for us. When we honeymooned in the UK later that year, we came home with Swiss Rolls, four bottles of Trinity College/Cambridge port, and rolls upon rolls of Hob Nobs. That was almost 14 years ago, and now we can pretty much have them any time we want, which of course means that we really don't. As for the debate between milk and dark (plain), I appreciate both milk and plain but in my old age, I have gravitated more toward milk.

Predictions: the Girl Scouts will make it through, as will Petit Ecolier and Mother's Iced Oatmeals. (I still remember the hue and cry when they almost had to shut down Mother's out here but it was ultimately saved.) I don't know what that last one will be. Surprise me, people! — Stephanie V.W. Lucianovic

VOTE!

Vote for your FIVE (5) favorite cookies!

  • Pepperidge Farm Milanos, milk chocolate (43%, 246 Votes)
  • Girl Scout Do-Si-Dos/PB Sandwich (42%, 238 Votes)
  • Famous Amos Chocolate Chip (40%, 227 Votes)
  • Girl Scout Trefoils/Scoteas/Shortbread (35%, 198 Votes)
  • Teddy Grahams (34%, 191 Votes)
  • Mother's Iced Oatmeal (31%, 175 Votes)
  • Keebler Pecan Sandies (31%, 175 Votes)
  • LU Petit Ecolier, dark chocolate (28%, 162 Votes)
  • Anna's Ginger Thins (26%, 147 Votes)
  • Stroopwafels (22%, 126 Votes)
  • Keebler Vienna Fingers (21%, 120 Votes)
  • McVitties Hob Nobs, milk chocolate (20%, 112 Votes)
  • Apple Newtons (20%, 112 Votes)
  • Archway Frosted Lemon (18%, 104 Votes)
  • Pocky Strawberry (9%, 53 Votes)
  • Archer Farms Dipped Macaroons (8%, 43 Votes)
  • Dunk-a-Roos (7%, 39 Votes)
  • Microwaveable s'mores (6%, 36 Votes)
  • Snackwell's Crème Sandwich (6%, 33 Votes)
  • Bahlsen Hit Vanilla (4%, 23 Votes)

Total Voters: 569

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18 Comments »

  • attica says:

    Sometimes, I crave a Sandie, and nothing else will do. There is no substitute for that particular jam.

  • RK says:

    It is a cruel trick of nature to develop a peanut allergy as an adult. I know what peanut butter tastes like, and it is fucking delicious. I have not had a GS Peanut Butter Sandwich Cream cookie, Peanut Butter TandyKake, Peanut M&M, or my favorite candy bar ever, the Take 5, in about 7 years. It is to cry :( Nevertheless, the GS PB Sandwich Creams (along with the Shortbreads) will ALWAYS be my favorites.

  • Jenn says:

    I think about those microwavable S'mores every time I'm in the grocery store and see how they've put graham crackers, marshmallows, and Hershey's bars together in a display.

  • bluesabriel says:

    My mom used to buy tons of boxes of Trefoils because she loved them. Once we ate all the good boxes, that was all that was left, and I would just be so disappointed. Stupid Trefoils.

  • Colin says:

    I'd never had a stroopwafel until relatively recently, and omigod I wish I'd known about them earlier. Chewy and crunchy and caramel-y in all the right ways.

    …I'm baffled that Famous Amos is leading right now, though. Something about their recipe just does terrible things to my digestive tract. Oof.

  • Kristin 2 the Kristin Boogaloo says:

    I have no idea what dunk-a-roos are, but I voted for them just because of the awesome name. And I agree, Keckler, that Do-Si-Dos are not what they used to be; but, they're still better than many.

  • LizzieKath says:

    I'm appalled at the state of the Petit Ecolier! When we each had to cook for the other two roommates during senior year one night a week, getting those bad boys was fancy AND easy. It was always a win. Those things are delish.

  • Meri says:

    Stroopwafels! I love them so, and then I end up saying the name in a very bad accent as I eat them.

  • AJ says:

    Kristin – Dunk a Roos were a staple of my childhood and I'm sad to see them not getting more love! Little teddy graham-esque kangaroo cookies with what amounted to canned frosting to dunk them in… Low brow, but I would totally be eating them now if they were available anywhere other than bulk membership stores.

  • Keckler says:

    The thing about Petit Ecolier is that it was a cookie excuse to eat a candy bar. Not that adults need the excuse, but in the parent world it goes: Candy, Cake/Pie, Ice Cream, Cookie, and Petit Ecolier allowed kids to skip.

  • adam807 says:

    Maybe this comes from not really having them as a kid, but I find Girl Scout Cookies to be deeply mediocre. Like, they're fine, I won't turn one down, I'll buy some if a Girl Scout crosses my path, but I can't handle the way people freak the fuck out over them. I think it must be the scarcity thing. I just can't think of any other explanation.

  • janbrady says:

    I'm embarrassed to have voted for the humble Snackwell cookies, but of all of them, I actually did enjoy the vanilla sandwich cookie–super-sugary, to make up for the lack of fat, and still somehow a little buttery?–especially in comparison to any of the dry, hockey-puck "chocolate" cookies in that line. They're especially good refrigerated. Yum.

  • Sandman says:

    Is it scarcity, or a sentimental attachment to tradition, or the possibility of buying cookies in huge quantities (surely tantalizing to a kid?) that acounts for the freaking out? Again, my experience is Canadian, and therefore possibly not germane, but Girl Guide cookies here come in two forms: chocolate or vanilla sandwich cookies. (Both rather over-sweet and usually a little stale.) That's it! We don't get the gamut of Thin Mints and whatnot that you guys have.

    I always thought Dunk-A-Roos sounded horrid. Canned frosting? Le blerf.

  • Keckler says:

    Hm, I don't seem to have finished my thought at 11 PM last night! What I was sleepily trying to say is that Petit Ecolier allowed kids to leapfrog over the interim desserts and head straight to the candy bar territory in the form of a cookie.

    @adam807 that's exactly what I think. Every year I tend to grow more disappointed in them. For awhile, I was craving and loving them which was probably more eating nostalgia than anything else, but I'm feeling lately that the nostalgia isn't sustainable especially since I do think they've gotten worse and traveled so far from their original recipes.

  • Tarn says:

    Yeah, if Girl Scout cookies were boy bands, trefoils would be the Danny Wood. They have their merits, but ultimately don't compare to the rest and you'll always be disappointed if none of the others are around to join them.

    Aww, apple newtons. I miss my mommy.

  • Heather C. says:

    Ugh, Do-Si-Dos. The only Girl Scout Cookie I hate. Tastes like hay with peanut-flavored glue to hold it together.

    I was not only a Girl Scout, but my mom was Cookie Mom. You'd go to the basement and gain 10 lbs just by breathing. The Thin Mints, my husband's favorite, have held up, as do Samoas. But the Tagalong, my very favorite, has changed. Still a lovely cookie, but the actual cookie part is now heavier and the chocolate on the outside is just not…right.

    I do love eating Teddy Grahams with the kids, though!

  • Jamie says:

    The Girl Scout cookies have deteriorated in flavor since they got rid of trans fats a few years ago. The texture is all wrong now too. If I want to eat healthfully, I'm not going to pick a cookie, so put the fat back, GSA!

  • RachelG says:

    @janbrady, be not ashamed. You are not the only one with a love that shall not be named… for Snackwells. They are my go-to in the vending machine because I can pretend that they are healthy since they're low-fat. That's practically a vegetable, right?

    And for those of you who are expelling my beloved schoolboys, shame on you! Those things are to-die-for. No joke. They are reminiscent of the dark chocolate milanos, but they're fancy because they have a French name.

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