Trillions of potential subjects
Submitted by Sarah D. Bunting on February 15, 2008 – 3:11 PM35 Comments
But it’s jury duty which the United States Postal Service chooses to honor with a stamp.
Hundreds of thousands of species of flora and fauna. Dozens upon dozens of minor holidays; myriad dead Americans of significant achievement. Olympians. Buildings. States, foods, seasons. What gets a stamp? Jury duty. I tremble to think what didn’t make the cut, because if I kept a list of possible stamp subjects, jury duty would have to get in line behind crabgrass, cramps, and that little saliva-suction frambus the dental hygienist uses during a cleaning.
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Tags: curmudgeoning
At least it’ll be obsolete (sort of) as soon as postage goes up again in May…
are you being facetious, Leslie, or are rates really going up again in May? Sigh. It’s been YEARS since I wasn’t a rate behind, using up my old stock months after the change. I’m really tired of always needing to add on a 2 cent stamp.
And I have strong feelings against using ugly stamps, so those UG-LY liberty bell forever stamps? No way. Not buying them until they put something prettier on it.
Yes, it’s going to be 43 cents in May. Forever stamps bought for 41 cents would still be good, but I see your point about the ugliness.
Ambient – yes, rates are going up a penny on May 12. At least, the first ounce of a first class letter is, and postcards are, but the 2nd ounce will still be 17 cents.
Time to stock up on Forever stamps.
I actually bought those stamps. As inconvenient and annoying as jury duty always is, there’s something incredibly powerful to me about it and about the concept of being judged by a jury of one’s peers and all the democracy stuff behind it.
Ugh. Why can’t they all be forever stamps? That way, once you found a stamp you really liked, you could buy a bunch and keep using them without cluttery one- and two- cent add-ons. I, too, refuse to use liberty bells…or anything with an insipid angel. Who is going to choose “jury duty” as the image they want their correspondence to carry?
Yep–postage is going up a penny in May, only a year after the last increase. Airmail is going up even more, and is now approaching a dollar per…half ounce, I think, which is crap, especially when they can’t get it anywhere overseas in a decent amount of time.
Is it just me, or does that look like some sort of gay pride jury duty flag? its a smidge too “rainbow”.
Aaand now I’m obsessed with the idea of a “cramps” stamp. Or maybe one…honoring? …commemorating? …PMS. What would be on that? Like, a big jug of Midol and a pan of brownies? I would totally buy such a stamp, I admit.
I heard postage is going to go up every year from now on. So those Forever stamps, ugly as they may be, are starting to look like a wise investment. Ten years from now when people are buying $3 stamps to send their holiday cards, I’ll be laughing and thinking of all the money I saved with my uuuuugly stamp stash.
Kat – The Gay Agenda strikes again! We must protect the children from subversive stamps! Heh.
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA. Oh my dear god. Thank you so much for that much-needed late-day guffaw. Jesus Christ. Continuing with the extraordinarily relevant list of things the stamp COULD have been, there should be a contest. See how many thounsands more concepts exist in readers’ minds that would have been slightly more, well, inspiring to Joe America? Or lists of things that ended up on the cutting room floor – that could actually be better. I might just make my own lists anyway – my last hour of work is going to rock. Thanks Sars.
There should be a stamp in honor of the glorious Jersey Tomato.
I would probably buy a sheet of stamps with the dental-moisture-sucky-thing on them.
I’d love to see a commemorative spit-sucker stamp, personally.
I’m really pissed at how insane overseas postage is getting. It takes three stamps to mail a damn letter now! When your best friends live in Canada and the UK, it’s pretty damn expensive. And I’m tired of ever-increasing postage rates. Even if it’s just a fucking penny. Why didn’t they just jack it up two cents last time?
This shit angers me more than it should, but damn, no wonder no one sends paper mail any more. Who can afford to?
@Molly – It’s not like the level of service goes up with the postage increase either. Even if you pay for overnight, they won’t guarantee overnight delivery. I’ve never figured that one out. “That will be fourteen extra dollars, but it won’t get it there any faster.” WTF?
“Frambus” = awesome. We need a stamp to commemorate that!
I admit, after laughing at the concept, that I don’t think it’s the worst civic value to promote — it just reads kinda stupid on a stamp. (How about “twelve angry men”?) But yes, Kat, the design does immediately lend itself to another interpretation of “pride.”
I’m a civil trial lawyer and my juries have always been conscientious and attentive. I’m always grateful for that so maybe I’ll have to buy up a bunch of these stamps.
The New Yorker had a Talk of the Town piece about this stamp when it was issued. I remember the writer, in describing the silhouettes on the stamp, noted that they included “one woman with unaccountably messy hair.” That still makes me giggle. (Not amused by this rate increase, though. Gah.)
Haa. I hate the spit sucker thing at the dentist, but maybe a dental hygene awareness stamp? Kind of like the Glarkware “party in my mouth” shirt? hee.
Is postage really going up again in May? WTF? Maybe I just never paid attention, but I feel like postage was the same (37 cents) for a reeeeeeeeeeeeallly long time, and now out of nowhere over the last few years it’s gone up a million times. What is UP with that?
I was incredibly pissed when it went up a couple of months after I went to the trouble of going online and stocking up on stamps – they had the most adorable Muppet ones!! I still have some of those suckers. I think I would now need a SIX CENT stamp to go with each to make them current. I ran out of two centers when postage went up again and I had to start putting 2 two centers on with them, so recently I’ve just been throwing up my hands and using two.
If they’re going to keep raising the postage like this maybe I should buy stamps in a variety of lower denomenations so I can mix-n-match my own every couple of months. “oh it’s 58 cents now? No problem, I’ll just use two twenties, a ten and two fours!” wtf, post office?
Maybe they’re trying to improve the public’s perception of jury duty. I collect stamps, and I really want this one now. :D
Julia, you maybe be interested to know that in Canada we now have forever stamps. For example if you buy a roll of stamps this year there is no cent value on the stamp itself, and no matter how high stamps go up you can still use them. I think the postal service figured that the money they could possibly lose would be less than the cost it takes to keep printing 1 cent stamps.
How is that jury duty anyway? It’s just 12 faces lined up. And they’re all the same height! I call shenanigans! Discrimination against short people!
Hee. I want a cramp stamp.
Back in college I was so groused about ANOTHER rate increase, I remember going through my pile of “you have to keep them around because you know you’re gonna need ’em” one-cent stamps, and stamping an letter to a friend entirely with one-centers. Completely covered the front except for the addresses. My friend showed it to me later, of course someone had to hand-cancel the thing and you could practically SEE the annoyance of the postal worker through the cancellations.
In retrospect, that’s just mean. It’s not the postal worker’s fault that the rate’s going up. And I’m sure it increases the chance that your letter will “accidentally” get “lost” under a cabinet.
But as a student? A nicely gratifying piece of passive aggressive rebellion. “Oh, you want extra postage?? Take THAT!!”
@llyzabeth: My mom worked PO Box sections for years, and I think stuff like that was more of an amusing distraction than an annoyance. Of course, these days it probably happens more.
@Kim: That’s an awesome idea. If someone can find or devise a Norman Rockwell filter for Photoshop, it’s entirely possible to have midol-and-brownies stamps printed by a custom service. I’d put them on all my bills.
I think that woman with “the unaccountably messy hair” is ME. I seem to be called up for jury duty every time I’m eligible again…
I’m a lawyer, too, and the jury duty stamp caught me by surprise. I actually choked up a little when I saw them (I know! I’m emotional – so sue me. You won’t win if you take it to a jury). I know people are annoyed by jury duty, but our system would be truly awesome if EVERYONE “served with pride.” Off my soapbox now!
Keight – THERE WERE MUPPET STAMPS AND I WASN’T INFORMED? Well, crap. *goes off to search eBay*
I thought about buying a gazillion forever stamps when they first came out, but I didn’t after I read this article on Slate: http://www.slate.com/id/2166475/. Stamps are getting cheaper, relatively speaking…who knew?
Molly – Aww, you didn’t see them? They rule. I’d even send you some, but I only have the Jim Henson ones left – they were a sheet of various muppets (8 or 10, I forget), with a single B&W picture of Jim Henson stamp off to the side.
I really enjoyed using them, thinking about the person or place I was sending the letter or whatever to and deciding whether Miss Piggy, Sam Eagle, Gonzo, Fozzie… Aww. I miss my muppet stamps…
I think I’d buy forever stamps less as an investment and more as a convenience issue – then I don’t have to give a crap when postage goes up, because I know my stamps are good.
I had the same problem with the Muppet stamps! Stocked up and got stuck with several sheets. And they’re made to look like the characters are bursting through the (white) envelope, so pairing them with those horrible Navajo Jewelry stamps totally ruins the effect.
I think next time I will just order a ton of “Forever” stamps. I don’t think they’re so ugly, and what that Slate article doesn’t take into account is the inconvenience of having to keep up with the constant rate increases. In light of that they seem like a great investment to me!
All you guys who are bummed about missing the Muppet stamps should head over to the USPS.com site and order up some Yoda ones. Close enough, right?
I wasn’t surprised about the jury duty stamps, to be honest. I have two relatives who collect stamps and have collections going back FOREVER, and trust me, they’ve already done all the flora and fauna, olympians, state buildings, exotic diseases, foods, states, seasons, TV shows (well, still waiting for MacGyver stamps, but I won’t hold my breath. . .), etc.
I think they should do menstruation stamps and let you buy them in small blocks labeled “Lightdays” and large blocks labeled “Super Plus.” But nobody ever asks me these things. Um, for reasons that likely just became obvious! :)
On teen Jeopardy tonight there was a stamp category, and the Jury Duty stamp was in it! None of the kids got it right, but I was screaming, “Jury Duty!” at the TV, thanks to you, Sars!
There are a few local towns who could use some PR for jury duty. In Greeley, Colorado, a fairly sizable city, they actually had to force people walking by the courthouse to serve because nobody who was summoned showed up. They’re allowed to compel anyone to serve at any time by law, but the summons system is an act of courtesy towards the legal system and towards fellow citizens. As it is, the courts don’t have near enough willingness to punish the no-shows – people who won’t even call with their excuse and just decide to ignore it. In this state, we’ve gone from people coming up with their own *courts* in absence of officials, to this.