In The Presence Of This Continent
September 11, 2017 · 60 Comments

Years ago, my parents won a day trip in some sort of silent auction, a boat trip that would take us all around the island of Manhattan.

Baseball

"I wrote 63 songs this year. They're all about Jeter." Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls' Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don't forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

Poppy-Fields Movies: The Couch Of Fame
June 5, 2017 · 108 Comments
Poppy-Fields Movies: The Couch Of Fame

6/5/17: Your objection to The Firm not being on the PFM Couch Of Fame…is sustained!

8 Sick Burns On Trump And Mar-a-Lago From Madness Under The Royal Palms
May 25, 2017 · 2 Comments
8 Sick Burns On Trump And Mar-a-Lago From <em>Madness Under The Royal Palms</em>

Laurence Leamer's overwritten Palm Beach chronicle isn't great…except the parts dragging the Commander In Cheeto.

The Poppy-Fields Movie Couch Of Fame: The Firm
May 8, 2017 · 8 Comments
The Poppy-Fields Movie Couch Of Fame: <em>The Firm</em>

Not just screwing, readers. All sorts of intimate acts, voting and whatnot.

The Vine: May 3, 2017
May 3, 2017 · 14 Comments
The Vine: May 3, 2017

How does the VineMind think I should best approach how much of my gastrointestinal disorder I should discuss with various people?

The Vine: April 26, 2017
April 26, 2017 · 16 Comments
The Vine: April 26, 2017

Dear readers: Should I ever move again AH HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAA [sob] obvs a trick Q, no I shouldn't. Anyway: shoes!

The Vine: April 12, 2017
April 12, 2017 · 15 Comments
The Vine: April 12, 2017

So I have this friend. He's charming and funny, and we enjoy spending time with him when we go out to bars and restaurants.

The Vine: April 5, 2017
April 5, 2017 · 15 Comments
The Vine: April 5, 2017

I have a question I'm hoping you or the readers can give me some fresh ideas on. I feel like I need a hobby.

The Vine: March 23, 2017
March 23, 2017 · 13 Comments
The Vine: March 23, 2017

Two coworkers, W and J, sit next to each other, then there's an empty desk, then me.

The Vine: March 15, 2017
March 15, 2017 · 14 Comments
The Vine: March 15, 2017

I think I might want to cut my brother out of my life, and I have no idea what to do.

NCAA (For Real This Time): Join The TN Bracket Group!
March 13, 2017 · 6 Comments
NCAA (For Real This Time): Join The TN Bracket Group!

After years of food/culture brackets, why don't we do a real one?