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“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

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Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

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The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

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Articles in Stories, True and Otherwise

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 21: Davenport, IA to Northwood, OH
August 22, 2011 – 4:40 PM | 22 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 21: Davenport, IA to Northwood, OH

I wished I could stay at the hotel longer. So big! Such good coffee in the lobby! So tired of portaging my bags in and out and up and down, getting stuck in doors, making …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 20: Lincoln, NE to Davenport, IA
August 19, 2011 – 10:15 AM | 10 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 20: Lincoln, NE to Davenport, IA

I’ve found on these trips that biting off a big mileage chunk on a weekend day is a mistake, so I decided to take it easy today, a Saturday — stop and browse around where …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 19: Boulder, CO to Lincoln, NE
August 15, 2011 – 9:31 AM | 4 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 19: Boulder, CO to Lincoln, NE

I got a perfect country night’s sleep and woke up at 6:30 AM, unprompted. I actually swung my feet to the ground, yawned, and stretched. I never do that. I’m out of bed with my …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 18: Rock Springs, WY to Boulder, CO
August 15, 2011 – 12:26 AM | 5 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 18: Rock Springs, WY to Boulder, CO

Jay told me the day before about a little Siamese that wandered into his room a few times. When I got up and pulled my curtains back, I saw her in a sunbeam in front …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 17: Elko, NV to Rock Springs, WY
August 14, 2011 – 10:04 PM | 19 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 17: Elko, NV to Rock Springs, WY

There are two kinds of women in the world: the kind who are like, “Sam Elliott? He’s a pretty good actor, I liked him in that Cher movie,” and the kind who would knock you …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 16: San Francisco, CA to Elko, NV
August 13, 2011 – 2:02 AM | 5 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 16: San Francisco, CA to Elko, NV

Couch Baron and I parted ways at around 10:30 AM, he to the airport, I to find a post office that, if it exists, is in a Macy’s and I never found it. Back to …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 15: San Francisco, CA
August 11, 2011 – 10:19 AM | 5 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 15: San Francisco, CA

I hadn’t let myself dwell on it, because what good would it have done except to paralyze me, but a part of me believed I wouldn’t get to California, that I would end up towed …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 14: Reno, NV to San Francisco, CA
August 9, 2011 – 12:45 PM | 30 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 14: Reno, NV to San Francisco, CA

A man from Fresno quizzed me in the parking lot, not about the car, but about whether I’d come all that way by myself. “Courage…courage,” he said. I hadn’t thought of it that way…or not …

Big Country Little Car Tour, Day 13: Elko, NV to Reno, NV
August 8, 2011 – 2:48 PM | 13 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour, Day 13: Elko, NV to Reno, NV

I stopped at a CVS on the way out of town to restock on sunscreen and snacks — a warehouse-size store with slot machines by the checkout. At ten in the morning, most of the …

Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 12: Green River, WY to Elko, NV
August 7, 2011 – 12:53 PM | 8 Comments
Big Country Little Car Tour II, Day 12: Green River, WY to Elko, NV

I began the day in a mood of grim exhilaration: the route promised the most daunting driving yet. The locals have accustomed themselves to it, no doubt, and developed methods of timing their drives and …