“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.
From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.
Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.
Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.
The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!
Sars —
I’m writing with regard to the letter from the person who was worried that she was going to end up doing all the chores like her mother even though her boyfriend was willing to …
Dear Sarah,
I am a college sophomore who may be flunking out of school within the next week or two.This has been building for a couple of years and involves a few different issues, so I’ll …
Oh wise Sars, who is far more versed in the language than I —
I was composing an angry letter to a political wingnut (exposed as such over on TINO) and realized I had a usage …
I have heard it said that the sweetest emotion is relief. In fact, I have said it myself, that there’s almost no feeling more delicious than coming out of a bad dream to find yourself …
Hey Sars,
Well, I dated this guy about a year ago now, the first boyfriend. Right after
I graduated high school at 17 and suddenly there’s this 21-year-old guitar
player interested in me. (Never been on a date …
Sars,
I really enjoy reading The Vine both for the great advice and your ability to cut a problem down to its root cause.That’s exactly what I’ve been trying to do with a certain issue in …
Dear Sars —
Stumbled across your site last week, and I really like your humor and advice.I’m in a rather unique but frustrating situation and I don’t know what to do — I’d appreciate your opinion.
I’m …
Hi, Sars. I’m a longtime reader of your site and love everything on it, especially the GBC. Hee.
Anyway, my friend has this cat. It’s not what you’re thinking. Both the friend and the cat are …
At three-ish the next day, Lionel dialed the wall phone.
“Tell Marie she needs to come over,” Miranda said, and Lionel nodded. “Tell Marie to tell Diz –”
“Hey, Marie, it’s Lionel,” and he waved his arm …
Sars,
You might direct Cute towards Torrid.com or Hot Topic — or other stores that cater to the “freaky” teen demographic. They quite often carry adult sizes of kiddie-type clothes/shoes. Also, Payless has some cute pink …