“I wrote 63 songs this year. They’re all about Jeter.” Just kidding. The game we love, the players we hate, and more.
From Norman Mailer to Wendy Pepper — everything on film, TV, books, music, and snacks (shut up, raisins), plus the Girls’ Bike Club.
Helping public schools, winning prizes, sending a crazy lady in a tomato costume out in public.
Monologues, travelogues, fiction, and fart humor. And hens. Don’t forget the hens.
The Tomato Nation advice column addresses your questions on etiquette, grammar, romance, and pet misbehavior. Ask The Readers about books or fashion today!
Miss Bunting,
I have a problem with eating . . . I suppose you’d call me anorexic, although I don’t like to put it like that because it’s kind of embarrassing and weird. But recently it’s …
Here is a little problem for you. My mother didn’t have much to do with raising me after the sixth grade, due to her wanting to having a second childhood and moving out on my …
I bitch about clichés for a living: movie clichés, television clichés, clichés about the supposed differences between men and women. Still, clichés enter the language – and stick around long after we’ve tired of hearing …
Ernie and I had a lengthy conversation the other day, as we do almost every day, because we can never just get by with the “hey, how’s it going” check-in and have to complain about …
I mentioned in an article last fall that, one day, I’d like to invent something. At the time, I didn’t know what in particular I wanted to invent; I just knew that I wanted to …
I must stop watching Animal Planet. Every time I flip to Channel 86, it puts ideas in my head about acquiring kooky pets that have no business sharing a Manhattan studio with a human and …
Hello Sarah,
A couple of days ago, I received a very unexpected call from an ex-boyfriend. I haven’t spoken to him in a year, and haven’t seen him for nearly two. However, we had a very …
Dear Sarah,
I want to SKULL-FUCK my best friend’s fiancée.
Okay, maybe that’s a wee bit extreme. I don’t really want to cause her any harm in the literal sense, but I do want her to cease …
Sarah,
Here is my problem, I have been friends with my best friend for about fifteen years and we have been through a lot together. Lately, it seems we have nothing in common anymore. She is …
Dear Sarah,
I guess it’s pretty straightforward. I ended a six-year relationship about two to three months ago. I have been over the relationship for at least a year, so I’m not having any residue sitting …