Baseball

“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.

Culture and Criticism

From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.

Donors Choose and Contests

Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.

Stories, True and Otherwise

Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.

The Vine

The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!

The Vine: April 29, 2003
April 29, 2003 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
I am getting married in three months, and having a bit of trouble with my maid of honor. I’ll call her “Cindy.” Basically, she has said a couple of times that I’m being a …

The Famous Ghost Monologues, No. 2: Vincent Joseph Bruck
April 28, 2003 · One Comment

I don’t know what name you’d use for me. The ghost-hunters dress up the terms, to try to sound professional, and I believe their name for me is “repeating”…”repeating”…you know, I don’t remember the second …

The Vine: April 25, 2003
April 25, 2003 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
After deeming various personal problems just too embarrassing even to share
anonymously with a top-notch advice giver such as yourself, I’m finally
writing to you with a cat question.
My cat is a former stray who showed …

The Vine: April 24, 2003
April 24, 2003 · No Comment

Hi Sars —
Could you pass this on to Rodent? I work in animal rescue, and our
organization is affiliated with the Baraboo Guinea Pig Rescue. She has a
list of links to medical information and is easily …

The Vine: April 23, 2003
April 23, 2003 · No Comment

Dear Sars:
About a year ago, I began experiencing several episodes of what I’ll call existential depression (that’s my fancy term for it, anyway). Bypassing the rather uninteresting details of these episodes, the upshot is that …

The Vine: April 22, 2003
April 22, 2003 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
Here’s kind of a twist on the classic love triangle story…
A year ago, I’ve met a wonderful man. He’s bitingly clever, possibly the funniest person I’ve ever met, and he entertains me greatly. We …

The Famous Ghost Monologues, No. 1: Resurrection Mary
April 21, 2003 · One Comment

It’s gotten harder — it’s gotten a LOT harder, and I’ll tell you why. Well, okay, I guess I should say first that it’s a different world from when I started out. Back in the …

The Vine: April 18, 2003
April 18, 2003 · No Comment

Oh, oh, I know this one! I do! Impulsiveness-Impaired said:
“But you want to go to the beach and hang out? Ummm, sorry, can’t. I’ve got
readings and papers to catch up on, say I.”
Several paragraphs later, …

The Vine: April 17, 2003
April 17, 2003 · No Comment

Dear Sars,
I had two cats. Callie, 11, Anya 1. Sweeties, but they never really
caught onto the getting-along thing. They had their areas and stayed
out of reach, and after a few months, I had no cat …

The Vine: April 16, 2003
April 16, 2003 · No Comment

Hi Sars,
I have a dilemma involving an ex and a trip to Japan. I’ll start with
some background.
Let’s not give the ex an alias, because “he” works just fine. He and
I met over four years ago …