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Home » Culture and Criticism

May I introduce Professor Nevermet Catsbefore

Submitted by on January 7, 2009 – 6:29 PM41 Comments

I cannot stop laughing.   Cannot!   I don’t know if it’s the blur of angry pets, the “okay, here’s the thing: NO SIR” expression on the lefthand cat’s face, or what, but 1) that guy is in strips right now, and 2) it is hilarious.

Hat tip to Wing for the link.




  • Faith says:

    Bwahahahahaha! My favorite is the 2nd one from the bottom, with the cat in the middle suddenly coming into focus in its apeshitness. Hahahahahahahahaha!

  • KPP says:

    Hee. This was posted on cuteoverload as well and the guy in said photos posted in the comments. He says that he was not injured during the sequence of events.

  • Mary says:

    I’m so happy you linked to it — I needed some validation that it is the funniest. I’ve got the church giggles here at work.

  • Tricia says:

    I swear it gets funnier. At first I was like, “Oh, heh.” but every time I look again I see another hilarious detail I’ve missed.

  • Sarah D. Bunting says:

    @KPP: Not even a scratch? Because the center cat alone…that was like looking directly at the Ark.

  • KPP says:

    From the cuteoverload post:

    WOW!!! im all over the internet!!! thanks for the post! I was unharmed so were all my animals….
    Fat cat – Caesar
    Tabby – Punisher
    Boston – Frito!!

    Ryan | Jan 06, 2009 at 11:03 AM

  • Amalthea says:

    Oh, my favourite thing of 2009 so far, hands down. My soul thanks you for posting this.

  • cayenne says:

    OMG, I needed a laugh, so thanks, Sars.

    I like the look on the guy’s face as he gets more panicked when his hold-a-zoo disintegrates, and the middle cat as it whomps the Boston in the nose. And I love the last picture as the tabby is obviously sliding out under his arm – it’s like my beastie trying to escape when I have to clip her toenails.

  • Emily says:

    Hee! I like how in the last photo, the cat on the left is all, “That’s it. I’m out.”

  • Jenn C. says:

    Oh god, thank you for this.

    I needed that laugh.

  • greer says:

    I lost it at the second photo.

    The cat in the middle is pointing at the photographer and saying “No Photos! Give me that camera!”

    The perfect Christmas card.

  • Desiree says:

    The second one from the bottom is my favorite, too. The cat on the left looks extremely freaked out by the fat cat losing his shit. The look on his face (so scared!) starts up the giggles again.

  • tulip says:

    @Tricia YES it does!!

    Oh dude I needed this bad tonight! Thank you Wing and Sars! :)

  • Maria says:

    Awesome. The left-hand cat and the dog are both clearly aware of the fat cat’s insanity and don’t want to be anywhere near him. The looks of “Dude, you let him out of his cell? Unshackled? I am SO OUT OF HERE” are fucking hilarious.

  • alivicwil says:

    Faith – I love that pic, too. The apeshit cat in the middle, and the terrified-as-fuck one on the left!

  • Jaybird says:

    BA HA HA HA HA! It’s like a pet version of those mall-Santa photos where the kids are wigging and arching their backs as they go airborne to get away. It’s like a hairy little Manson family photo. Well, that’s redundant, but still.

  • Krissa says:

    Frito! What an excellent name for a Boston.
    I am pretty sure I could easily reenact this at my house.

  • Margaret in CO says:

    I love the first pic, in which Professor Catsbefore is completely unsuspecting that Armageddon is about to happen in his LAP!


  • Jen M. says:

    I have a picture sort of like that of my mom, trying to corral 3 cats to pose in front of her for a picture. One is wandering off to the side, one is escaping over her arm, and the third is just sitting there, but obviously quite exasperated.

  • Yahtzee says:

    Thanks. Now people in my local Starbucks are looking at the crazy lady who’s laughing so hard she’s crying . . . while sitting alone.

    But dude, seriously. I mean, sometimes my cats get into fights on the bed near my feet, but I’ve never held a blizzard of claws, teeth, and fur in my arms. Then again, I haven’t been dumb enough to pick up both cats at once since the days they each weighed three pounds and I could hold one in each hand.

  • MelanieRose says:

    *wiping away tears*

    I can’t decide which is my favorite picture… the second one, where Caesar the fat cat is clearly starting to slide down off the lap, the second-to-last where he’s looking at the camera all “I WILL KILL YOU ALL!!” and the other cat, Punisher, is holding his arm all “dude, chill!” or the last one where Punisher is nothing more than a forehead squeezing out of Mr. Ryan’s elbow…

    That’s my new wallpaper.

  • JenK says:

    Oh, I love this! What was he thinking?? My favorite part is that he’s still smiling in the third picture, even though things are clearly starting to go wrong, like maybe if he keeps smiling for the camera, the animals won’t have a complete uprising in his arms.

    Man. It’s STILL funny!!!

  • JeniMull says:

    The only thing that has made me laugh harder than those pictures are reading these comments!

  • AmyNewman says:

    The cat on the left owns my heart. You know he is the voice of reason. I’d hire him as manager in a heartbeat.

    In the fourth photo, he has turned to the owner to say, “Buddy, you do REALIZE what is going on here, don’t you?” Looks the owner in the eye, then sends up the “Warning Will Robinson” alarm in the fifth photo, and jumps ship in the sixth.

    Best laugh I’ve had in forever. Thanks so much.

  • Sandman says:

    “Professor,” hee. Tricia’s right: it definitely gets funnier the more I look at it.

  • Inksmudge says:

    I am *crying* over here, I am laughing so hard!! Between the pix and these comments, I am fairly certain that I won’t be able to breathe. So awesome. Thanks for this, Sars!

  • Liz in Minneapolis says:

    Now I want to try this with my 2 giant, fully-clawed, though very laid-back cats, each of whom usually requires both arms and a shoulder or bust-shelf to hold individually, because I am crazy.

  • KPP says:

    Actually, this sort of reminds me of this past Christmas when I was going to try and take pictures of my bunnies wearing Santa hats to send out as my Christmas cards (it was going to be intentionally silly)…I didn’t get very far. But I did scratch the heck out of my hands (one of them doesn’t like to be picked up…pretty much at all). Even with piles of lettuce, I couldn’t get them to sit still long enough to snap a picture (I wasn’t crazy enough to try and put an elastic band on the hat to hold it on their heads). Clearly, I should have used the snap lots of pictures at one time setting like this guy did. Maybe next year…

  • Sarah D. Bunting says:

    @Liz: I’ll do it if you’ll do it.

  • ferretrick says:

    A tomato costume would make it art, Sars.

  • Sandman says:

    @Liz and Sars: Oh, please post pictures of the resultant high kitty dudgeon / carnage, I beg of you!

  • Sarah D. Bunting says:

    You say that like I won’t do it.

  • LALALA says:

    See, as the owner of a Boston Terrier, I could have told him this was doomed. You can tell from the look on the dog’s face in frame 1. Oh, they’ll behave for a second, but give one the slightest opening and it’s mayhem. A young Boston Terrorist with 2 cats, oy.

    Thanks for the giggles, all.

  • Jenny says:

    @ Sars, haven’t you had enough stitches lately?

    (Although, I’ll admit to desperately wanting to see said pictures.)

  • Liz in Minneapolis says:

    Oh, absolutely. Crazy cat lady picture coming up after this weekend. (My camera is malfunctioning right now, and all my friends are busy this weekend!)

    (Well, the friends who love me enough to assist with the cat-wrangling are busy, anyway.)

  • Serendipity says:

    Wow, the cat on the left (OK, the guy’s right) looks EXACTLY like my cat Aysia.

  • mtvcdm says:

    Just so you know, this now has a pending greenlight to Fark’s main page.

    I know because I was the submitter and I laughed as hard as everyone else.

  • Alyson says:

    What I want to know is how/why the Professor allowed these pics to be uploaded onto the Web. Not that I’m complaining that he did so, but…you know. He’s never gonna live this down.

    Although, I do so love that his cats are named Caesar and Punisher. *glee*

  • Sarah of the Midwest says:

    I cried.

    Thanks, Sars.

  • Gretchen says:

    Love it. I love the picture he has on his desktop, too. =^.^=

  • Tina says:

    Okay, I’m late to the party but this is the funniest thing I have seen in a LONG, LONG time. And I kind of want to marry the Professor, and marry my cat Sylvia to the left-hand cat. I love how, in the second photo, he’s looking out at us all, “Oh boy, folks, I know exactly what kind of hell is about to break loose…don’t say I didn’t warn you.” And the look of miserable commiseration between him and the Professor in the fourth photo.

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