Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Hi! Um, so, are you…eating? Right now?
Wing Chun: No. Why? Who.
Sarah: Have you eaten? Recently?
Wing Chun: Well…how recently is "recently"?
Sarah: You know. Recently. Like since, say, June.
Wing Chun: This involves Michael Jackson. …

Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Oh, hello.
Wing Chun: Oh. Hello.
Sarah: You know…
Wing Chun: I know. Oh, how I know.
Sarah: And the thing is…
Wing Chun: Mmmmmm-hmm.
Sarah: Because I just…I…
Wing Chun: …If I may?
Sarah: Please.
Wing Chun: SHUT. UP. TOM. …

Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: …Dude.
Wing Chun: …I know.
Sarah: Dude.
Wing Chun: I know.
Sarah: You know that scene in Jason and the Argonauts with the skeletons?
Wing Chun: I…don't think so.
Sarah: With the, where they're swarming?
Wing Chun: I'd remember …

Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Hi. Okay, here's the thing.
Wing Chun: Oh, dear.
Sarah: I know Kid Rock should go in the Girls' Bike Club. I know this.
Wing Chun: But you don't want him in it.
Sarah: No, I …

Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Oh, hello.
Wing Chun: Oh, dear.
Sarah: Heh.
Wing Chun: Well, that isn't a "we haven't spoken in the phone in a while" "oh, hello."
Sarah: No, no, it isn't.
Wing Chun: That is a "guess who's …

Wing Chun: AAAAAAAAARRRRGGH!
Sarah: AAAAGGHHHH!
Wing Chun: RRRRRRRRR!
Sarah: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Wing Chun: WAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Sarah: UUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHH!
Wing Chun: NOT!
Sarah: I KNOW!
Wing Chun: FUCK!
Sarah: SHIT!
Wing Chun: ASS! ASSHEAD!
Sarah: FUCKING…FUCKER!
Wing Chun: HATE!
Sarah: HATEY HATE!
Wing Chun and Sarah: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE!
Wing Chun: I CAN'T STOP SCREAMING!
Sarah: ME …

Wing Chun: Hello?
Sarah: Helllloooooo!
Wing Chun: Hee. It's about time.
Sarah: Can you believe that?
Wing Chun: Well. It's not like he was known for his clean living.
Sarah: But…wait, who are we talking about?
Wing Chun: Rick…James? Aren't we?
Sarah: …

Sarah: Hello.
Wing Chun: Oh, hello.
Sarah: So. What's up?
Wing Chun: Oh, you know. You?
Sarah: Nothing. Not a thing.
Wing Chun: Meeeee neither.
Sarah: …
Wing Chun: …
Sarah: [cough]
Wing Chun: Anyway.
Sarah: Okay, so, the thing is, and I hesitate to …

Wing Chun: Okay — not to obsess about Girls' Bike Club over here, but you know who we forgot, and who's the GBC president emeritus?
Sarah: Who?
Wing Chun: Billy Joel.
Sarah: Ohhhh yeah. Man, he just wrecked …

Sarah: Do you happen to know if there's a planet in retrograde?
Wing Chun: Why, because Reagan died?
Sarah: You know, I hadn't even thought of that. I could totally count that. My hair, Hobey's teeth, J.Lo …