Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Home » Stories, True and Otherwise

Like Mike

Submitted by on October 9, 2009 – 10:52 AM16 Comments

Earlier in the week, my friend Michael Griesdorf passed away unexpectedly.I hadn’t seen Dorf in some time, but he’s one of those people I could meet up with after years had passed and get right back into it — and nobody got into it better than this guy, I mean to tell you.Nobody loved getting into it more; nobody had more fun getting into it, or made it more fun for his debate partners.He’d dunk on you with his point and then right away give you a hand up to the next topic.

e-e-cummings

(not Griesdorf)

I admired that fine mind, but more, I enjoyed it.It welcomed us.He wasn’t trying to show off about how smart he was (very), or out-maneuver you for the sake of it (already done before you started talking, likely).I think he just loved to think about things with other people.I remember standing down the street from the WaWa one night, a frigid night during reading period — we had run into each other on our respective mid-15-page-paper sandwich runs, and walking back to the dorms together, we started discussing condiments.

And somehow, we full-on got into it about condiments.Not angry-yelling got into it, but we felt so close to the grand unifying theory of spicy mustard as it related to the apocryphal gospel of St. Thomas and principles of quintessential American-ness (…college!) that we stopped walking, got out our sandwiches, compared, ate, debated…and then a guy we knew walked by and Dorf jumped him into the conversation, so then we had to stand there a little longer and smoke.And then someone else we knew came up, and someone she knew stuck her head in and introduced salt and pepper to the equation, and then an hour had passed so I had to go back into the Wa for more cigarettes, and when I came out, I saw a little crowd down the block, everyone in it thinking about mayonnaise.And…you know.College.But also: Griesdorf.

e.e. cummings has a line to the effect of “there’s a hell of a good universe next door: let’s go.”Talking to Griesdorf felt like that — let’s take a trip, have a look.Let’s us do that.I’ll really miss that.A lot of people will, people who hadn’t met him even.

I’ll save you a seat at the Dip, friend.

Share!
Pin Share


Tags:      

16 Comments »

  • GeorgiaS says:

    Sorry for your loss. He sounds like a great guy.

  • Tisha_ says:

    Sars, I’m sorry you lost a friend. He sounds like a hell of a guy.

  • Anlyn says:

    That reminds me of a Louis Simpson poem, Chocolates, where a bunch of people are at a party and everyone is bored until Anton Checkov (yeah) brings up the topic of chocolate. I have always loved that poem.

    May your friend rest in peace.

  • Emerson says:

    I’m sorry too. Through a chain of causes and effects that doesn’t bear explaining, your tribute resulted in another donation to Frisbee Golf, so maybe that’s a little consolation.

  • robin says:

    My sincere condolences on the loss of your good friend. Everyone should have at least one or two good “deep thinker, good talker” friends in their life. I suspect that you yourself are such a friend to those lucky enough to be among your personal friends, and I’m glad you had another with you.

  • Nina A says:

    I am so sorry for your loss.

  • Kate says:

    I’m very sorry for your loss, Sars. Mike sounded like a great guy and an even better friend.

  • LynzM says:

    I’m so sorry, Sars. He sounds like a hell of a guy.

  • MartinP says:

    Mcihael’s funeral was yesterday. Michael and I had been friends for about 25 years. He was an amazing person and friend. I am still shaken by his passing. Someone at the funeral said that the loss of him was “scandalous”. I agree.

    Thank you for your post.

  • I’m so sorry for your loss, Sars.

  • Sarah D. Bunting says:

    Thanks, everyone.

    “Scandalous” is just it. And I believe the man himself would sign off on the word choice.

  • Blake says:

    Thanks, Sarah. Been thinking of you.

  • La BellaDonna says:

    I’m so sorry, Sars. It sucks when the good ones go.

  • Danielle May-Cuconato says:

    I worked with Michael in Ottawa – at the office of the Clerk of the Privy Council – this story is perfect – so Michael. We were lucky to know him.

  • Lauren--NY says:

    Oh, this was so sad. I’m so sorry you lost a friend. He sounds like one in a million. <3

  • Rachel Sklar says:

    I went to high school with Griesdorf, spent lots of “group” time with him as one of my then-boyfriend Lawrence’s best friends. Lost touch with him for about a decade and then had the chance to reconnect with him in NY not even 2 months ago when Lawrence was in town. It was SO nice to see Griesdorf again – the smile still wide, the hair more manageable, besuited and natty and studly in a way that had clearly been well-honed over the decade. I was impressed! He was still irrepressibly bubbly – was so happy to be back in NY, loved his apt, loved his life – we had nebulous plans to get together where we’d discuss secrets of his U.N. tour of duty and hot girls I knew to set him up with. I can’t believe any of this. It’s a terrible fucking tragedy.

    Sars, TWoP was my first blog obsession, way before I ever did anything on the Internet. Getting a “Tomato Nation” hit for my search on Griesdorf yesterday – when I heard – made me smile. Felt like a little link. Loved this story.

Leave a comment!

Please familiarize yourself with the Tomato Nation commenting policy before posting.
It is in the FAQ. Thanks, friend.

You can use these tags:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>