“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.
From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.
Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.
Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.
The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!
Dear Sars,
This isn’t nearly as life-and-death as many of the problems you get, but I’m
curious about your opinion.The “Save Touched by an Angel from atheists
who are petitioning the FCC to remove all mention of God …
Ms. Sars —
It’s not an original problem, but it is mine, and I hereby foist it on
you.Well, not really, but I do need help.
Issue one: I’m an extremely closeted 28-year-old possible lesbian, who
doesn’t really want …
Dear Sars:
My best friend at work (we’ve shared an office for almost three years) is
getting married in a couple months in the Bahamas.They are inviting about
a hundred or so people, but aren’t expecting more than …
After reading The Vine today I needed a cigarette real bad because Living on the Hellmouth’s problem and your response hit really close to home.
J’s problems are much like my own, except I’m on the …
Sarah: Mflt.
Couch Baron: Oh, uh…hello?
Sarah: Hpll nn jfft mr spcffft.
Couch Baron: I…think I might have the wrong number.
Sarah: NNMRRRFFFF!
Couch Baron: …Sarah?
Sarah: Mmm hmm.
Couch Baron: Uh…are you…okay?
Sarah: Mmm…hmm!
Couch Baron: Okay, so…the hell?
Sarah: Frrrk, sfff hrrk kfffrrpp …
Sars,
I met a girl last July named Susan.A mutual friend of ours, Allison,
thought we would be good together and set us up.The first date was a
double-date with me and Sue, Allison, and her boyfriend.It went …
Hi Sars,
As I read the letter from Frigid, I kept wondering if I’d somehow written
this letter myself in my sleep or something — I have the exact same problem.
Anyway, I thought I’d pass on that …
Hey Sars —
This may seem too explicitly a “sex” question at
first, but it ends up being more of a mental and
relational problem.
I don’t love sex.I don’t dislike it, per se, but
it doesn’t have the impact …
Dear Sars,
When you identify more with characters in Buñuel films
than with the cast of The Real World, you just might
have a problem. So here it is, and hopefully you can
help: I have real issues with …
I never remember, on the way to Penn Station, how much I love taking the train. On the way to Penn Station, I have to concentrate very hard on other things, things like not running …