Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

We’ll live like kings!
August 26, 2008 · 5 Comments

Damn Hell Ass Kings is back up!

Crazy Nines: Gesundheit! (Chewiest Baseball Names)
August 26, 2008 · 12 Comments
Crazy Nines: Gesundheit! (Chewiest Baseball Names)

Let me say right up top that this is a pretty arbitrary list; not every chewy name in baseball history made the cut. Generally speaking, I included names 1) longer than ten letters, and names …

I’d like to thank the Academy
August 25, 2008 · 11 Comments

Reader Karen tipped me to the fact that I’m nominated for the Hot Blogger Calendar.   So is Ann Coulter,   though, so: grain of salt.   Thanks to the nominating party for the compliment, …

Dressed To Kill
August 25, 2008 · 10 Comments
<I>Dressed To Kill</I>

Maybe, back in 1980, Dressed To Kill got over via shock value.Almost 30 years later, in a world that’s more savvy about trans issues, the “twist,” such as it is, doesn’t do much to hide …

The N.C. Double Scoop Round Of 32: Write-Ups, Flight 2
August 24, 2008 · 22 Comments
The N.C. Double Scoop Round Of 32: Write-Ups, Flight 2

Confused?   Click here.   Ready to vote?   Click here.
Strawberry vs. pistachio. This is a hard one for me, actually, because I really like both flavors. Hell, I’ll even have them together in a …

The Bridge
August 24, 2008 · 30 Comments
<I>The Bridge</I>

The Bridge is sporting a 70% “fresh” on the Tomato-meter as of this writing, but the 30% who dislike it do so with a virtuous dudgeon. “This could be the most morally loathsome film ever …

The N.C. Double Scoop Round Of 32: Write-Ups, Flight 1
August 23, 2008 · 17 Comments
The N.C. Double Scoop Round Of 32: Write-Ups, Flight 1

Confused?   Click here. Ready to vote?   Click here.
Cookie dough vs. black raspberry/Oregon blackberry. My bias here is obvious — thanks to my mom’s quart-a-week habit back in the winter of ’73, when you …

The Departed
August 23, 2008 · 39 Comments
<I>The Departed</I>

It’s a very good movie; it’s not a great movie. Conventional wisdom is that Scorsese got the Oscar for The Departed that he’d actually earned for GoodFellas (or Raging Bull); I can accept that, and …

The Vine: August 22, 2008
August 22, 2008 · 175 Comments

Dear Sars,
You’ve helped me with some Procrastination Issues that I wrote about, about two years ago — thank you very much. I have another issue that I hope you can deal with better than I…
‘Cause …

Crazy Nines: Colors Of The World, Spice Up Your Life! (Not You, Mike Greenwell)
August 21, 2008 · 4 Comments
Crazy Nines: Colors Of The World, Spice Up Your Life! (Not You, Mike Greenwell)

Starting Position Players
C Bob “Red” Kinsella
As far as I can tell, Kinsella never even put on the tools of ignorance in the majestic total of four games he played for the New York Giants. Why …