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Home » Baseball

Recs Du Jour: “It Wasn’t THAT Funny” Edition

Submitted by on May 8, 2007 – 2:24 PM26 Comments

Stuff that made me laugh over the last 48 hours:

1. Russian performance art with cats. My favorite part: “A few minutes later police arrived and arrested them together with a few cats as a clue for investigation.” As you do. (link via Glark)

2. I went to the Yankees game with the Couch Baron and Joe R last night. The game itself didn’t make me laugh — unless you count the mirthless chuckles prompted by Mariano Rivera’s posted ERA, which really really isn’t funny, at all — but we made our own fun.

a) Bobby Abreu tore a monster hole in his uniform pants early in the game, and it looked like it kept getting bigger as the game went on; one hard slide and he’s in the pinstriped version of those ’70s White Sox uniforms with the shorts. (Sarah: “I hope he’s wearing boxer briefs under there.” Joe: “I don’t.”)

b) The Couch Baron was totally offended by the crizzappy beer at the game. I met the man over a pitcher of room-temp Meisterbrau, first of all, and second of all, I know for a fact that he’s gone to baseball games before, because I have gone to baseball games with him, and also he lives in the world, so I really have no idea where that came from; I mean, nobody likes paying $8 for a Bud Light, but he seemed genuinely surprised at this non-microbrewed state of affairs. Fairly funny on its own, but then some dude walks down the stairs next to us with a tray of what looks like Sam Adams Brown, and the Grumbly Grandpa Baron sits bolt upright and says, “That was a real beer!” So I’m like, “Go ask him where he got it,” so he asks the guy, and he marches off to get us some, and he comes back with two “real” beers.

Sarah: “So what is this?”

Couch Baron: “Michelob Dark, or something.”

Sarah: “Oh, okay, cool.” [sip]

Couch Baron: [sip]

Sarah: “This is just as bad, dude!”

Couch Baron: “Yeah.”

c) The “Fat Man In A Little Sweatshirt” song. I don’t know why that cracked my shit up, but it did. It’s doing it again now, and it’s not even a song — it’s one line, of a song that doesn’t even exist, except in our minds. But Joe sang it as though it were totally a song, all “doodle dee doo, fat maaaaan in a little sweatshiiiiirt, doodle d– what?” and now I have to write the song, but I can’t decide if the fat man is in a slightly too small sweatshirt, so his arms stick out like the little brother in his snowsuit in A Christmas Story, or if it’s a super tiny girlie sweatshirt that’s all bunched up around the fat man’s neck. Sadly, it has almost the same exact melody as “The Ballad of Uncomfortable Truths Guy,” which is a problem, except when it has almost the same exact melody as “Sentimental Journey,” which is an even bigger problem.

(Wing tells me it’s probably a take-off on “fat guy in a little co-oat” from Tommy Boy, which I didn’t get because I haven’t seen that. I don’t care, I’m still writing the song.)

3. “What of it? WHAT OF MY HEN?”

4. The phrase “oh fiddlesticks,” particularly when it’s in all caps: “OH FIDDLESTICKS.” …I’m on five hours of sleep here.

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26 Comments »

  • spike says:

    Random chicken, what the? I…..don’t get it. Is it because I’m getting old? It is, isn’t it?

  • Rachel says:

    You haven’t seen Tommy Boy? I kind of don’t know what to do with that. Yet it makes sense, too. It’s not the funniest movie ever, but for some reason it is the most-quoted movie in our house. Hmm.

  • Sars says:

    My loathing of David Spade is not exactly undocumented. I’m told I would be able to tolerate him in TB, but if I can’t, it’s two hours I won’t get back.

  • Kate says:

    …You might give TB a try, just for that scene. Chris Farley is trying on Spade’s tiny, tiny blazer. And singing. Hee!

  • Juliette says:

    No, it really is funny. Worth a watch, David Spade and all. I’d under NO circumstances EVER suggest you watch, say, Joe Dirt. But I don’t turn off Tommy Boy when it comes on TV. It’s sophomoric humor, granted, but I don’t think any of us are above some o’ that, now and then.

  • bristlesage says:

    God bless chickens, may they always remain funny.

  • Karen says:

    I’ve never seen “Tommy Boy” either, but I DID see Sunday’s “SNL in the 90s” special and Sandler was talking about sharing an office with Farley, and trying to work, and Farley continuously saying, “Turn around!”

    “What? it’s not gonna be Fat Man in a Little Coat, is it?”

    “Noooo….”

    And he’d turn around and there would be Farley, all “Fat Man in a Little Coo-at!”

    Sandler could barely keep from cracking up, just telling the story.

    So, as I was reading about the Fat Man in a Little Sweatshirt, I was thinking–Damn! She must have seen that special! Because I had no idea it was in a whole damn movie.

    I probably need to get out more.

  • Lily says:

    Okay, the hen harness is perhaps my favorite image in the TN canon. I can’t picture it without laughing. Good times.

  • Elizabeth says:

    I turned my friend Miss K onto TN via the Regina convos. I believe the hen one may have been the very first.

  • Kate2 says:

    Ha, I love Tommy Boy so much!! It’s the first thing I ever saw David Spade in, so I was sorely disappointed to discover he’s actually… an unfunny douche. Boo.

    I hated the other Spade/Farley pairings I’ve seen. Tommy Boy is the exception, not the rule. Though if you also hate Farley and his moron/baby talk thing, it’s pretty much doomed for you.

    No matter the hatred of Spade, it’s worth a watch for Rob Lowe. He’s hysterical as the Obviously Evil Guy (and also ends up shirtless. I’m just saying). And you can always use your handy FFW button and watch the parts with Lowe in them if you get too irritated.

    But if you just can’t bear to watch anything with Spade in it, I understand. I have a deep, epic, and incurable hatred of Ben Stiller that boggles the minds of a few of my friends. So it’s possible that your “give Tommy Boy a try!” is equivalent to my “but… Zoolander!!” in which case, never mind. Retracted entirely.

  • Kate2 says:

    Oh, I forgot to say: COUCH BARON STORIES!! I love Couch Baron SO MUCH. It took me a while to “discover” him because I don’t watch any of his currently recapped shows, but he’s my favorite in the Buffy archives. Love Couch Baron. So much.

  • Joe R says:

    Man, for someone who never saw Tommy Boy, you sure picked up the melody with a quickness.

  • Kelly says:

    Randomchicken.com was the most absurd thing ever. I think the picture of chicken coldcuts damn near killed me.

  • LTG says:

    In D.C., there’s one booth at the stadium that sells Guiness. You have to go get it, and it may be a bit of a trek from whereever you happen to be sitting, but it’s totally worth it.

  • ferretrick says:

    I’m still reeling over the expecting a glorious Sam Adams and ending up with Michelob. That shit is wrong.

  • Jenn says:

    I think what makes “Tommy Boy” so funny is that David Spade isn’t trying to be funny most of the time; he’s the straight guy. So if you think David Spade isn’t funny, this is the perfect movie for you because…well, he’s not funny.

  • Craig says:

    You have to see “Tommy Boy”, if only because you’ll never be able to sit through an airplane safety demonstration without giggling after you do, which of course makes said demonstrations much more bearable. I’m not a huge Spade fan either, but he actually was the right actor for this role. Lowe is funny as hell, and the Dan Aykroyd cameo is great too. It isn’t Shakespeare, but it is funny.

    And the beer selection at Yankee Stadium doth truly suck greatly, although I don’t usually use the words “glorious” and “Sam Adams” in the same sentence. Best beer, at least in my experience? The Ice Palace (I refuse to call it the “St Pete Times Forum”) in Tampa – there are a few stands that have Guinness, Pilsner Urquell, Bass, and the Ambrosia Of The Gods, Newcastle Brown.

  • Sars says:

    …Dude. Newkie Brown and baseball. That’s some good shit right there.

    I read some article somewhere that talked about the concessions at all the major-league parks, and I seem to recall that, while Yankee Stadium didn’t rank dead last, it was second- or third-to-last. If anyone can find that link, post it here.

  • Noelle says:

    ESPN’s Page 2 ranked the major league ballparks a couple of years ago, including concessions. Yankee Stadium, tied with Bank One Ballpark (Arizona), ranked above only Fenway on that point. Here’s the link to the wrap-up page: http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/stadiums (outdated, of course, since Olympic Stadium is on the list, in last place).

  • Karen says:

    Sars, you might mean this:
    http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/stadiums

    On the “concessions” list, the Yankees outrank only Fenway, and tie with Bank One–wherever the fuck that is (I really hate corporate names on ballparks and refuse to use them).

  • Molly says:

    Nothing to do with anything except it is a rec in its own right –

    I rented Loverboy this weekend and was highly impressed. Since you gave positive mention of Nine Lives and Sherrybaby, I thought you might care to check it out, if you haven’t already. The last minute and a half are unnecessary and kind of dumb, but everything up until that is pretty brilliant. And for once, rampant nepotism is acceptable, because everyone, including Kevin Bacon’s children, is great.

  • Alex says:

    “Crizzapy”? Please tell me that was a Newsradio reference, dilsnoofus.

  • Sars says:

    ‘Twas.

  • Melissa says:

    OK, everyone posting here has to STOP until Sars has sat through Tommy Boy. It’s OK, we’ll wait……

    (worth every minute, if only for the “Housekeeping…” scene, which is oft-quoted in my house, especially when we find ourselves on the road in a bad motor inn, which alas is not too often anymore)

  • FloridaErin says:

    Newsradio quotes! You all supremely rock.

    Also, my husband will sell his soul for some Newcastle. If you like that, you should also try Shiner Bock. He’s picky about his beer and he’s obsessed with that stuff.

  • Cathryn says:

    Damn. Sounds like the Yankee Stadium concessions are actually worse than the ones at the AA park in my city. I’ve never been to a major league park, but I would have thought it would be the other way around. Come on up to Hadlock Field – our microbrews and imports get their own stand.

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