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Home » Baseball

The Big Sad Machine

Submitted by on September 24, 2010 – 5:57 PM11 Comments

I spotted a billboard for this promotion earlier today, near a gas station. Just how broke is this mofo, anyway? Does the Hit King still have back taxes to pay?

At least he's not selling signed balls outside of a casino. (For once.)

So…who's going to buy a Volt and go to that dinner with my digital recorder in his or her inside pocket? Please?

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  • Tylia says:

    When I was in Vegas this summer, I spotted him schilling, uhm, er I mean signing autographs at a sports memorabilia place in the Ceasar's Forum. I thought it was kismit, or fate, but apparently it's a common occurrence. It makes it less mockable somehow….

  • Grainger says:

    From the looks of things, nobody who might actually need a Volt is going to be able to afford one. The entire production run is preordered by rich people.

    The local birdcage-liner had a puff piece about the Volt, full of enthusiastic quotes from the local software slobs and tiny-phone magnates about how they just couldn't wait to get their shiny new Volt and put it in the garage next to their Leaf, their Tesla Roadster, their two Priuses, their Smart Car…

    I'm all, "you love going green so much that you'll gentrify the market and leave poor people stuck in their smog-blasting early-Nineties Honda Civics and Toyota Camries?"

  • Amanda says:

    You saw this in Cincinnati?? You're in Cincinnati?? Because I'M in Cincinnati, and I see this commercial on TV like four times a day. It's kinda sad.

  • Elizabeth says:

    Better question: how bad does business have to be before you come up with this promotion? And include used cars in it?

    Looks like your minimum buy-in is $2300. (What the hell's wrong with it?)

  • jlc12118 says:

    oh, yea, he's there allllll the time… i think he actually might own the store – every weekend i think…

  • Sandy says:

    It doesn't matter if the Volt plants trees as it goes along the road; it's still better for the environment to drive your Civics and Camries (or in my case, your "Optima") until it can be driven no more. They may not take fossil fuels, but it takes resources to build the things.

    And Pete Rose: That is a sad sad situation.

  • Kristen B says:

    Aw, damn. I grew up in Dayton, Ohio (about an hour north of Cinci) during the heyday of The Big Red Machine. And even as Rose devolved into doucheyness through the years, I still have a soft spot in my heart for Charlie Hustle. This makes me sad.

    PS And yes, I believe he belongs in the HoF. If convicted drug felons are allowed in, then he should, too. The man earned it the way you're supposed to: on the field. /mini-rant

  • Amanda says:

    Oh, and Sars: I wouldn't be so sure about the casino~they're building a new one in downtown Cincinnati, and I'm sure he'll be there hocking his crap.

  • ferretrick says:

    Also Cincinnati here, and Amanda is totally right.

  • josh says:

    I've heard that if you pooled all the game-worn autographed Pete Rose jerseys, he woulda had to have changed jerseys like 3 times per game.

    No shilling opportunity for cash surprises me about Pete Rose. I'm sure he's still in debt to someone somewhere, just as I'm sure he still can't stop betting. And I'm fine with him out of the HoF, since he bet on baseball, lied about it, lied some more, lied to everyone he could find as loudly as possible, right up until he realized he could make some money off of coming "clean" and faux-apologizing.

    Joe Posnanski had a great bit on Rose this week in his blog:

  • Sarah D. Bunting says:

    @josh: I've read that, during the game in which he broke Cobb's record, he changed clothes like eight times.

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